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| What's in a name? |
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| BUSHRA |
| 05/14/02 at 15:19:09 |
| [slm] It has been a while since my lost post, things have been really busy (had to drop out of wwbtam :P) but I'm having a problem and would appreciate some advice. Here goes (DEEP BREATH) ::) As some of you my know I have two children Alhamdolillah (boy and a girl), what you guys don't know is that my son's name happens to be Osama :o and he's about 5. Now when he was born I named him after one of my favorite Sahabas in muslim history and back then I did not even know much about alqaeda let alone OBL. :( Anyway, 9/11 happened lots of things changed. Luckily in London and particularly where we live , we did not experience any hostility or anything :-[. Sure we got the odd joke or two but even that from mostly desi folkes. There was only one time when I was asked by a receptionist in a doctor's office on how he(my son) ended up with that name and I just smiled and said that he got that name before it became this popular/notorious. He also asked me the meaning of the word and I told him that osama means "description of a lion". The thing is, people around (mostly family) keep mentioning that we should change his name and that he may face a lot of problems/hostility/racism due to it. :'( Some of them have recently been to the U.S. and said that they felt odd using this name publicly and felt very conscious. Last year , after 9/11 I also felt a little conscious using his name publicly but I got over it but now after the suggestions I've been getting lately there is a part of me that worries about his future but going as far as to change a sound name which I kept with the best of intentions seems a bit extreme. I keep going over and over this in my mind and frankly I feel confused and a little lost and tired. ::) I'll look forward to hearing your replies and especially from Kathy, Eleanor,MF, Jannah, Seven , Br. Arshad, br.hanif and abu hamza. The rest of you are also more than welcome to reply :) Jazakullah in advance. BUSHRA :-) |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| nouha |
| 05/14/02 at 17:52:52 |
| [slm] my brothers name is Yasir, which is one of the famous names in mideast politics today..., he is 16 years old, so he can defend for himself if anyone bothers him becuase of it, not too much people disturb him becuase of that name, he politely responds if anyone has any questions, and grills them if they have any rude comments, but anyway thats the way my bro is... but since your son is only fire, i guess thats a different situation. but since ur stuck between two things, you can make salatuk istikhara for ur sons name, although i have never heard of someone praying istikhara for a name, but in ur situation its different. i dont know if i helped u at all...... :-[ wasalam nouha:) |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| Abu_Hamza |
| 05/15/02 at 02:34:15 |
| [slm] There's two brothers in our town whose names are Usamah and Ayman! Since 9/11, some of us joking call them Bin Laden and Ayman Zwahiri :) Usamah is one of my all-time favorite names. In fact, if my nickname wasn't Abu Hamza, it'd probably be either Abu Ibraheem or Abu Usamah :) If you ask me sister, I'd tell you to - by all means - keep that name for your son! That name is too good to be changed because of someone who the west has made out to be the biggest villain in its own history! The people also need to know that just because someone's name is Usamah (or Abdullah, Muhammad, *insert any Arabic name here*), it doesn't make them a member of Al-Qaeda, or a terrorist. I really think that the way to end any kind of a stereotype is not by changing that part about us which is being stereotyped, but by truly *living* our identity to its fullest. Examples ... If someone has a stereotype against blondes ... that all blondes are stupid ... the way to change that stereotype is not to dye your hair brown! The way to change it is by showing the people that although you *are* a blonde, you're *not* stupid. Or if someone has a stereotype against Arabs ... that all Arabs are terrorists ... then the way to change that stereotype is not to change your name or your appearance or your acclaimed nationality. The way to change that stereotype is by showing the people that although you *are* an Arab, you're a nice, morally upright, admirable individual! Similarly, if someone has a stereotype against the name Usamah ... that all Usamahs are named after Bin Laden, because they are somehow impressed with Bin Laden's stance against the West, or "his terrorist attacks on the WTC", etc ... then the way to change that stereotype - once again - is not by changing your name from Usamah to something else. The way to change it is by showing the people that although your name *is* Usamah, you're your own man, and the only Usamah that you do try to imitate is Usamah ibn Zayd ibn al-Harithah (known as Zayd ibn Muhammad [saw]) in the time of jaahiliyyah. Radi Allaahu anhumaa. You see what I'm saying? Don't let nobody make you change who you are and what you like for your son. Especially if what you like for your son is a wonderful name like the name of the beloved "grandson" of the Prophet [saw]. The "grandson" who was made the leader of the army of the Sahaabah while Abu Bakr, Umar, Uthman, Ali, Abu Ubaydah, Talhah, Zubayr, Khalid ibn Waleed, Sa'ad ibn Waqqas and Amr ibn al-Aas were *all* still alive! And Usamah, at the time, was only 17 years old!!! Subhan Allah! Take care sister. And keep up the Mujaahadah (struggle). Wassalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah. |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| M.F. |
| 05/15/02 at 07:13:14 |
| Bismillah, Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah, I agree with Abu Hamza on this one. Keep your son's name, and insha Allah he'll show the world that just because someone's name is Usama, or Marwan or Mohammad or Yasser (which are all very beautiful names) doesn't mean they're evil or fit into any stereotype. Your son insha Allah will be a shining example and follow in the footsteps of the Usama you named him after. If anyone does ask you why your son's name is Usama tell them that you named him after one of your favorite people in history and tell the what you know about Usama ibn Zayd. Anyone who thinks a little bit about it will see that you named your son well before the world had heard of OBL. If it's racism you're afraid of, I'm afraid that whether you name him Usama or.... Adam (which is one of those international neutral names) if people are going to be racist they're going to be racist. That's the sad truth. Insha Allah don't let the jokes get to you. It's sad that they're coming mainly from Muslims :( May your children be excellent examples of Muslims and may Allah guide many through them. Ameen. |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| Kathy |
| 05/15/02 at 08:58:07 |
| [slm] I agree. Nothing better than to see a cute little Usama running around playfully.- That will do more positive things for our image. On a less serious note- When I was trying to figure out a name for my puppet i really like the name Abdullah- for dawah purposes. Just the idea of having to explain the meaning was just great for Islam. But I didn't want to call him Abdullah because of the Nation of Islam and the negativity surrounding this name. But then I thought twice and figured that if all the kids who at 5,6,and 7 years of age (who have no concept of NOI), made the connection of adorable Abdullah the puppet every time they heard the name- a new generation would arise with out the negative preconceptions. Insha Allah this will happen with your darling son! |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| nouha |
| 05/15/02 at 13:15:53 |
| [slm] subhanalah i also have a brother named named ayman, my brothers: yasir and ayman, partners in crime ;) j/k for anyone who gets offended by that one.... wasalam nouha:) |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| muqaddar |
| 05/15/02 at 13:35:11 |
| [slm] stick with the name sis osama means like a lion . I think it will generate interest and give the kid character. let Allah (swt) judge the muslims |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| Addison |
| 05/15/02 at 19:51:58 |
| Dear Sir BUSHRA, I read your note today regarding your son's name and was absolutely heart-sick. I live in North Carolina (not by choice!!) and I am constantly amazed by the attitudes of people who call themselves Christians.. who continue to punish the entire nation of Islam for the acts of a few men. I was raised in a Baptist household and quite frankly I am ashamed of the way the majority of the people in the "Bible Belt" have behaved concerning the events of 9/11. I am no longer a practicing Baptist, however I feel deep regret at the fact that the Christian community and others as well have not handled this situation with the humanity for which they wish to be known. But I am babbling . I think I am so filled with emotion at having read your message that I am not responding in an appropriate and lady-like fashion. A child's name is a matter which must be well thought upon - to me, it is like a man's word - a man is as good as his word; when he speaks a word, he becomes that word. I believe the same is true with names. You put a lot of thought and effort into choosing your son's name- that is a gift from you which he will always cherish. If you will permit me to say so, I think it would be a shame for you to change it. The world will always be filled with ignorant and intolerant people... you have risen above them...now take your son with you. (I hope that you will both indulge and forgive me for saying this, but I am reminded of a quote from the Old Test., "Come out from among them and be ye separate.") With kind regards, Respectfully, Addison |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| BUSHRA |
| 05/16/02 at 05:16:18 |
| [slm] Jazakullah to all of your replies , may Allah Subhanahu Wataala reward you immensly for it. :) As I said earlier , the suggestion of changing his name did not go well with me at all but as a mother I did and probably will worry ::) about someone mistreating him one day because of his name , maybe for admission to uni or when applying for a job :( I guess its just human nature to think ahead even though I know that I can't say where I'll be in the next hour , let alone 10 or 15 years. But I'll just have to keep my tawakkul on Allah strong and have faith . Ameen. Oh, and I do have a cute story for all of you about my usamah, when people first started teasing him by saying "aap binladen ho " which means "you are b-- la---" he would angrily say "I'm not ALLADIN". You see he mistook B-- L---- for alladin :-/. Anyway we explained to him that they were talking about someone else who also happened to be osama and that everyone was only joking about it. And he has been ok about it since mashallah. :-X Any way thanks again. BUSHRA :-) |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| Addison |
| 05/16/02 at 08:52:15 |
| Dear Bushra, I will not trouble you again after this! I only wanted to apologize for my letter head of "Sir." Am I in such a habit of starting this way, that I do it without thinking?? I think not. The real truth is (as humiliating as this is for me to write) that I have some trouble with the genders of Muslim names, as I am quite a novice to the Muslim ckmmunity. I feel certain that some bit of information in your message would have "tipped me off," so to speak, had I not been too ignorant to recognize it. I meant no disrespect, and I do beg your most humble pardon. With kind regards, Addison, lord of the idiots... |
| Re: What's in a name? |
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| BUSHRA |
| 05/16/02 at 11:45:52 |
| [slm] Dear Addison, no need for apology :) , I have the same problem with different names sometimes ;). Don't worry about it. :-* BUSHRA :-) PS(oops, sorry ::)I mistook "ADDISON" for "EDDISON", but its fixed now :-[ ) |
| 05/17/02 at 08:35:12 |
| BUSHRA |
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