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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Play by Play |
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| Kathy |
| 03/04/02 at 09:28:58 |
| [slm] Yesterday my 7 year old son ran into the kitchen every five minutes to keep me posted on a basketball game that i had no interest in - nor cared about. ::) What are some appropiate responces to make him think that i care and am interested? ;) He was so enthusiastic- I did not want to :P it for him. |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| eleanor |
| 03/05/02 at 17:14:19 |
| [slm] I know you were expecting a guy to respond to this but to be honest Kathy I think I know this answer. My little brother used to come home from school every day and give me a blow by blow account of his lunchtime football game.. I was no more interested in this than I was in listening to a report on how fast grass grows. So I used to say things like "Wow" "Cool" "Really" "Awesome" "Oh no.." "Never mind" "oh well". I know exactly how you feel. I can still remember his little excited face telling me how he scored the winning goal and blah blah blah and there was no way in the world that I could burst his bubble by saying I wasn't interested. My sister used to do that to me and it used to hurt so bad. :'( So Kathy give it a go with the above phrases.. he only needs to see that you acknowledge him at all..what you say at the end of the day doesn't matter all that much :) wasalaam eleanor :-* |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| BroHanif |
| 03/05/02 at 17:27:25 |
| Why do you not care about your sons interest in basketball Sis Kathy ? I mean one day he might be playing for school and then you'll really have to be interested. 'Perhaps your son is telling this story to the one best friend he has in life' have you thought of it that way ? And what about your intention I think I'd feel very guilty if I used words that I didn't mean. salaams Hanif |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| bhaloo |
| 03/05/02 at 19:59:15 |
| [slm] I'm with Bro Hanif on this one. And don't worry Kathy, me and Abu Hamza will help you practice. Feel free to participate in our NBA discussions and pick up pointers. ;) |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| Abu_Hamza |
| 03/05/02 at 20:31:20 |
| And the first thing that you must learn, Kathy, is anything that bhaloo says about the Lakers and Kobe is ... ridiculously biased and false!!! Wassalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah :) |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| Kathy |
| 03/05/02 at 23:05:49 |
| [quote author=BroHanif link=board=bro;num=1015252139;start=0#2 date=03/05/02 at 17:27:25]Why do you not care about your sons interest in basketball Sis Kathy ? 'Perhaps your son is telling this story to the one best friend he has in life' have you thought of it that way ?[/quote] [wlm] :'( :'( :'(WAAAHHHHHHHH :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( Bro Haniff- Mothers have enough guilt as it is with out you adding more!!!!!!! :P I know, I know- I should just stop everything and listen to all that his heart desires to tell me. And I should stop every five minutes to hear all about the exciting game on tv. :-[ Reality- a woman is not interested in everything a man has to say- but at least we are compassionate enough to not let them know. I wonder how many grocery or to do lists are compiled during conversations... Never the less- you made a good point and my natural hormones have taken over.... :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(- [i] (how could i have neglected by son)[/i] :'( :'( :'( :-) |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| eleanor |
| 03/06/02 at 06:59:44 |
| [slm] Don't listen to them Kathy!!! :o :o they haven't a clue!! wasalaam eleanor :-* |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| mujaahid |
| 03/06/02 at 14:10:07 |
| Kathy and Eleanor, you both say you couldnt care less about what your kids were doing at luch time right, but thats because they were doing something good, i.e. playing football, basketball, watching it etc. BUT you WOULD be interested if he told you he smoked at Lunch, or treid some tablet, or maybe skipped afternoon school to hang round the parks with his mates, or if he had a girlfriend! Your kids pointlessly going on may mean nothing to you, but it means a lot to them, and because they go on about something good, you dont wanna know, but if it was something bad, you WOUDL wanna know, and WOULD be interested, and dissapointed. So be happy what your kids are doing, because things could be far worse. Now that you are mods, you are authority, and as you should now know, those in authority are the ones who get noticed the most, so their mistakes are BIG NEWS!! LOL (DEEP EVIL LAUGH) WAAA HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! THAT is the downside to becoming mods, for you that is. I'm gona make the most of it :-/ |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| eleanor |
| 03/07/02 at 04:00:47 |
| [slm] Brother Mujaahid, as usual you totally missed the point. I think I am speaking for Kathy too, when I say that we were not interested in the finer details of the game. It was not that we were not interested in how my brother (or her son) were spending their time. This is how my little brother's converstation would go: "So I got the ball right? And I dribbled up towards Pidgeon and dodged around him and in the meantime Ingie had come up on my left, so I passed it to him and he passed it back because he was going to be tackled by Johnny, and I got the ball again and the goal was open! The goal was open! And then Paul comes out of nowhere and takes me down with one tackle...oh man, I had it in the goal, I swear I had it in the goal. So Paul heads off down the other end with the ball, but I wasn' t going to let him go because remember last week when he scored and all the lads were laughing at me because I was in goal..." This goes on and on and on.. What else can you say except "um hmm" "right" "good" "cool" or so on? Do you think it's a good idea to say "listen brother, I have absolutely no interest in your football game whatsoever so shut up.." Do you think that's a good idea Mujaahid??? The football game is important to *him* and that's all that counts. I wish you wouldn`t be so quick off the mark to draw assumptions out of the air brother Mujaahid. wasalaam eleanor :-* |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| gift |
| 03/13/02 at 05:42:02 |
| [slm] my brother talks to me constantly about his interest in computer games and cars, and honestly i was never really very interested. but when he was younger ie about 10 i was doing my gcses (i think they're equivalent to US sats ???) so i was always very busy, but he would always talk to me about the cartoons he watched, and he wanted me to like them so much. i wasn't really interested, but i decided that if he chose me to talk to above everyone else i had to make the effort to be interested. like you eleanor my sister just used to tell me she wasn't interested :'( and i decided i never wanted to make my bro feel like that. well with the cars and stuff now, i find it all really boring, but again like eleanor says i try to listen, and if i concentrate hard enough and ask him a couple of questions i see his eyes light up and how happy he is, that it makes it all worth while. and besides when i want to talk to someone about something that's got me excited i talk to him too and if i'm boring him he doesn't show it either. i even get him to help me bake cakes and stuff :-/ [wlm] |
| Re: Play by Play |
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| Othman |
| 03/13/02 at 10:04:35 |
| [slm] I could be wrong but it seems to me that Sis Kathy SPECIFICALLY asked for help on what to do about making her son feel good and feel like she was interested in what he was saying. [glow=red,2,300]What are some appropiate responces to make him think that i care and am interested? [/glow] If she had no been interested in her son, she would not have asked for help in the first place. It is obvious to me that she cares abou her son, but could care less about the game her son was narrating...nothing wrong with that. Some people like some sports, and some people don't. Brothers need to lay off, and stop trying to put guilt trips on the sista! Kathy, we go through this often, not only with children, but with adults as well. I will find myself listening to someone telling me something about which I could care less, but I don't let them know that I could care less. They are telling me with such enthusiasm, that its obvious to me that they an attentive ear to make them happy. Sometimes it's the other way around: I'd be telling people something that does not interest them ( I am sure), but nontheless, there they are, listening to me, as if it was the most important thing they heard in their life. Sure feels good to have an attentive ear listening to you (Thank you, Jenna!) ;-) Othman |
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