Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| se7en |
| 12/19/01 at 20:27:18 |
as salaamu alaykum wa rahmatAllah, I don't remember if this was asked before.. but has anyone listened it? What did you think? What topics does it cover? Jazakam Allahu khayran :) wasalaamu alaykum wa rahmatAllah. |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| ahmer |
| 12/19/01 at 21:47:38 |
| slm i haven't heard the tapes myself, but from my friends, whose teacher he was at ghazaly school here in nj, he is really good at gender relations! and my friends tell me, he is an expert on this issue. from what they quote , he looks to be pretty logical !!! though i have to listen to him soon:) wlm ahmer |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| Ruqayyah |
| 12/19/01 at 23:39:01 |
| [slm] I've listened to 2 of the tapes, and they're really good :) I really would love to get my hands on the other tapes in the series, or if they came out w/ a CD, that would great. He's a good speaker in the sense that he's very personable, very knowledgable, and is funny too. He provides some very beautiful and touching examples of couples around the Prophet (saw)'s time. There were a lot of times when you just have to let out a big "awwwwww" ;-D. I definitely recommend listening to it or giving it as an engagement gift ;) I don't think he was married at the time when he made the tapes, and now that he is married, i wonder if he has gained a new perspective on married life. [wlm] Ruqayyah |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| se7en |
| 12/19/01 at 23:48:51 |
as salaamu alaykum, Yeah, from his speeches in the past I know he has some *amazing* insight when it comes to women, mashaAllah. May Allah bless him and his spouse :) I just listened to the first half of the first tape.. nothing about gender yet :) But a beautiful explanation of 'ilm and it's purpose - to facilitate worship. I'll let y'all know when I get to the good stuff ;) And his voice is very cool :) wasalaam.. |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| AbdulBasir |
| 12/20/01 at 04:14:25 |
| [slm] (the abbreviated,not ready for Jannah.Org Reviews quite yet review :) ) The interesting thing about that series is that he completely dissects, and I mean [i]really[/i] dissects, the hadith of Umm Zara, as it has come to be known, in which Aisha relates the story of a bunch of Qurayshi (jahili) women talking about their husbands and their positive and negative attributes. And Shaykh Adhami goes through each one and analyzes it and reflects on how it pertains to an Islamic marriage. And then of course the last of the women talking of her husband is Umm Zara herself, and after Aisha relates the story of Abu Zara (the husband) to Rasulallah[saw] he says that he[saw] is to Aisha as Abu Zara is to Umm Zara. (the hadith is posted in full below). So obviously this is a picture of good qualities in a husband, so Adhami analyzes them and talks about it. What impressed me the most about this series was the detail and breadth in his linguistic analysis. He breaks down every single word and goes through all the meanings and origins. (the translated hadith posted below doesn't begin to go through the rich meanings Adhami relates) I can't remember how many times he quotes the Arabic and dissects it and says "this is divine language". I surely lost count of all the times he said that. :) The series is six tapes long, and he basically goes through just this one hadith throughout the whole series. Truly amazing. There are a lot of times when I was listening to tapes and I thought to myself "wow, some brothers really should and need to listen to this!" It is rare enough to hear some of things Adhami says in our Muslim circles, and rarer even to hear them with the scholarship Adhami brings to the discussion. My only disappointment, and it cannot be termed really a disappointment, but really an unfulfilled expectation (derived from a somewhat misleading back cover) was that it didn't talk about "gender relations" in the social, non-marital realm. I had expected something about that from what the back cover of the tapes said. But the "gender relations" discussed in the series is pretty much just on the relationship between husband and wife. That being said, this is what makes the series even greater in that respect. Anyone who is married, is going to be, or wants to be, would do well in listening to this tape, especially brothers. [slm] (posted the hadith below) [color=black] Collection of Sahih Muslim, Book 31, #5998 'A'isha reported that (one day) there sat together eleven women making an explicit promise amongst themselves that they would conceal nothing about their spouses. The first one said: My husband is a sort of the meat of a lean camel placed at the top of a hill, which it is difficult to climb up, nor (the meat) is good enough that one finds in oneself the urge to take it away (from the top of that mountain). The second one said: My husband (is so bad) that I am afraid I would not be able to describe his faults-both visible and invisible completely. The third one said: My husband is a long-statured fellow (i. e. he lacks intelligence). If I give vent to my feelings about him, he would divorce me, and if I keep quiet I would be made to live in a state of suspense (neither completely abandoned by him nor entertained as wife). The fourth one said: My husband is like the night of Tihama (the night of Hijaz and Mecca), neither too cold nor hot, neither there is any fear of him nor grief. The fifth one said: My husband is (like) a leopard as he enters the house, and behaves like a lion when he gets out, and he does not ask about that which he leaves in the house. The sixth one said: So far as my husband is concerned, he eats so much that nothing is left back and when he drinks he drinks that no drop is left behind. And when he lies down he wraps his body and does not touch me so that he may know my grief. The seventh one said: My husband is heavy in spirit, having no brightness in him, impotent, suffering from all kinds of conceivable diseases, heaving such rough manners that he may break my head or wound my body, or may do both. The eighth one said: My husband is as sweet as the sweet-smelling plant, and as soft as the softness of the hare. The ninth one said: My husband is the master of a lofty building, long-statured, having heaps of ashes (at his door) and his house is near the meeting place and the inn. The tenth one said: My husband is Malik, and how fine Malik is, much above appreciation and praise (of mine). He has many folds of his camel, more in number than the pastures for them. When they (the camels) hear the sound of music they become sure that they are going to be slaughtered. The eleventh one said: My husband is Abu Zara'. How fine Abu Zara' is! He has suspended in my ears heavy ornaments and (fed me liberally) that my sinews and bones are covered with fat. So he made me happy. He found me among the shepherds living in the side of the mountain, and he made me the owner of the horses, camels and lands and heaps of grain and he finds no fault with me. I sleep and get up in the morning (at my own sweet will) and drink to my heart's content. The mother of Abu Zara', how fine is the mother of Abu Zara'! Her bundles are heavily packed (or receptacles in her house are filled to the brim) and the house quite spacious. So far as the son of Abu Zara' is concerned, his bed is as soft as a green palm-stick drawn forth from its bark, or like a sword drawn forth from its scabbard, and whom just an arm of a lamb is enough to satiate. So far as the daughter of Abu Zara' is concerned, how fine is the daughter of Abu Zara', obedient to her father, obedient to her mother, wearing sufficient flesh and a source of jealousy for her co-wife. As for the slave-girl of Abu Zara', how fine is she; she does not disclose our affairs to others (outside the four walls of the house). She does not remove our wheat, or provision, or take it forth, or squander it, but she preserves it faithfully (as a sacred trust). And she does not let the house fill with rubbish. One day Abu Zara' went out (of his house) when the milk was churned in the vessels, that he met a woman, having two children like leopards playing with her pomegranates (chest) under her vest. He divorced me (Umm Zara') and married that woman (whom Abu Zara') met on the way. I (Umm Zara') later on married another person, a chief, who was an expert rider, and a fine archer: he bestowed upon me many gifts and gave me one pair of every kind of animal and said: Umm Zara', make use of everything (you need) and send forth to your parents (but the fact) is that even if I combine all the gifts that he bestowed upon me, they stand no comparison to the least gift of Abu Zara'. 'A'isha reported that Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said to me: I am for you as Abu Zara' was for Umm Zara' |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| *sofia* |
| 12/20/01 at 22:49:46 |
| Assalaamu alaikum wa rahmatullah, My sentiments almost exactly, bro AbdulBasir. I expected a bit more of the social context of gender relations, but I think what Shaikh Adhami actually did talk about, he expounded upon beautifully. I went away understanding the above hadith in a completely different way than I originally thought I did. Unfortunately, haven't listened to it in over a year (someone has permanently borrowed mine), but I remember thinking, "I'm going to have to make this a 'wedding gift' for the next friend of mine to get married." I forgot about that until now. Especially good for the brothers to listen to. I think it was in this series, that Adhami actually had to stop one of the sessions because he was so distraught by a student's question/comment about domestic abuse...I guess ya gotta listen to it (he was distraught, I think, by the fact that it was a Muslim who could perpetrate the abuse on another person, particularly on a female). I give it 2 thumbs up. :) |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| AbdulBasir |
| 12/21/01 at 01:23:00 |
| [quote] I think it was in this series, that Adhami actually had to stop one of the sessions because he was so distraught by a student's question/comment about domestic abuse...I guess ya gotta listen to it (he was distraught, I think, by the fact that it was a Muslim who could perpetrate the abuse on another person, particularly on a female).[/quote] [slm] You are right, it was in this series. He ends the session very abruptly after reading a written question. [slm] |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| jannah |
| 12/21/01 at 16:40:34 |
| salaam, br abdullah is working on a book about gender relations. in it i hope he will address those 'most well known' hadiths about women that everyone uses as 'evidence' for things...ie y'all know em... he explains them so well.. i hope people will read it inshallah and i know he hopes to perpetuate change among our leaders and ulema as well about this subject.. off topic it is amazing what people are doing in different parts of the world.. what great projects they are working on.. pls make dua for them... ok me out.. p e a c e :) |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| Marcie |
| 12/21/01 at 17:45:01 |
| As salamu alaykum Where can I find these tapes? As salamu alaykum Marcie |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| AbdulBasir |
| 12/22/01 at 01:58:27 |
| [quote]br abdullah is working on a book about gender relations[/quote] [slm] He's been working on this for several years hasn't he? Can't wait... Is he still in Dimashq? jannah maybe you can put in a good word for us to him so that we can get it straight off the presses when it's ready :) Sr. Marcie, I think you can find the tapes at some of the online Islamic stores, most of them should have it... [slm] |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| ahmer |
| 12/22/01 at 07:51:22 |
[slm] i searched every online store, and surprisingly it's only available at [url]http://www.ihyaproductions.com/tape_catalogue/descriptions/aa-110.html[/url] i got it from there!!!!:) [wlm] ahmer |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| destined |
| 12/22/01 at 17:27:06 |
| [slm] [quote]i searched every online store, and surprisingly it's only available at http://www.ihyaproductions.com/tape_catalogue/descriptions/aa-110.html [/quote] You can also get it from Astrolabe, it's a bit cheaper than from where Ahmer got his. http://store.yahoo.com/astrolabe/agri.html |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| se7en |
| 12/22/01 at 17:51:56 |
It's on sale at Ihya now for $40 Canadian.. I think that's like $25 in American dollars.. salaam |
| Re: Adhami's Gender Relations tape series |
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| ahmer |
| 12/24/01 at 07:24:50 |
| $ 32.3935 with shipping charge to NJ :) |
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