Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| Anonymous |
| 06/27/01 at 13:21:39 |
Assalam-u-Alikum Warehmata Allah wa barakatuh, I am a Muslim sister living in USA. Recently ,I signed for a job for which I have to live away from my family. Which means I have no mehram with me. And I read this hadeeth in Sahih Bukhari which states: Narrated Ibn 'Umar: The Prophet said, "A woman should not travel for more than three days except with a Dhi-Mahram (i.e. a male with whom she cannot marry at all, e.g. her brother, father, grandfather, etc.) or her own husband.)" What I mean to say is that this possibly applies to me too since I live without a mehram. I am so sick of thinking about what I am doing wrong but I have signed a contract for 3 yrs and cannot refuse it now. For ppl who r thinking how my family allowed me to do so,well, Alhamdulillah they trust me and I trust myself to indulge in no wrong. But the Prophet's (PBUH) saying shouldnt be ignored either. Can any of u guys PLZ help me with this???I will be forever grateful to u, InshaAllah. Ma'asalam. |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| kiwi25 |
| 06/27/01 at 15:56:52 |
| salam, hmmmmm anon, i was at an islamic retreat this past week or so and one of the participants asked sheikh mokhtar maghraiou about this, his response was that its ok for a muslim woman to travel any where for the search of knowlegde or just for her own wanting/needing as long as its for sure that she will be safe, whats better is if she can have of course a mahrem, or a group of trusted muslimahs then thats cool too, but going alone is fine because if she only fears Allah(SWT), what is their to worry u noe? i hope inshallah this has helped u some what, wasalam nouha:) |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| amatullah |
| 06/27/01 at 19:40:02 |
| Bismillah and salam, dear sister I don't understand what kind of help do you need with this? You have signed and made a decision. Can you change your mind? if no, then what help? if you can change it then ofcourse it is more important to please Allah. I believe like most scholars say that a woman in Islam shouldn't work unless it is a necessity, and if it is then sister you don't have to go far from your mehrams. Listen to some of the audio lectures. Just last night I listened to Shaikh Omar Abdulkafi in Arabic or Dawud Adib in English, and many others before, say noway to travelling/living alone! even haj which is obligatory you need mahram. I don't agree with the whole they trust and I trust becuase shaitan is clever. And i have seen it happen. It is too much temptation. And Islam is a complete way of life and did't allow us to leave lots of room for him to come in. yes your right the saying of prophet shouldnt be less important in making the decision than all this trust stuff. I swear to you sister a good boy more than barely practicing is now in gold and long hair and talking dirty and a doing drugs. A girl was the highest grades girl i saw with my own eyes begging in the street. I am sure they never in their life thought it would be them either. There is perfect wisdom in sticking to family. Anyway maybe you have a good reason. but as far as i learnt, seeking knowledge and wants don't make it right to go alone distance of whatever is considered travelling to you. I would reconsider if i were you. |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| amatullah |
| 06/27/01 at 22:43:23 |
| Bismillah and salam, I just wanted to say I love you in Allah and I am no better than you if I sounded mean i didn't want to be. It just blows my mind away how many muslims take some things lightly. The most strong in faith is the prophet and he never did things like that or said I trust myself or my daughter so it's ok. And here we are so far away from the truth really..and each one thinks they are doing great in faith as to trust themselves and put themselves at risk. I have seen wallahi what the negative that can happen. Wallahi ukhti it is not worth it when you think of the big picture. |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| Anonymous |
| 06/28/01 at 12:57:10 |
| Assalam u Alikum, Dear brother Amatullah ,I really appreciate what u said and I know as my brother is Islam u want the best for me. The problem is that I didnt think about it when I was doing it but now when I know,I am in deep trouble of mind. I know,I am not the best Muslimah in the world but Alhamdulillah,I know my basic teachings. How I didnt think of this before doing this,I dont know why. May Allah forgive me for what I have done and give me strength to go against this. For trusting myself,I know u r right when u say there is nothing called trusting and stuff cause Allah knows better. I should tell u that I am Alhamdulillah engaged to a very reasonable Muslim person and in no way I would want to get into haraam,May Allah forgive me for doing and saying wrong cause I really dont intend to do it.Also,I am sorry if I offend u ,but these days I am thinking about it a lot and dont know what to do. So,I guess,I should make dua to Allah,who is the most merciful and most beneficient,for belive in these qualities of Allah Almighty.And all of u brothers and sisters,please pray for me too.May Allah guide all of us towards the right path and keep us away from evil and wrong, Ameen.Once again thanks a lot for ur help.Allah will give u ajar-e-a3zeem for this,InshaAllah. Ws'salam. |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| se7en |
| 06/28/01 at 13:27:05 |
| as salaamu alaykum wa rahmatAllah, Kiwi I'm pretty sure br Mokhtar didn't say which of the two opinions *he* subscribed to.. because I was listening for it :) but he did say that there were two legitimate, scholarly opinions. One opinion is that a woman may not travel without a mahrem for more than 2-3 days. This opinion is based on the hadeeth the anonymous sister mentioned. The other opinion says that the reason this legislation was established was because it was dangerous for a sister to travel by herself. So if a sister is assured that she will be secure and safe when traveling, this reason is no longer present and she can therefore travel without a mahrem. I think this opinion also uses the text, "there will come a time when a woman will travel alone from heera (in modern day Iraq) to Makkah not fearing anything but Allah." He also spent a lot of time talking about *why* people travel - for entertainment, to allow them to commit haram they'd be unable to do 'back home'; or in seeking 'ilm, knowledge and livlihood. It is required for women to have maharem at hajj because that is the opinion the Saudi scholars follow. That's not really relevant if you're, say, considering studying in Jordan for a year. so Anonymous, it depends on which opinion you follow. I suggest you get in touch with a local imam and see what he says on this matter. And also think about what decision you'd be most comfortable with in front of Allah. wAllahu 'alam. May Allah guide you in your decision. wasalaamu alaykum. |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| amatullah |
| 06/28/01 at 13:56:14 |
| Bismillah and salam, Anon. my sister, it's ok the prophet saws said "kulu ibni adama kha66a'a wa khairul kha66a'un attaw'boon" Perhaps someone can find its translation please. It means we all sin, but the best of us are the ones who repent. Sub7an Allah I think maybe the answer to your problem came from your reply... why don't you consider to marry the fiance sooner and go together? |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| *sofia* |
| 06/28/01 at 15:42:42 |
| Assalaamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh Hmmnn...I'm not sure but doesn't the issue of "traveling" and "living somewhere" without a mahrem come into play here? I don't mean to complicate things, but surely, there are different rules and regulations that should be applied with complete trust in Allah and hikmah, depending on the situation. I guess that's my concern here, whether or not there is a difference in evaluating "travel" and "living". For example, a female traveling without a mahrem v.s. a female living somewhere permanently without a mahrem. The issue of reasons behind these 2 situations also come into play here... Personally, I see a huge difference between the two, but definitely speak to your local scholar/imam about this to make things clearer (I've heard many different opinions on this) regarding where your situation falls. May Allah guide us all to the decisions that will please Him, and make it easy for us, aameen. |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| jawad |
| 06/29/01 at 00:29:12 |
[quote] Kiwi I'm pretty sure br Mokhtar didn't say which of the two opinions *he* subscribed to.. because I was listening for it :) but he did say that there were two legitimate, scholarly opinions. [/quote] Salaam, In all my years of listening to Br. Mokhtar, I have never heard him ever say which opinion he subscribed to if there have been differing opinions on the subject. If you listen to his lectures again and again (which is unavoidable in my house), you'll notice he is very very careful in his choice of wording. He always says something to the effect of "this opinion is the opinion of most scholars" or "scholars feel this is the more sounder of the opinions" or such, but he avoids giving his own opinion on a subject. Wasalaam, ~jawad |
| NS |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| jannah |
| 06/29/01 at 00:41:01 |
| wlm, true jawad... i think as albanyians we should uphold this principle as well and not say brother mokhtar said this or that and that's the final answer... he doesn't want to be responsible for what we think he said and then spread to others and we don't want to be responsible for it either!! :) so let's be careful and just relate the knowledge he gave to us with the evidence he always uses to back up his words inshallah. |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| kiwi25 |
| 06/29/01 at 10:59:08 |
| salam, im sooo sorry u guys for misusing my words, i didnt mean to start a commotion, but yea anon, ask a local imam and go with what opinion u feel best, wasalam nouha:) |
| Re: I need help [traveling without a mahrem?] |
|---|
| Barr |
| 07/03/01 at 01:28:26 |
| Assalamu'alaikum, Ukhti, with regards to your question, I've asked an ustaz (grad from Al-Azhar)and this is what he said. [color=blue]The ulama has different opinion on this. Syeikh Al-Qardawi opined that women travelling alone or in groups without her mahram is allowed in today's context with condition that the journey is safe and that the destination is not dangerous. The intention is also important. If for education, haj, umrah and silaturrahmi, then it is allowed. There are views from this camp that says that holiday is not something that falls into the category that allows travelling alone. On the other hand, some ulama, especially from Saudi Arabia, forbids women to travel without mahram, whatever her intention is and whereever her destination is. To the extent that they gave the hukum haram for women to drive in a car alone. You may wish to follow either of those two opinions. I can't remember the exact words of the hadith but I remember the gist of it which says that Rasulullah forbids women travelling alone beyond 2 marhalah without any accompanyin (ie. a safe place to live) and she is sure that there is a Muslim Community there. I suggest that U look up Yusuf Qaradawi's fatwa, for more info. Hope this helps, inshaAllah. wallahua'lam :-) |
Individual posts do not necessarily reflect the views of Jannah.org, Islam, or all Muslims. All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective owners. Comments are owned by the poster and may not be used without consent of the author.The rest © Jannah.Org |