MY DEEPEST FEELINGS

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MY DEEPEST FEELINGS
ABD
11/26/01 at 23:17:52
Assalamu Alaikum waRahmatullahi waBarakatuHu,

I pray to Allah that this finds everyone in the best of health, happiness, and taqwa insha'Allah.

This post is a really personal one but I need to know if others feel what I feel as well, so here it goes.
For sometime now, I've been trying to change my ways, and trying to become more devoted to my deen and to Allah-u Subhana Wata'ala. Alhamdulillah all is going well now, I'm more concentrated in my prayers and since Ramadhan started, my life has been blessed more, Alhamdulillah.
Sometimes, when I pray, I get very emotional and I start crying. Sometimes it's light, but sometimes it's pretty heavy. I dunno know if that's happened to anyone else, but when I cry in Salat, I feel that my heart opens up and it's filled with the love of Allah-u Subhana Wata'ala. When I finish prayer, I sit there for some time and make my du'a. My question comes in here. When I'm making my du'a, my hearts beats faster, and there's this overwhelming feeling inside of me. It's as if my heart wants to get bigger and wants to expand but it can't. It's a very weird feeling, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that it's bad, just that it's something I've never felt before. But I can tell you this, that it's not a bad feeling. In my du'a, I thank Allah-u Subhana Wata'ala for all that He's given me, even though I can never thank him enough, Alhamdulillah. I've been reading some books on the purification of the soul and have been listening to audio cassettes of Purification of the Heart by Hamza Yusuf at a halaqa, and I'm starting to think, I'm not sure, that it feels like my spiritual heart is telling me to make more dhikr and that will calm down my physical heart. We've been talking about the spiritual heart at the halaqah and Hamza Yusuf said that the spiritual heart was in the middle of the physical body. And when I get that feeling, it's right in the middle of my chest, Subhanallah. Like I said, I dunno know how to explain it any further, but it's something I've never experienced before. I'm wondering if anyone else has experienced something like this, and to plz share it with me. I thank Allah-u Subhana Wata'ala for letting me experience this because I sort of feel like I'm going on the right path, but wAllah'u A'lim.
Jaza Kumullahu Khair.

Wassalamu Alaikum,
Betul
Re: MY DEEPEST FEELINGS
Mystic
11/27/01 at 11:05:59
[slm]
Subhana Allah!!! your experience mirrors mine exactly!!!! I feel that way only when I am thinking about Allah, praying, or actively worshipping....When I am not, and the moment my mind strays I go into these aweful nightmares:(:(:( But i think that's jus' cuz of the past, history can be a bitter piece of pie to bite from:):):):) ;)
Anywayz, May Allah increase us all in our Taqwa...To the point we can fly back to Him with open wings:):):):):):)
:-)

Wa Allahu A'alam.
[wlm]


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