A R C H I V E S
Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| how'd u advice |
|---|
| hanna |
| 06/04/02 at 05:19:09 |
| salam brothers and sisters ! well we all know that there are so many ppl out there who have boy friends or girlfriends depending on their gender . So emm islamically well its wrong .but i was just wandering how'd u advice em to get out of it ? .coz well the ones i know of dont have any physical relationships but wanna stay in touch and see each other untill they get married . and they intend on getting married like after 3-4 yrs after finishin off university . So how would u say to em that they shudnt do what theyre doing ? coz well theyd get offended coz theyre just madly in love wid someone ! |
| Re: how'd u advice |
|---|
| Kathy |
| 06/04/02 at 08:59:51 |
| [slm] I am not sure if this will help- but here is one sister's experience. She too was Muslim, young and in love. They began to have a physical relationship but her guilts were way to strong and she ended it almost immediately. This was over thirty years ago and her life is changed- she has a beautiful family, her eman is strong and she is a very kind and generous sister. However, for more than thirty years she has been tortured over her sin. [i]hmmm. ... a couple of moments of stupidity has shadowed her entire life.[/i] |
| 06/04/02 at 09:01:14 |
| Kathy |
| Re: how'd u advice |
|---|
| Chris |
| 06/04/02 at 10:53:45 |
| Do you means girlfriends/boyfriends as in lovers or just friends? I know and like a few Muslim girls, but I would not take them to bed. If lovers, I'm afaid you will just have to let them discover their mistakes on their own. Chris |
| Re: how'd u advice |
|---|
| jannah |
| 06/11/02 at 12:18:52 |
| Chris, If you saw some children trapped in a building that was on fire, would you try to help them? As Muslims, we feel we should do everything we can to help each other because we believe in the Hereafter and we want to help our brothers and sisters avoid pain and misery both in this life and the next. And the way to avoid this pain and misery is to follow the commandments and rulings of Islam which are sent by God to protect humanity and individuals sometimes from their own selves. As for your friends hanna, I suggest encouraging them to try to persuade their parents to do their Nikkah and then wait until after uni and stuff for their walima. This is a trend here in our community and I think it's actually a very good one. For one thing if you have your nikah it is legal to do anything you want together and be alone, etc., but you don't have the full responsibilities of marriage and living together yet. Also, both people are committed to each other and don't have to worry about something not working out 4 years from now and having their hearts broken. |
| Re: how'd u advice |
|---|
| Chris |
| 06/15/02 at 19:32:45 |
| (there must be a problem with the server somewhere, I'm sure I posted a responce to this, but it does not show up.) Hi, Jannah Of course I would try to save children caught in a fire, its not their fault that their in it, after all. But I have no right to interfere in someone else's free choice, unless if I'm directly affeted. I belevie that people are responcible to God for their actions, mere humans don't have the right to interfere. In my life, one 'do-gooder' and busybody told me that I was doing wrong, though no fault of my own. She did this so much that I nearly commited suicide. Can you imagine an 11 year old boy doing that? Young people tend to resent older people telling them what to do, your interfearence, however well motivated, will only cause them to reject you. Thats evolution at work, it helps them to become independent of their perents. Be there when they need you and prey for them, but they must be allowed their free choice. That is God greatest gift to humanity, it must NOT be surpressed. Regards Chris |
| Re: how'd u advice |
|---|
| BroHanif |
| 06/16/02 at 07:46:26 |
| [slm] [quote]Young people tend to resent older people telling them what to do, your interfearence, however well motivated, will only cause them to reject you. Thats evolution at work, it helps them to become independent of their perents. [/quote] Ann ill thought Chris, respect to parents in Islam is held very high, no mater if your in your teens or in your 40's. We can't have the view that we disregard our parents, they are our superiors and in Islam Jannah can be attained through serving them. And becoming independant ??? Why so we can then put them in an old peoples home ?? By Allah Never!. [quote]Be there when they need you and prey for them, but they must be allowed their free choice. That is God greatest gift to humanity, it must NOT be surpressed. [/quote] it is the free choice that when a man or woman is not checked for their actions it leads to eveil not only in themsevles but in society as well. Again in Islam if we see an evil being performed we must stop it either by the use of our hands or tongues and to consider it a sin is the lowest form of faith. In Islam we care for others by bringing them closer to Allah and leaving the sins behind, because this is the duty of the ummah. Hanif |
Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board |