Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| PuNkYHiJaBi |
| 10/31/01 at 14:18:51 |
| salaam u alakum, shaking hands with a non mahram is something that has been bothering me for soo long...i dont seem to know what to do when a guy puts his hand out for me to shake and theres not enough time for me to explain to him why i dont shake it..i dont want to be rude and not shake it..and have him thinking that i'm being arrogant or whatever...niether do i want to shake it cuz its not allowed in islam...any suggestions on what to do? |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| Jenna |
| 10/31/01 at 15:16:31 |
| [wlm] I understand what you are saying. What you can say to them is "I cannot shake your hand due to my religion". Now, either they respect that and say "I am sorry; I didnt know" or they will frown. Nothing they can do but respect that. Insha'Allah Allah Subhana'wa ta'aala will reward you tremdously!! Remember His reward surpasses their frowns! and He will be the one you will answer too! Insha'Allah! (just a reminder) Hope this helped!;-D ;-D Jenna :-) |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| bhaloo |
| 10/31/01 at 15:36:19 |
| slm We had this discussion on here before and insha'Allah someone can find the link to that thread and put it up, but one of the beneficial posts in there was from sister Jannah, where she mentioned she says I can't shake your hand (maybe she said for religious reasons as well) and then she added, "but its a pleasure to meat you" (or maybe I'm happy to meat you), so that way the person doesn't feel bad. |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| Hajreee |
| 10/31/01 at 17:35:19 |
| Salaams Br.Bhaloo... it's meet, not meat... hehe, sorry i was laughing at that :) but sis sumuyya, my sister told me something she did whenever some guy would come and wanted to shake her hand.. it was something really slick... but i don't quite remember it.. so i'll have to get back to you on that :) inshaAllah... okee dokee Wa Salaams |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| Kathy |
| 10/31/01 at 19:33:59 |
| I hear that meeting men is like a "meat" factory....:o |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| meraj |
| 10/31/01 at 20:31:58 |
| slm, you 'accidentally' sneeze in your hand right as they extend theirs for you to shake ;-D heh.. im j/k.. yeah i think the best thing is to jus say im sorry i can shake your hand due to my beliefs.. and what sr. jannah said, reassure them that you mean do disrespect by telling them its a pleasure to meet them. and i guess one thing you never want to do is apologize... i mean that in the sense that you shouldnt say that you're sorry you cant shake their hand.. cause islamic adhab is nothign to be ashamed of :) |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| Lisha |
| 11/01/01 at 12:42:46 |
| as-salaam alaikum, i had this same problem earlier in the year, i try to avoid all the males in college now. When i realise a male is about to approach me i get up and go else where (u c he cant change the direction he's walkin in so he just cant approach u;)). some people around u may think ur extreme, just ignore them!!! ne wau=ys wateva u do, Remember if u take the time to explain your religion it'll make life much easier for another sister out there who doesnt wanna shake hands with a non-mehram:) but the sneezing idea seems to be the easy way out;) sorry if i din make sence take care |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| Arsalan |
| 11/01/01 at 15:28:13 |
| [slm] [quote]you 'accidentally' sneeze in your hand right as they extend theirs for you to shake [/quote]That's gross! Please don't do that ... that'll just give the impressoin that all hijabis (or Muslims) are gross people. Just say I'm sorry, I can't shake hands with men. My religion doesn't allow me to shake hands with men that are not related to me. Don't take it offensively. It's nothing personal against you. I hope you don't mind. It's a pleasure to meet you :) What I usually do is look at the face of the person. If it's turning red, I give a longer explanation. If it's normal, then I just keep it to what I said above. By the way, some scholars say that if not shaking the hands will become an obstacle for da'wah, then it is ok for you to shake hands. BUT right after you shake the hands, tell the person that you shook their hand because you didn't want to offend them. But your religion doesn't allow you to do that. Basically, prepare them for next time, so that they will not extend their hand to a Muslim in the future, whether you or someone else. Wassalamu alaikum. |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| meraj |
| 11/01/01 at 21:57:30 |
| slm, [quote]That's gross! Please don't do that ... that'll just give the impressoin that all hijabis (or Muslims) are gross people.[/quote] i was jus jokin akhi ;) |
| Re: shaking hands with a non mahram |
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| se7en |
| 11/02/01 at 00:07:23 |
| as salaamu alaykum wa rahmatAllah, Two more threads on shaking hands are [url=http://www.jannah.org/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl/YaBB.pl?board=madrasa&action=display&num=3669]here[/url] and [url=http://www.jannah.org/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl/YaBB.pl?board=sisters&action=display&num=720]here[/url] :) |
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