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Precautions against sexual assault
AbuKhaled
02/16/01 at 15:20:59
Bismillah Al-Rahman Al-Raheem Dearest Sisters, Assalam alaikum wa rahmatullah. A brother forwarded this some time ago, so I am doing so too, may Allah (awj) protect each of you always, and keep you safe. I don't know who originally authored it. Some of you may already have seen it. Forgive me if it causes any offence, or seems inappropriate, I only sent it with the best of intentions, not to blacken any moods, or upset any of you. If we don't look out for our Sisters, who will? That is your right upon your brothers. Nonetheless, if in posting this I erred, I ask your forgiveness for my insensitivity. Ma'assalam, Abu Khaled ----------- I just finished taking the most amazing self-defense class, sponsored by Shandwick, and I wanted to share some really valuable info with you before it goes out of my head. The guy who taught the class has a female friend who was attacked last year in the parking garage at Westport Plaza in St. Louis one night after work and taken to an abandoned house and raped. He started a women's group and began teaching these classes soon after. This guy is a black belt in karate and trains twice a year with Steven Segall. He and the others in this group interviewed a bunch of rapists and date rapists in prison on what they look for and here's some interesting facts: The #1 thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid, or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets. The #2 thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who's clothing is easy to remove quickly. The #1 outfit they look for is overalls because many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing and on overalls the straps can be easily cut. They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered. The time of day men are most likely to attack and rape a woman is in the early morning, between 5 and 8:30 a.m. The number one place women are abducted from/attacked at is grocery store parking lots. Number two is office parking lots/garages. Number three is public restrooms. The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don't have to worry about getting caught. Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years. If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming. These men said they will not pick on women who have umbrellas, or  other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands. Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it. Several defense mechanisms he taught us are: * If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk, I can't believe it is so cold out here, we're in for a bad winter. Now you've seen their face and could identify them in a lineup, you lose appeal as a target. * If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not ba afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target. If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes), yelling "I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY" and holding it out will be a deterrent. * If someone grabs you, you can't beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them. If they grab your wrist, pull your wrist back so your hand is in waving position (palm facing forward) and twist it toward yourself and pull your arm away. It is hard to hold onto wrist bones that are moving in that way. They stumble toward you and you stumble back, so you can use that momentum to bring the same out and backhand them with your knuckles in the forehead, nose, or teeth. * If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh. HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it. It hurts. * After the initial hit, always go for the groin. If you hit a guy's testicles, it is extremely painful. You might think that you'll tick the guy off and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor  is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble and he's out of there. * When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers  and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly. Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can, and if you see any odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble. Please forward this to any woman you know, it's simple stuff that could save her life.

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
Nurain
02/16/01 at 19:06:48
Bismilah arRahman arRahiem Salaam alaykum wa Rahmatullah wa Barakatuhu Shukran for posting this informative message, Insha Allah none of us will ever be in a such a horrible situation. Ma3a Salama, Nurain.

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
Magableh
02/16/01 at 19:44:34
Bismillah Al-Rahman Al-Raheem Assalamu Alaikum Brother Abu Khaled, much thanks for this post. Inshallah we will never need such information :) Wassalam, Serena

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
Slimer_007
02/17/01 at 22:25:02
Assalamu Alaikum, Wow... it's pretty scary how such horrible things happen out there in the world, May Allah protect us from all the evil out there, Ameen!! Thank you Brother Khaled for posting this post, i took self defense a while back, and i needed to refresh some of the basic ideas! Just wanted to say thanks! hehe Wassalamu Alaikum

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
princess
02/19/01 at 12:36:16
[quote]The time of day men are most likely to attack and rape a woman is in the early morning, between 5 and 8:30 a.m.[/quote] walikumas'salaam warahmatullah :) i totally appreciate a brother sharing this..shows that u care bout ur fellow sisters :) but when i read the above..it made me think..how many women r out @ that time? i would think it would be more in the evenings or late @ night..especially for those sisters that work late, or stay @ the uni's..many girls stay @ the library studying till 2am or what not..i always think if u're gonna do this..have a brother walk u back..or campus patrol..or get a cab..:) ma'salaam ;-D

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
Jenna
02/19/01 at 17:07:23
Wa alaikum asalam  Jazakum'Allahkhair May Allah reward you for putting up this very nice information.  May Allah protect us from this..Insha'Allah Allah huma Ameen!! Sincerly, Jenna

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
se7en
09/26/01 at 02:24:56
some awesome advice from ALIM buddy Brother Amir, aka writeamir on the board: ---- Assalaamualaikum. Hmm. Security has been the buzzword lately among the Muslim community. Masjid At-Taqwa over here appears to be the place where the other Imams come to discuss this stuff as we also appear to have the largest security staff. The number of people actively involved is increasing as everybody is trying to protect everybody else, especially the sisters. I personally believe that if sisters would just quit travelling alone, most of these problems would disappear, but in this age of "American Islam" that is unlikely to happen. While of course the focus should be on prevention, I don't think enough has been mentioned with regards to what to do if you are actually confronted. Thus, I thought I would throw in my 2 cents. Before I started practicing Islam, I was pretty devoted to the art of fighting, having trained with a number of Muay thai, jiu-jitsu, and some UFC/Extreme Fighting no-rules fighters. Here are some observations. Good fighters are modest and don't bother people. Bullies are usually cowards with poor fighting skills. This country is into "video game" violence. You know, you just smack the sister with the headscarf on or the 5' 1" 120lb brother, feel cool and nothing happens to you. Breaking people out that misconception quickly will avoid a lot of problems. A good example of this occurred a few days ago. An African brother was walking to Fajr when some African American boys started walking up behind him. He heard them talking a bit and knew there was trouble when a couple pulled back and two of them came up behind him one on each side. He is a small guy but he suddenly turned around and struck one of them hard in the chest. It caught him by surprise and it stopped him. The brother then got away and looked back to see the other african americans beating up the one he had hit. The kid had failed the gang initiation. People like to hit, not get hit. That is why the U.S. always picks on weak little countries. Here is my advice to sisters though it should also apply to brothers. Carry a bag that you can access quickly without opening a zipper. Keep something in it that would not normally be considered a weapon. For instance, one of those new Snapple bottles with the long neck, perfect for gripping. I have a bottle of some drink called Mystic. Keep it filled, even if just with water. It won't arouse any suspicion but if you run into trouble, you can quickly pull it out. One hit will be enough. Oh, you can't really threaten with it like you would a knife. If you pull it out, you need to strike the person across the head in the same motion and have the intention of breaking the bottle. Of course, run whenever you have the chance and don't forget the benefits of screaming. I think people are sometimes so shocked when someone tries to attack them that they are rendered speechless. Other things to remember is that the best place to hit a male is not in the groin area. Sometimes there is a delayed reaction. Go for the eyes if possible . Nothing special, just a quick poke. It always does the trick. Whatever you do, make them short quick movements, no wild swinging or winding up. For those of you considering self-defense classes, I don't recommend the ones designed for women. I find them unrealistic if you are dealing with anybody with half a brain. Don't do things that are too regimented. Things like scratching, pulling hair, biting, etc. are exactly what is called for in these situations. Try things that work to your strengths, perhaps some weapons work. I trained with a trainer for the Minneapolis SWAT team and learning even basic knife skills is an eye opener. Even the cops were very ignorant of these things. I would recommend sisters learning how to use a knife as opposed to mace and things like that unless you live in NYC where knives over 3" are not allowed. Schools in the yellow pages that would teach weapons work would be those that mention things like Kali & Escrima. best places to hit somebody eyes nose throat groin foot/instep(especially if you are wearing heels) shin back of the head(that is why "rabbit" punches are not allowed in boxing) worst places chest area other than the solar plexus shoulder and arms front of the thighs(large nerves are located on the back of the thighs) forehead/top of the head(your hand will most likely break) Inshallah none of this will ever have to be used. Just stay alert, follow the Quran and Sunnah and remember that being overweight and out of shape goes against the Sunnah. I hope this was of some use. If not, I am blaming it on Shaytan. Assalaamualaikum. ---- http://www.IslamInNewYork.com It's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice.
NS

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
Zara
09/26/01 at 09:39:22
slm jazaks bro wlm Zara

Re: Precautions against sexual assault
Barr
09/26/01 at 09:44:34
Assalamu'alaikum :) Jazakallah for the tips :) [quote]These men said they will not pick on women who have umbrellas, or  other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands. [/quote] Ahhh... I've always believed in the trusty ole umbrella... especially the folded ones with the button. One press of the deadly button, and it shoots out, hitting where it hurts most... and most of all, it fits nicely in your bag ;) Allahua'lam
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