Random questions

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Random questions
Serena

10/22/01 at 19:02:45

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu.

I pray all of you are in the best of health and iman! :)

Just a few questions that have come to mind recently -

1. If a woman has a female doctor during labor and delivery, must she wear her scarf?

2. In Islam, is there such a thing as soul mates?

3. If something bad happens to you, and you know that it was pre-decreed by Allah ta'ala and you accept that, do you still have a right to react to it emotionally? I mean, can you be angry, hurt, upset, etc.? Why do so many people just say that it was written for you and that you should move on?

4. Can a single woman who has a son nearing the age of seven, and knows of another couple who have a son the same age who attends the Masjid with his father, and the father has offered to take her son for her, (should she) allow him to go with them, even though they are not related? (Whew, hope that makes sense! )

note: It's so that her son can join in with the (younger) Brothers’ activities, soccer games and socialize with other Muslim boys.

5. Is it appropriate for a woman to travel a few hours out of town to attend Islamic classes, by herself, if she has no Mahram?

6. In Ramadan, if you have been told by your doctor that you should *not* fast because it may endanger your health, yet you feel that you would be okay, can you still fast? If not, what are some of the things you can do during Ramadan to make up for it?

7. Can a single woman hire a moving company to move her belongings to another town if the movers are men? What if she has no other choice?

8. If a fellow Muslim committed a crime against you (a felony), would you turn him in to the Kuffar police or would you contact an Imam to get advice on what to do? What if by turning him in, he, in return, threatened to harm you?

More to come, insha'Allah...

Take care all,

Serena :-)

Re: Random questions
Mystic

10/22/01 at 22:00:03

beauty
serenades
and
i
yearn
for
bliss

remembrances
crooon
and
i
say
to
YES
just
BLESS

i
always
loved
me
and
princess
said
yes

i
tried
differrent
degreeeeeesssssssssssss
and
energy
continued
to
BLESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss

we
reverberate
our
decree
and
decree
says
???

so
we
fulfill
the
term
learn
to
yearn
and
stress
becomes
manifest.....

in
the
scorching
deserts
of
MAKKAHHHHHH
seek
Madinahhhhh's
beautiful
nest

niceness
occurs
not
randomly
its
the
fullness
of
YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i
seek
energy
to
soften
to
melt
to
distort
to
contort
to
lie
to
begin
to
end
to
be
to
love
to
know
to
understand
to
yearn
to
twist
to
be
to
help
to
aweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

and
never
say
anything
else........................

cosmic
silence
regenerates
my
dying
depths

sunshine
helps
me
manifest

therefore
i
always
go
round
and
around

may
be
the
hornet's
nest...........................................................

we
are
we
bow
we
stand
we
raise
we
build
we
seek
we
yearn
we
sigh
we
call
we
hear
we
see
we
ask
and
then
wait
and
wait
and
praise
and
groooowwwww

life
is
nice.

Allah
is
AWESSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

and
i
love
me
and
you
always

so
lets
out
step
this
very
test..............................................................

Re: Random questions
Arsalan

10/23/01 at 01:42:14

[quote]Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu.[/quote]Wa'alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh!

[quote]1. If a woman has a female doctor during labor and delivery, must she wear her scarf? [/quote]Yes. As long as she will not be seen without her hijaab by strange men.

[quote]2. In Islam, is there such a thing as soul mates?[/quote]Not sure what this means.

[quote]3. If something bad happens to you, and you know that it was pre-decreed by Allah ta'ala and you accept that, do you still have a right to react to it emotionally? I mean, can you be angry, hurt, upset, etc.? Why do so many people just say that it was written for you and that you should move on? [/quote]What is not allowed is complaining and saying things like "I don't deserve what is happening to me" or "why does it have to be me?" It is allowed, however, to acknowledge to other people that you are in pain and going through hardship. Statements like, "this is really tough for me" or "I'm going through a very tough time" are acceptable. What is *best* is to be completely patient, however, and simply say "alhamdulillah." This is a very tough thing to do, and is called "sabrun jameel."

[quote]4. Can a single woman who has a son nearing the age of seven, and knows of another couple who have a son the same age who attends the Masjid with his father, and the father has offered to take her son for her, (should she) allow him to go with them, even though they are not related? (Whew, hope that makes sense! )

note: It's so that her son can join in with the (younger) Brothers’ activities, soccer games and socialize with other Muslim boys.[/quote]This question doesn't make sense to me. What is wrong with a seven year old boy going with his friend (who is also a seven year old boy) and his friend's father to the Masjid?

[quote]5. Is it appropriate for a woman to travel a few hours out of town to attend Islamic classes, by herself, if she has no Mahram?[/quote]There is some difference of opinion on this. Check [url=http://www.islam-qa.com]Islam-Q&A[/url]

[quote]6. In Ramadan, if you have been told by your doctor that you should *not* fast because it may endanger your health, yet you feel that you would be okay, can you still fast? If not, what are some of the things you can do during Ramadan to make up for it?[/quote]Hmm. I have a gut feeling about this one, but I'd rather not say it! Check Islam-Q&A again :)

[quote]7. Can a single woman hire a moving company to move her belongings to another town if the movers are men? What if she has no other choice?[/quote]As long as she will not be in a situation where she is alone with the men, it should be ok insha Allah. Otherwise, she should ask someone from the community to be present while the movers do their work.

[quote]8. If a fellow Muslim committed a crime against you (a felony), would you turn him in to the Kuffar police or would you contact an Imam to get advice on what to do? What if by turning him in, he, in return, threatened to harm you?[/quote]Depends on the seriousness of the crime. If it's too serious, I'd turn him in to the legal authorities. If it's something minor, and it's likely that contacting the imam would remedy the problem, then I would contact the imam.

Wallahu a'lam.

Wassalamu alaikum.
Re: Random questions
M.F.

10/23/01 at 08:09:09

Soulmates:
In my personal and humble opinion, soulmates do exist. Allah created everything in pairs, and I believe that he did the same for men and women, I almost feel like there are people who were created for each other, like Adam and Hawwa.
If it's soulmates who are of the same gender, I think they exist too, because the Prophet (S) said something like: If I were allowed to have a Khaleel (very close friend) other than Allah I would have had Abu Bakr as my khaleel.

Wearing scarf:
I don't see why a woman would have to wear a scarf around a female doctor if there's no men around, esp. during childbirth!!

For fasting against doctor's orders, I think that it depends if the negative health consequenses you were warned about are long term or short term. You might feel able to fast but in the long term it would be harmful for you. Also, I don't think a doctor would recommend that you not fast unless it were really necessary. If a doctor told me (again, my personal opinion) not to fast cause it would put me in danger, I wouldn't.
You can give Sadaqa, and of course you might be able to make the fast up later on.
If a Muslim committed a felony against me that hurt me or made me think he could hurt someone else I'd definitely turn him in to the police.
Travelling:
I don't think there's anything wrong with travelling for a few hours by oneself.
Wallahu A'lam!

Re: Random questions
tq

10/23/01 at 08:36:27

Assalamo elikuim

1. If a woman has a female doctor during labor and delivery, must she wear her scarf?
On this I agree with Sister MF.
Sister you are in Sacramento, right? There is a clinic there where all the doctors,nurses even the receptionist are female – so even if your doctor is not on call when you have to go the hospital, you can be sure that a female doctor and staff will be on call. I think the name is “Clinic for Women by women” or something (It has been a long time :) ) If you need the name and address let me know I will look in my stuff. I highly recommend them!

7. Can a single woman hire a moving company to move her belongings to another town if the movers are men? What if she has no other choice?

I don’t know what is the ruling on this but I think everything is based on intention also usually the moving company sends more than one person so it is not as if you are going to be alone with any”one” .When I moved (my husband couldn’t come because of work) I left the main door open when movers came to pack and move stuff ,also most of the time when they were there I was in other room packing myself – luckly there was a female also with them.

Wasalam
tq

Re: Random questions
Hania

10/23/01 at 13:55:40

Wa alaikum salam wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh Sis Serena

[quote]

1. If a woman has a female doctor during labor and delivery, must she wear her scarf? [/quote]

I'm assuming this question is directed towards the woman in labour
and not the Doctor. I personally do not think she must wear a scarf because even if she was to keep her hair hidden something much more personal and initmate would be exposed to eveyone else in the labour room. My sister just had a baby 6 months ago 'fat baby', and my sister said the labour pain were so excrutiatingly painful, the pain was beyond description (yes its 100X more painful than a paper cut!!), and during the pain you don't care what you look like, whose watching, what you're wearing or not wearing, all you care about is getting the thing that is causing so much pain out! She describes the experience as a terrible case of constipation (can any other mothers backup this experience up?).

I considered adoption after my sisters decription but after seeing 'fat baby' she convinced me the to be blessed with a cute baby is one of the most precious gifts she has ever received. Allhamdulliah, MashaAllah :)

[quote]
2. In Islam, is there such a thing as soul mates? [/quote]

If this question means is there an ideal partner out there for everyone then I think there is. Sadly with the number of divorce's/seperations not everyone will be lucky to find their sole mate in this lifetime. Right now after I pray, I always ask Allah to guide me to a good husband who will be my sole mate - oh my goodness I can't believe I admitted this on the board, I'm so embarrased :D

(He is) the Creator of the heavens and the earth:
He has made for you pairs from among yourselves
and pairs among cattle: by this means does
He multiply you! There is nothing whatever like
unto Him, and He is the one that hears and
sees (all things). (Quran 42:11)

I'm reading a book on Prophet Muhammad's (pbuh) life. And I just read about the special relationship between Prophet(pbuh) and Khadija (may Allah bless her) and my eyes just welled up, they adored each other. They seem like perfect sole mates.

[quote]
3. If something bad happens to you, and you know that it was pre-decreed by Allah ta'ala and you accept that, do you still have a right to react to it emotionally? I mean, can you be angry, hurt, upset, etc.? Why do so many people just say that it was written for you and that you should move on? [/quote]

I think you can react emotionally. After all we are human beings and its in our nature. But its better to move on so that you don't dwell on misfortune and become bitter and depressed. Depression can mean you loose faith and hope in everything and could lead to suicide! Best thing to do is accept it as a test from Allah and be patient and wait until the test is over. Each test maybe infact be something very good for you. So don't blame Allah or be angry at Allah.Allah knows best.

'By the full morn,
by the night when it grows still,
your Lord has not bid you farewell nor does he loath you,
and for the eternal life you shall have better than the temporal,
And your Lord will give you to make you content.
Has he not found you fatherless and given you a home?
Has he not found you astray and guided you?
Has he not found you dependent and made you independent (Quran 91:1.8)

[quote]
5. Is it appropriate for a woman to travel a few hours out of town
to attend Islamic classes, by herself, if she has no Mahram? [/quote]

Hmmmmmmm I'm not sure about this but I am sure a lot of sisters
on this board go to school, university, work, islamic talks on
their own. While you travel you're not going to get upto anything naughty are you?

[quote]
7. Can a single woman hire a moving company to move her belongings to
another town if the movers are men? What if she has no other choice?
[/quote]

Well whether it is Islamic or not I'd still ask a friend to be present while the moving company was around. Gas men/women, electric men/women, salesmen/women etc, you hear so many stories nowadays of bogus people that enter the homes of little old ladies/the vunerable and, hit them over the head with their rolling pins and hide
them underneath the floorboards with a rug on top. Better to be safe.

Allah Hafiz and thanks for posting the questions Sis Serena, I certainly enjoyed reading them :)
Hania

Re: Random questions
Jenna

10/23/01 at 21:23:04

~~~
She describes the experience as a terrible case of constipation (can any other mothers backup this experience up?).
~~~
[wlm]

LOL! Yes when I gave birth to my son it felt like passing a watermelon! LOL! Yet I would go through all of the pain again!!! It was the most BEAUTIFUL expereince ever!!! Allahu Akbar!! :) :) :)

That is exactly how it felt to me. LOL Is it alright to say that lol

Jenna :-) :-) :-)

Re: Random questions
Arsalan

10/23/01 at 22:58:53

[slm]

I messed up in my reply to Question 1.[quote]Yes. As long as she will not be seen without her hijaab by strange men.[/quote]That should say: *No* As long as she will not be seen without her hijaab by strange men.

Re: Random questions
se7en

10/23/01 at 23:44:56

wa alaykum as salaam wa rahmatAllah,

I think that's probably more answers than you need :)

We had a discussion on traveling without a mahrem a while back, you can check it out [url=http://www.jannah.org/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl/YaBB.pl?board=madrasa&action=display&num=3690]here[/url].

It is soo interesting to read people's opinions about soulmates. Do y'all really think that there is *one* particular person on the planet that's perfect for you? Or do you mean.. Allah allows for you to meet, at some time in your life, that one person that would be khayr for you? Maybe I'm a cynic, but I don't know about that..

And the giving birth descriptions.. :o I'm gonna be extra nice to my Mom, inshaAllah.

wasalaamu alaykum wa rahmatAllah :)
Re: Random questions
kiwi25

10/24/01 at 00:21:48

salam,

hmm some of your questions need serious pondering, and maybe some should go to your local imam.

after reading all of your anwers to number one, i want to say that for a muslim woman, she should try to get doctors that are:

1) muslim women, if not
2) a women, if not
3) a man, if not
4) .....well i think she'll be most likely able to get any of the first three before the forth.

alhumdulilah we live in a society where there are female doctors and double alhumdulilah that there are muslim female doctors. but in a case where it concerns someones health, esp child bearing, than it is ok for even a man to see her. but ONLY health wise and ONLY if there is no female doctor /nurse present at all.

we know that in islam, after one has reached the age of seven,(Serena, is this where you got question four from?) we cannot see them naked except for doctors because it is a health reason.

mashallah Jenna, its amazing to see someone so enthusiastic about child birth

hmmm question number two:

soul mates? hmm i dont noe but think about this question?

is it ok to say to a loved one "we were made for each other" well personally i think no, its not and the reason is because there is an ayah in the quran that reads,

" wa ma khalaqtul jinnah wal insa illa liya boodoon"
"and I have not created the jinn and human only for my worship"

question three:

thats a good question, i dont noe if u have every heard of this but when a loved one dies, and we weep, they feel sorrow and it is a great burden on them if we weep. (what i mean by weep are those extreme weeps with loud sobs etc)

the reason is because we are all going to die sooner or later.

hmm i dont noe if what i just said relates to the question, maybe it does somehow, but ask your local imam

number four:
my answer would be the same as arsalan's. it seems that there is no harm intended.

number five:
we've had this discussion before, i think we came to the conclusion to ask your local imam

number six:

im answering this one from my own expereince:

i am a diabetic and have been so for most of my life time, since childhood. so i wasnt able to start fasting at the age of seven when every other of my muslim freinds were. the doctor would not allow it

it was until i was about 14/15 when i was able to fast. me and my doctor had talked about what things i can do to fast. so here i am my fisrt day fasting, everythings going great until a few days later when my health just couldnt take it anymore, so i had to stop.

i think one should take their doctor serious when it comes to health. at this moment, i am able to fast only a few days and not consecutively.

as for making up my fast,
u make iftar for others,
u free three (or is it ten) slaves, kinda hard doing that while living here....

number seven:

hmmm, interesting question, i really dont noe how to answer this one

question eight:

thats definetly an imam question

inshallah i helped you, if anything i wrote was wrong in islam, may Allah(SWT) forgive me, and if i offended anyone, forgive me please

wasalam,

nouha:)

Re: Random questions
se7en

10/24/01 at 08:39:51

as salaamu alaykum,

Just wanted to add something...

[quote]If something bad happens to you, and you know that it was pre-decreed by Allah ta'ala and you accept that, do you still have a right to react to it emotionally? I mean, can you be angry, hurt, upset, etc.? [/quote]

There's a beautiful story* of Rasulullah [saw], who was found weeping after his son had died. His companions asked, are you crying out of dislike of Allah's decree?

He said, these tears are not in dislike of Allah's decree. They are tears of a father who has lost his son.

I love this story. It shows us that human emotion is not something Allah wants us to extinguish. Feelings of hurt, anguish, despair - these are normal, human emotions, especially in response to some of the challenges and difficulties Allah tests us with. There's nothing wrong with these feelings - but what we do with them, how we work with them, is what is important.

This is where sabr comes into play. All too often we use the term just to refer to not losing our patience. But a big part of sabr is how we face these tests that Allah decrees for us.

There are actually levels of sabr. The first level is when you don't complain outwardly about a hardship - but inside you hate it. It takes a lot of inner strength to control yourself externally when these emotions are turbulent inside, and because of that, your struggle to control your tongue and your limbs from acting out violently will be rewarded.

A higher level of sabr is when, after dealing with the initial surge of emotions that result from a difficult experience, you don't feel that turmoil inside, you don't *hate* that this has happening to you. Because you know that Allah purifies you through hardships, and that Allah will only do to an 'abd what is best for them.

The next level of sabr is the *highest* level, the most difficult to achieve. It is sabrun jameel - literally, the most beautiful and excellent of sabr. I heard it described very beautifully -- it's facing a bitter test, with a smile on your face.

This is when, if a hardship befalls you, you literally feel ridhaa - comfort and satisfaction. You're *grateful* for it, because you understand that this test is only a purification and an opportunity for spiritual elevation. This is the type of person who is able to look *through* an event and it's difficulties, to realize the consequence of it in the long run.

That takes *a lot*, in terms of yaqeen, inner strength, eman. But it's something we should strive for.

[quote]Why do so many people just say that it was written for you and that you should move on? [/quote]

I think we're just careless with each other. It's really easy to tell someone that they should stop being so emotional about things, to acknowledge that everything is in the Hands of Allah and they should come to accept that -- but we can't turn off our emotions. We're not built that way. We are built to feel pain, hurt, betrayal, despair. It's part of what makes us human. And this is part of what mujahida is -- an internal struggle to submit ourselves whole heartedly to what Allah had decreed for us. That's the jihad of the everyday. Not something to be taken lightly, or easily dismissed.

wAllahu a'lam.

wasalaamu alaykum.

* This is my (very loose) recollection of the story.
Re: Random questions
proudtobemuslim

10/24/01 at 04:19:23

Assalamu Alaikum,

Islam qa contradicts itself with regards to the hijab question:

Question:

I have heard that a kaffir woman id forbidden to look at a muslim woman
withpu her hijab. Is this applicable to my mother-inlaw who is an
unbeliever

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

1.The scholars differed concerning the ruling on whether
Muslim women can take off their hijaab in front of
non-Muslim women, because they differed in their
interpretation of the aayah in Soorat al-Noor (interpretation of
the meaning):

“… and not to reveal their adornment except to their
husbands… or their women…” [al-Noor 24:31].

There are three views concerning the Tafseer of this
phrase:

1.That it means Muslim women;

2.That it means all women, Muslim and non-Muslim;

3.That it means Muslim women preferably but this is not
binding.

1.The more correct view – and Allaah knows best – is that it is
permissible for a Muslim woman to appear (without hijaab) in
front of a kaafir woman, unless she fears that the woman
may describe her to her husband or to any other stranger
(non-mahram man). In that case she has to keep her hijaab
on in front of that woman. There is no difference between a
kaafir woman and a corrupt Muslim woman in this case.

2.Among the evidence (daleel) that it is permissible to take off
hijaab in front of a kaafir woman is the hadeeth of ‘Aa’ishah
(may Allaah be pleased with her) in which she mentions that
a Jewish woman came in to see her and said, “May Allaah
protect you from the torment of the grave…” (Narrated by
al-Bukhaari, 1007; Muslim, 584).

Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on
him) said:

“It is not obligatory to wear hijaab in front of them –
non-Muslim women – because they are like all other women
according to the more correct of the two scholarly views.”

(Fataawaa al-Mar’ah al-Muslimah, 2/582).

3.What the Muslim woman can uncover in front of a kaafir
woman is the same as what she can uncover in front of her
mahrams, i.e., the places of adornment or the places of
wudoo’.

Shaykh Muhammad Saalih ibn ‘Uthaymeen said: “In
front of her mahrams she can uncover her face, head,
neck, hands, forearms, feet and calves, and she should
cover everything else.”

(Fataawaa al-Mar’ah al-Muslimah, 1/417).

And Allaah knows best.

Fataawaa al-Mar’ah al-Muslimah, 1/417
(www.islam-qa.com)

AND ELSEWHERE....

What is the role of Islam regarding hejab muslim women infront of non
muslim women ,and is it allowed for non muslim women to cut muslim
women's hair?

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Allaah says about the Muslim woman’s hijaab (interpretation of
the meaning): “… and not to reveal their adornment except to
their husbands, their fathers, their husbands’ fathers, their sons,
their husbands’ sons, their brothers or their brothers’ sons, or
their sisters’ sons, or their women…” [al-Noor 24:31]

The scholars differ as to whether kaafir women are included in the
phrase “or their women”. The aayah gives Muslim women
permission to remove their hijaab in front of “their women”. Some
scholars say that the pronoun hinna (their) is referring to specific
people, otherwise there would be no need to be so specific.
Al-Qurtubi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, “Or their
women means the Muslim women… it excludes the mushrik
women whether they are of ahl al-dhimmah (non-Muslims living
peacefully under Islamic rule) or others. It is not permitted for a
believing woman to uncover any of her body in front of a mushrik
woman unless she is a slave belonging to her.” (Al-Jaami’ li Ahkaam
al-Qur’aan, 12/233). Ibn Katheer said something similar in his
Tafseer.

This is the opinion of the Hanafis, Maalikis and Shaafa’is, and is
one of two opinions narrated from Imaam Ahmad, may Allaah
have mercy on him. Some of the scholars thought that the pronoun
in the phrase or their women did not mean that Muslim women
should take off their hijaab in front of Muslim women but not
mushrik and kaafir women. This is the correct view of the
Hanbalis. They said: The phrase or their women applies to all
women, and the pronoun hinna was added because of the context
and pattern of the passage, which mentions their fathers, their
sons, etc. So the pronoun is added to make this word match the
others.

The majority of scholars say that it is forbidden for a kaafir
woman to look at a Muslim woman without hijaab, and this is the
most correct interpretation of the aayah. If all women were meant,
the aayah would have read “or the women (in general)”, but what
it actually says is “or their women.” There is no word or phrase in
the Qur’aan that does not carry a specific meaning, and there is no
evidence to support the idea that the pronoun is only there to make
the word match the pattern of the rest of the passage. And Allaah
knows best.

Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com)

This is of course withe regards to general circumstances rather than childbirth where far more than just the hair would be exposed.

Wassalam-u-Alaikum,
Uzer

Re: Random questions
farah

10/27/01 at 13:38:29

As salaamu alaikum --

<<you hear so many stories nowadays of bogus people that enter the homes of little old ladies/the vunerable and, hit them over the head with their rolling pins and hide them underneath the floorboards with a rug on top. Better to be safe.>>

*gasp*

Where is this happening? :-)

Pearl

Re: Random questions
explorer

10/28/01 at 14:50:11

[slm]

[i]6. In Ramadan, if you have been told by your doctor that you should *not* fast because it may endanger your health, yet you feel that you would be okay, can you still fast? If not, what are some of the things you can do during Ramadan to make up for it? [/i]

http://www.qss.org/articles/ramadan/5.html

The Pregnant and breast-feeding women
If they fear for the baby, can break the fast and pay the fidyah (ransom). They do not have to make up the days missed according to one opinion of scholars.

The Prophet (S) said to one of his companions (*): "Come, I shall inform you about the fast. Allah, the Blessed and Most High, remitted half the prayer for the traveler, and fasting for the pregnant and breast-feeding" .[at-Tirmithi, Ibn Majah, Abu Dawud and an-Nasa'i, Sahih] (*) Anas Ibn Malik al-Ka`bee who is different than Anas the servant of the Prophet (S).

Abu Dawud related from 'Ikrimah that Ibn 'Abbas said concerning the ayah "And form those who can fast [but do not],": "This is a concession for the elderly, as they can fast. They are to break the fast and feed a poor person a day. Pregnant or breast-feeding women, if they fear for the child, can do likewise." [al-Bazzar]. At the end of the report, there is the addition: "Ibn 'Abbas used to say to his wives who were pregnant: 'You are in the same situation as those who can fast [but do not]. You are to pay the "ransom" and, do not have to make up the days later."' [ad-Daraqutni also mentions it]

Of Souls and Mates
Barr

10/31/01 at 08:48:24

Assalamu'alaikum :-)

Just sharing smt I learnt not too long ago, inshaAllah… that made me quite.. hmmm. subhanallah.. just simply awed with the signs of Allah, MashaAllah :)

[quote]In Islam, is there such a thing as soul mates? [/quote]

Each of us is unique. We are made up of the jasad (body), ruh (spirit/soul), aql (intellect/mind), nafs (desires) and the qalb (heart). The qalb is the decision maker, that is influenced by our aql and nafs, which is then, manifested by the jasad and ruh.

If our qalb is pure, brimming with iman, then, we would see things with the eye of our qalb, we would decide and discern which is haq (truth) and which is baatil (falsehood), and choose the right and guided choice, inshaALlah.

But things are not so simple, in a human being… there would be conflicts and interaction between these factors before the heart makes the decision, and for the jasad and ruh to carry it out.

As such, these factors that make us, come at different levels for each of us, we have our own thoughts and intelligence, our own behaviour, characteristics and peculiarities and our body shapes and sizes are different too. And so is the level and purity of our ruh would differ. For each of us, is our very own person.

When 2 individuals get married, each with their own individuality and differences, and within them, the interaction between these factors… logic tells that things can get a bit chaotic. Yet, amidst all that, when Allah puts love in our hearts, with peace and tranquillity in our homes, that is when we’ll be able to see and feel the sign of Allah.

[color=blue]“And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity (sakinah) with them, and He has put love (mawaddah) and mercy (rahmah) between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.” Surah Ar-Rum:21 [/color]

For marriage is not a union of just 2 bodies, but a union of 2 souls, each, a partner, comforter and supporter to another.

When Allah mentioned, He puts mawaddah between us and our spouses, the mufasirun interpreted this to be love, with the element of intimate relations (sex) between a couple. For intimate relations help develop the love between 2 people bonded by marriage… for not only is it an action of 2 bodies, but also, a union of 2 souls… something that is spiritual as well. That is why, it is very important that the du’a is recited, and the adab of having intimate relations with our spouses are followed… the satisfaction and beauty felt between both would strengthen the love between those 2 souls.. such that as time passes, and the feature of sex ceases to exist, what is left would still be love… but love that encompasses mercy and tenderness ie. rahmah. Mawaddah and Rahmah, of course, can co-exist in a couple… but this love is only given to those bound by the purity of marriage.. for there lies barakah (blessings). The growth of each of our ruhs in this union, drawing closer to each other and to the One that brought us together… would further fortify the love and tranquility between these 2 people.

For, when there is a connection and bond of these 2 ruhs, and the joining of 2 hearts... then, it would be difficult for it to be separated easily… adjustments between eah other, challenges conquered together, and a life built together, would fuse these 2 souls… but it is something that needs a lot of hard work for both of them… so that this ni’mah would not be taken away, inshaAllah.

Someone once told me… if we pay for peanuts, we’ll only get peanuts… but if we pay for gold… we’ll get gold… inshaAllah.

And hence, to your question dear sister.. yes, I think there are soulmates for each of us…..inshaAllah.

Sorry for the long answer.. but I just felt the need to share.. coz, I once did not see it that way… the tafsir of that ayat.. is so… subhanallah… I think only those who have gone through it would feel the a portion of the majestic signs of Allah, mashaAllah. While others... perhaps can only read about it...

Allahua’lam
:::Barr:::

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