Madina Archives

Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board

Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
Anonymous
10/07/01 at 15:35:54
Assalam-u-Alaikum, Al-Hamdulillah, I know a friend who has been coming closer and closer to Islam.  He is a Muslim but like soo many others not as practising as he should be.  He knows well and has good belief about Allah (AWJ) and does seem to feel guilty when he disobeys Allah (AWJ).  He also has Iman in Allah (AWJ), for example he'll come to the masjid more often during exam time while some others would pray even less since they want to study.   I know now that the person is willing to start praying more often and bring a change in his life.  What I would like to know is that how should I approach this situation without making things too difficult for him but at the same time not let him off the hook and give him the false belief that he is a very good Muslim.  Of course the primary concern is to get him to pray 5 times a day. Is it a must for a muslim male to pray in congregation?  After Salah what else should I concentrate on? Does anybody have any experience like this?  I would be very grateful for all your help and Insha-Allah I will keep coming to this therad and read all your messages and give feedback whenever necessary... so please do help. Wassalamu Alaikum, Anon.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
BroHanif
10/09/01 at 18:19:33
[slm] Anon, Inviting people to Allah is a noble deed man. Good on yah for having such worry and concern for a friend. What better friend can there be than one who invites to Allah and his prohet saws ? Good friendship is important as many a times it is through friends that a person becomes closer to Allah or closer to the fire of hell. If you have friends that remind each other of Allah then thats good, othwerwise the friendship can be quite harming for this life and the next. I would say start off slowly by inviting him to Islam in easy steps. For example, if you are to go out and eat then rahter than eating at McDonalds with Ronald McDonald eat at your house by sitting on the floor, washing your hands and following the sunnah. Other examples are keeping a beard, keeping no girlfriends etc etc. If you take small but positive steps that are easy for your friend towards Islam, then insha-allah you his/her imaan will grow. If you both hang out together with your muslim friends then quite surely that influence will rub off your friend and before you know it s/he will be praying 5 times a day. Also give s/he Islamic pressies(hadyas), that way it will increase love between you.   It takes time for people to reform, don't expect people to be in such a desired state overnight, as long as you are there for your friend, make dua and if you always remind s/he of Islam then you won't go wrong.Insha-allah. Take care H

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
Rashid
10/10/01 at 16:46:19
[slm] Alhamdulilah along with the advice already given it is important to spend as mush time as possible with the brother.  In this way you will fulfilling your duty to enjoin the good and forbid the evil.  Whatever he is interested in, make it an opportunity to bring him closer to Allah.  For example a lot of brothers in my community listen to horrible hip hop music with evil lyrics that degrade women, invite to materialism, etc.  First I'll be like "why do you listen to that stuff, it's for losers" or "I want you to say that lyric to your mom"  Then I remove the tape or CD and put one of mines in, of positive or Muslim rappers.  Same thing with books, TV, etc.  Inshallah you will get big rewards for this noble deed. [wlm]

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
Anonymous
10/11/01 at 13:51:55
Assalam-u-Alaikum, Thank you both for replying.  BroHaniff, I agree with you when you say that one should start off with the easy stuff.  But I think asking the brother to grow a beard and start eating on the floor, etc. may be too difficult for a person who is learning.   Particularly here in Pakistan, growing a beard automatically attributes you to Moulvi and tablighi connotations.  Not only that but there is also a parents prob where mom doesnt want her son to grow beard till much older.  This is probably true not only for my friend but for others as well.  People fear ostracioztion from other friends. Another thing is that if I start to bring Islam into every conversation and at all times then that will be too direct.  People will feel that the person doesn't talk abt anythings else and that they are not good enough to be around such a person etc.  I know it's true because tablighis have tried it and not with much success at least not at my uni.   Al-Hamdulillah I do my best to bring Islam in when there is a direct reason to bring the topic in.  For example everybody here knows that I refuse to listen to music and I advise people not to listen to it, but I do not emphasize it very much.  This is becuase what benefit will leaving music bring to a person if he is not even praying. So I come to my point where I think Salah should be the starting point as well non-hypocrisy and sincerity on one's own part.  I've taken some articles on the Importance of Salah from Islaam.com but havent had the time to go through them yet.  Insha-Allah I intend to give these to him in the hope that maybe some knowledge would convince him to pray more regularly.   A book called fadaail e amaal had a very good idea in that it would be a collection of Ahadith regarding the rewards and benefits of particular actions eg Salah, reading the quran, tahajjud, charity etc.  However, I've heard the book contains many weak ahadith and therefore haven't given the book to anybody.  Does anybody know of any other book with a similar subject matter.  Do you all agree with what I have said above?  I am waiting eagerly to hear your suggestions. Wassalamu Alaikum, Anon.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
se7en
10/11/01 at 16:13:02
wa alaykum as salaam wa rahmatAllah, [quote]"I want you to say that lyric to your mom"  [/quote] Heh.. that's a good one :) Company is important.  It might help just to work to move him away from people and situations that make it easier to do wrong.   And you don't have to talk about Islam in every conversation.  (This reminds me of Alaeddin Al-Bakri's speech at ISNA :))  It's more about *doing*.  Call each other up for Fajr, attend a class together at the masjid, hang out with good Muslim ppl.  You don't have to preach.  Just be *available* for preaching when necessary :)  He'll start to ask you questions eventually, if he knows you know what you're talking about and he wants to learn more. Don't criticize him, *especially* in front of other people.  Rasulullah [saw] used to say, "what do you think about the person who does this", instead of reprimanding a person directly.  I think this is really important.  People are sensitive, they just shut off when they think they're being lectured.  Just don't be accusatory. Here's an example of what I'm talking about: Example:  He doesn't wake up for fajr. Don't say:  Why don't you wake up for fajr you fool? Something you could say:  I was reading this article on the the Day of Judgement yesterday.. man it was really scary, that really affected me.  You know the first thing we're gonna be asked about is our prayer?  That's the first thing ALLAH is going to look at.  And the article said, if you're defecient in that, you're going to be defecient in everything else.  Man, just thinking about that makes it so much easier to wake up for fajr, you know?  Yeah, it's hard, but if you think about it?  It's so worth it man. Just some suggestions :) wasalaamu alaykum.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
Asim
10/11/01 at 23:13:11
Assalaamu alaikum, Having gone through college in Pakistan, I would say the best way to help your friend is to be with him, do things together, and discuss issues together. Don't talk Islam this Islam that all the time but rather the teachings should come from the choices you make, from the activities you perform, and from the discussions you have. Many young ppl in Pakistan know the theory very well, But they are apathetic and have a I-don't-care or what-good-is-it attitude. Develop a group of pious friends to hang out with. Do fun activities together. For example, instead of hanging out at bazaars get involved in some sports. The other important thing is a regular dose of knowledge that reinforces and reminds. And I think  printing short articles is a good idea. Leave them around or discuss them in your group. Go to jumuah or other lectures as a group. Avoid getting into philosophical debates (Pakistani's are often fond of this with no net benefit), and that is why articles from islaam.com would be great. And pray for him also. Be patient with him and inshallah your efforts would bring a change in him for the better. wasalaam.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
momineqbal
10/12/01 at 03:34:31
[slm], "Let us be muslims" By Maulana Maududi (Translation by Khurshid Ahmad I think) is a good book to read. Covers the basic pillars of Islam and exhorts muslims to be true to them. It had a very positive effect on me Alhamdulillah. Another thing is that a *strong* Iman is really really important. And strong Iman is a result of sound knowledge. Without it there is always doubt within our own hearts and mind. I dont know about pakistan, but living in a non-muslim country I faced with a situation where most people somehow have compartmentalized religion in their lives and think its outdated and many muslims have been at least partially influenced by this attitude. To be educated almost always means going away from religion. So instead of our best talents going to religious schools the rejects of the mainstream educational system end up there.  For non-muslims getting away from their respective religions' fallacy has led to their advancement in certain fields, but for us muslims getting away from our religion , more specifically the Quran has pushed us back and we appear backward to the rest of the world. To get aware about Islam more and its applicability in all times and situations etc. had good influence on me. Also some debates between muslim speakers and non-muslim speakers had positive influence on me. Islam's relationship with science and awareness of Islamic histroy also had positive influence. Wassalam Eqbal

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
taueeya
10/12/01 at 21:49:42
Assalamu Alaikum!            [quote]Avoid getting into philosophical debates (Pakistani's are often fond of this with no net benefit), [/quote]        Well-noticed point br. Asim :). People, there in Pakistan, usually are either 'deluded' that whatever they are 'thinking' about Islam, is Islam, or whatever knowledge they have from whatever source, is correct and sufficient and they dont need any further knowledge about Islam (Astaghfirullah). Unfortunately, they also have every reason to justify their condition in terms that they dont have time or money for this. Wallahu 'Alam. I'll try to write something on this topic, InshaAllah, as I get time and arrange my thoughts on this to write as concisely as possible. Wassalam.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
blissfull
10/13/01 at 12:38:52
slm People 'here' in Pakistan do not All fall under the same bracket.  i could say people over 'there', have thier own agendas as well. i think we should start to remove our thoughts of generalisation. These tragic events have led to a mass awaking in the hearts of our Muslim brothers and sisters. The way we do Dawah, as Hamza Yusuf and other Shayks,Imams and Scholars, are saying to us with the same messages in different words. i truly believe, the way we speak(lingo) act(attitude) listen(to the inner of ourselfs,the whisperings of shaytan,the outer macro cosm). we can start by a drop which makes an ocean. for the original question of the brother, all the above suggestions are Alhamdulilah superb. the only thing i would add to that is brother, have no apprehensions or fears of trying to guide someone for it is ALLAH(SWT) that guides the seeker. and also guides the seekers guide.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
taueeya
10/15/01 at 01:54:38
Assalamu Alaikum,      [quote]People 'here' in Pakistan do not All fall under the same bracket.  i could say people over 'there', have thier own agendas as well. [/quote]       My mistake! I should have mentioned it that I do not mean to generalize but that its the majority there that lacks the understanding to understand Islam. The minority, however, does understand what Islam is. I used the word 'there' for comparison with the practicing Muslims here in States but I will try to avoid using it in future (InshaAllah). So, please, lets not make it an issue of 'here and there' because I fully understand that since this WTC incident, All the Muslims of the world(particularly the ones in Afghanistan) are going through one of the toughest times and it is not the time to call ourselves as 'Pakistanis' or 'Americans', not even the time to call ourselves as 'Muslim from Pakistan' or 'Muslim from America' but to call ourselves "MUSLIMS" only. May Allah(Swt) guide us all to the right path and protect us all from fitnah (Ameen). JAzaak Allahu khair. Wassalam.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
blissfull
10/15/01 at 08:09:55
slm JazakALLAHkhier brother for the explanation and indeed i jumped the gun as well,for i should have had more patience and understood what you really meant.  may ALLAH swt bring us all closer to what is real.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
Anonymous
10/16/01 at 11:18:05
Assalam-u-Alaikum, Jazzakum ullahu Khair for all your suggestions. All of your suggestions are Al-Hamdulillah useful.  I particularly liked Br. Asim's article group discussion idea... with a little work that just *might* work.  I can't do everything that you suggested because there just aren't enough pious (or even moderately pious) people here.   And that's another reason I thank Allah (AWJ) that jannah.org exists! However, I'm still looking for a Fadaail e Amal substitute.   Again thank you all. Wassalam-u-Alaikum, Anon.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
momineqbal
10/16/01 at 21:12:08
[slm], Try Riyadhus-Saleheen and 40 Ahadeeth by Imam Nawawi (translation of Riyadhus-Saleheen I have is published in Karachi!). Riyadhus-Saleheen has ahadeeth listed by topic and its a good starting point because the book (in 2 vol) is short and concise and a good reading if you want to sit together and read a portion of it regularly. I also suggest that on the lines of group discussions you could also have weekly Quranic study circle in which someone could prepare to read ayat from the Quran together with lessons learnt etc. A good tafseer would be helpful in preparation inshaAllah. Wassalam Eqbal

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
taueeya
10/17/01 at 01:11:53
Assalamu Alaikum,   [quote]However, I'm still looking for a Fadaail e Amal substitute[/quote]       Since almost every book has its own importance, I am not sure actually, which book can be a substitute for Fadaail-e-Amal, but I would recommend u to read books by Maulana Maududi( as a brother from the board recommended me to read them and gifted me one with the name 'Khutbaat'). They are easily available in the market and Maulana Maududi has written a number of books on various topics.      [quote]Try Riyadhus-Saleheen and 40 Ahadeeth by Imam Nawawi (translation of Riyadhus-Saleheen I have is published in Karachi!). Riyadhus-Saleheen has ahadeeth listed by topic and its a good starting point because the book (in 2 vol) is short and concise and a good reading if you want to sit together and read a portion of it regularly. [/quote]         There are 2 differnt issues of Riyad-us-Saliheen, one with commentary and other without commentary, so try to get the ones that have commentary also. InshaAllah, that shall help u. Wassalam.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
Anonymous
10/17/01 at 20:22:49
this is pretty good advice. i definitely secnod the "NO PREACHING" idea. i am a muslim and every time my friends get together, and it turns into a session of picking a random hadith, passing a fatwa, and back biting whoever doesn't follow this or that - or accusing someone there, in however a sly manner of being somehow deficient - i get so turned off. i find an over emphasis on forbidden and disliked things makes me highly grumpy. it's like people tell non muslims how liberating and wonderful islam is, but once you're among muslims, it's all about the misery of it all, and restrictions. we need to change this attitude. even being around a pleasant muslim who performs his or her obligations can have a huge effect. makes you feel like it's normal and respectable to be muslim. makes you proud to see what others do. be a positive influence - the importance of this shouldn't be underestimated.

Re: Bringing a Muslim closer to Islam?
Anonymous
10/18/01 at 16:24:52
Assalamu Alaikum, The amazing thing is that the articles I printed seemed to have benefitted me far more than I thought htey would!  Subhan Allah. Anyway, I have this really cool book called "Men Around the Messenger" and I'm thinking I could start with that in the study circle idea.   Please make dua' that whatever efforts are done over here (or anywhere) by anybody result in positive impacts on the Muslims.  Far too often I get deluded, thinking that it's me who can get the job done whereas no one can get hidaya except by the will of Allah (AWJ).  So please make room in your dua' for all Muslims to becoming sincere and effective dai's. On a different note I'd like to amend something I said earlier.  I said that there are not many pious people around me here at uni (in Pakistan).  This may sound like I'm saying that it doesn't make a difference where you go for uni since the level of Islam would be the same.  This is not true, and you will definitely get a much better atmosphere at a uni in Pakistan than a uni in the US or europe, for example.  However, I don't know much abt what its like in places like UAE and Egypt (where there may really be no difference, Wallahu 'Alam).  Just wanted to clear up things. Jazzakum ullahu Khair, Wassalam-u-Alaikum, Anon.
Individual posts do not necessarily reflect the views of Jannah.org, Islam, or all Muslims. All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective owners. Comments are owned by the poster and may not be used without consent of the author. The rest © Jannah.Org