Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Help!!!!Please!!!!Part 2 |
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| Anonymous |
| 06/15/01 at 18:11:24 |
| I'm just gonna lay it all out there the best way I know how in hopes that someone sees that both my sincerity and frustrations are very real. I'm no angel. I've done my share of dirt in my life and I wouldn't dare say that I won't do anymore. Some of you will remember me from my post a few days ago entitled "Help!!!Please!!! Hi, it's me again, and I'm not doing so well. I've been checking out some articles from websites like this one trying to get a general idea of what is expected of me as a muslim. All I seem to come up with is that muslims should strive to be perfect, or at least as good as humanly possible, which is actually a no-brainer. I understand that, but knowing myself as well as I do I also understand that this is impossible for me. I suck. Period. Point Blank. I've never been a "bad" person. My conscience was almost always there to keep me on the "right path." I spent years in darkness, searching for some sort of truth to believe in that would make sense. 2 months ago, I turned 23; 2 weeks ago I became a muslim. But now even though I'm a muslim, not having any physical contact with any other muslims is taking it's toll on me. It's almost as if muslims only appear in my mind, but I don't know any personally, I just know they exist. The only muslims that I know are the Nation of Islam and 5 percent cheap knockoff, garden variety kind. I don't have any examples to follow, or someone to try to keep me on the path, so very easily I fall back into sin. I won't lie, I don't do the prayers 5 times a day as prescribed. I'll be lucky if I do them once or twice, if I do them at all. I'll describe it like this: it's like being caged for 23 years of my life, and finally being freed to face the world alone. I'm so terrified of my shortcomings, that I can't be perfect, that I'd rather be in my cage all over again. So this is the part where I ask for help. If anyone who reads this is or knows any muslims in South Carolina, would you please hit me back. My e-mail address is d_black96@hotmail.com, but you can also reply to this message here if you like. Thank you in advance. |
| Re: Help!!!!Please!!!!Part 2 |
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| BroHanif |
| 06/15/01 at 20:41:58 |
| A.W.W. First take it easy on yourself, Islam is a way of life. There is a lot to learn and not everything can be covered in the space of one day. set yourself targets, objectives and goals you want to reach. I'm still learning Islam and I was a born Muslim, it takes time, so take it easy on yourself. Secondly register on this board so people can send you messages and vice versa i.e. you can keep in touch with em. There are good people here who will help you grow in Islam. I'm sure there are muslims in South Carolina, it just takes a bit of time to find em. Please feel free to drop me a message or get in touch with me you can email me on pchelp4me@yahoo.co.uk. May Allah make it easy for you. Yours Hanif |
| Re: Help!!!!Please!!!!Part 2 |
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| Sonny |
| 06/15/01 at 21:12:45 |
| I can really understand your feelings of frustration and worry. There's a lot for a new muslim to learn. If there is a University near you, perhaps you could check with Campus ministries, and they might be able to refer you to an Islamic group. Unlike you I can't say I was naver a bad person, and really, it just made my life so sad, and it just kept getting sadder, and sadder, until one day it just turned stupid, and I had to start laughing about the stupidity of my long sad life. But who wants to live their whole life that way? I doubt if anyone. I decided to take my conversion very slowly. Last time I tried to convert, I think I tried to do too much all at once, not that it was so much, but it was too much for me. So as Br Hanif say's, go very easy on yourself while you are learning. I also shared my thoughts with my family and friends, though they do not share my viewpoint, they have been supportive. I found a mosque about an hours drive away, and it was a wonderful experience to go there, I just enjoyed it so much, it was well worth the drive. Perhaps you can search the net under "Islamic Societies of South Carolina" and find something in driving distance. Well, good luck. If I can help in any way, let me know. Patti |
| Try to keep strong |
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| Ahlam |
| 06/15/01 at 23:15:34 |
| Assalamu Alaikum, Well I am in the exact same boat as you are.....I have only internet contact with muslims. I have only seen a muslim about 5 times in my entire live and have never talked to them. I did find a mosque about an hour where I live....well I didn't find it, but I heard of it. Now I am too scared to go there. I am afraid of what to say or how to act....I really wish I had someone to go with. So for now I am learning very....very slowly and thinking about Allah all the time because with Allah you are never lonely. Some wise muslim or muslimah told me that once when I was feeling down. Like you I am young and have done a lot of bad things like drugs, drinking, and premarital relations. I gave up everything for Allah because I know that these things will be replaced with even better things Inshaallah. I gave up drugs, drinking, pork, shorts, short sleeved shirts, premarital relations, etc. It hasn't been easy, but it is well worth it. Please try to think of so many of the possitive aspects of Islam that you know about. And yes there are so many things that it seems overwhelming, but take your time. Allah can see in your heart and know what your intentions are. I feel like I am a bad muslimah because I don't pray 5 times a day and I am struggling with Arabic, but I am only human. May what I say keep you close to Allah. As your sister in Islam I am very worried about you and will try to help in any way that I can so please feel free to contact me and I will get back to you InshaAllah. Fe Aman Allah |
| Re: Help!!!!Please!!!!Part 2 |
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| humble_muslim |
| 06/16/01 at 00:42:18 |
| AA There is a large muslim population in Columbia. There have a website at www.almasjid.com. |
| NS |
| Re: Help!!!!Please!!!!Part 2 |
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| bhaloo |
| 06/16/01 at 09:03:39 |
| slm If you go to http://www.islamicfinder.org and type in your zipcode, it will tell you all the Islamic organizations in your area. I just tried it for South Carolina, and here is what it came up with: http://www.islamicfinder.org/locate.php?state=SC&start=0&ziporcity= And like the other brothers and sisters said it takes time to learn everything, so go easy on yourself. A book that I recommend for new Muslims is called, "What Islam is All About" by Yahiya Emerick (he also reverted to Islam, so he knows what the experience is like). You can purchase it from most Islamic bookstores, including http://www.islamicbookstore.com And of course we will all try and help you in any way that we can. |
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