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Don't want to/ Can't

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Don't want to/ Can't
Kathy
10/26/02 at 15:47:23
[slm]

I have been asking for help for our Dawah Center. People say they can  and then on the day of fun they cancel out with various reasons.

hmmmm... makes me wonder..... I really hate asking people to do things they don't want to and i am hesitant to call again, and if I do not sure what to say. Kind of like...just tell me now, if you really don't want to I will get someone else. I mean who could look into my eyes and say no to me. But I really want to know!

Our community is pretty divided and I am trying so hard to get us to mingle and work together.

How can a person tell if the person just doesn't want to and can't say no, or the person really had something come up?
Re: Don't want to/ Can't
jannah
10/26/02 at 23:32:17
[wlm]

I think the only way is to learn by experience. You'll find out who's reliable and who isn't over time.  There's a lot of people who "say" they'll do something and help you out, but when it comes to the bottom line they are too "busy" or doing something else or just not committed.
As to whether they're saying it just to say it, just don't pressure them and give them an out like you said there. "If you can't do it or don't have enough time, just let me know InshaAllah. This is important to me and I need someone who can commit to it. But if you can't that's ok because there are other smaller things I need too, etc"

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