A R C H I V E S
Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| safa |
| 11/04/02 at 04:39:58 |
| Its Diwali time out here in India (the Hindu festival of lights). I got a question - how do u react when non-muslims wish u 'Happy Diwali/Christmas (or whatever)'? Do u just say 'I dont celebrate Diwali (or whatever)'? How do you react when muslims say that to you? Besides wanting to break their teeth, i mean. |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| jannah |
| 11/04/02 at 04:42:08 |
| [slm] Umm u shouldn't want to break their teeth? Just use it as a dawah opportunity.. just say Oh Thanks I don't celebrate Diwali, but we have a celebration coming up called Eid, it's after Ramadan where we have to fast, similar to .......................etc etc... and just keep on truckin' ;D |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| safa |
| 11/04/02 at 05:52:56 |
| I just said that to a non-muslim guy- I do not celebrate Diwali. And this is the reply i got, and i'm quoting (i got his sms on my cell) - "How does that matter? Its an Indian festival & not religion specific. Expand your horizons. Life is beautiful without complications." How do you answer that? I am just so sick & tired of all these people- preaching secularism from their rooftops but all a bunch of religious chauvinists. Something else i want 2 say. I have been classified as a weirdo for many reasons, but one of which is, i do not accompany guys when they go out 2 eat. But once it just so happened while i was walking back from college, i was starving & i met this guy i knew. He said he was hungry too, and we just had a quick bite 2 eat (May Allah forgive me, i know it was wrong And i will NEVER do it again,insha Allah). Pretty soon, the rest of the college heard about this (even started teasing the guy, as in, what has he got, that the rest of us dont). And a guy tells me- "In spite of you having been raised in a restricted environment (as in Saudi Arabia), its good to hear, you are learning to be more like us". (That was when i wanted to break his teeth). In other words, welcome back to civilization. And then there are the times when a guy accidentally brushes past you, and he jumps back a mile in mock embarassment ( because i am not supposed to shake their hands and the like). And then of course are the snide remarks on polygamy. And the worst part is the 'high profile' muslims in college are miserable excuses for muslims (i know i am not supposed to say that, but i cant help it). So the non-muslims think that the kind of Islam they practice is right, and what i do must be wrong. And they go about trying to teach me my religion!! >:( (Right now i am reminding myself that swear words are not to be used, but its getting increasingly difficult). I am sorry if i sound like a half-crazed lunatic, but i needed a muslim shoulder to cry on, and you guys were the closest ones. (May Allah bless the virtual world, the real one sucks). |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| BUSHRA |
| 11/04/02 at 07:56:11 |
| [slm], Last week , a sikh friend of mine whome I've known for a long time invited me to a diwali party she had organised, it was women's only and she had a vegetarian menu . I felt very awkward to say no but then I also felt very awkward to go :(. I ended up going for the last half hour of the party. It was women's only and most of them were elderly women, it wasn't a religous event for them since no rites were being performed, but they were singing and stuff. I was the only one in abaya there and there was another muslim friend of mine there aswell. I don't know if I would go again and I am wondering whether I should have gone in the first place to begin with ::). Bushra :-) |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| an |
| 11/04/02 at 10:30:26 |
| Assalammu'alaikum sis safa, I think it's good that you're there.. sticking to Islam and showing them a good example of what a muslim should be... It reminds me of what Proph. Muhammad [saw] said about being strange. Quote from http://www.quraan.com/Tazkiyah/Strangers.asp: 'Abu Huraira narrated that the Messenger of Allah, said: "Islam initiated as something strange, and it would revert to its old position of being strange, [i]so good tidings for the strangers.[/i]" (Recorded by Muslim, Attirmidthi, Ibn Majah, and Ahmad) .... Muslims who then stick firmly to their religion will have many dissenters and only few supporters. The believers at that time become like strangers or aliens even if they are in their own country. ' So sista .. good tidings for you Insha Allah. Hang in there sis :) I think we all feel out of place at some point or another. Here in Oz, I feel weird because I'm different than the people here (as in the clothes, the attitude, etc). There are times when I feel I don't really like being different, especially when ppl treat you not as nice as you'd like them to be ..just because you're a Muslim. But on the other hand I feel so thankful to Allah that He has made me a Muslim. So I usually think of that when I feel kinda mad or down. May Allah makes things easier for you sis safa :). |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| Red |
| 11/04/02 at 10:45:32 |
| [slm], Speaking about non-muslim festivals, My family had the same trouble with Halloween. My little brother and sister who are five yrs old, were invited to a Halloween party, we weren't really sure of whether or not to take them. They were so set on going, we didn't know really what to say to them. They didn't go trick or treating or anything, but they really, really wanted to go to this party. We ended up taking them, but how do you explain to a littl' kid they can't go to a party like that? It was almost like a birthday party, nothing bad, they had pizza, played a few games, and got little party bags afterward. Its real hard to convince little kids with things like Halloween or Valentines they can't do things like that. What do you guys suggest for the future, how do we approach problems like this? This year they were to young to understand trick or treating, but in the future how do you tell them they can't go? I went trick or treating when i was younger at least 3 times. We even give candy out to trick or treaters in the past, do you think that is alright? wasalam, red |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| safa |
| 11/05/02 at 04:30:11 |
| [quote]I don't know if I would go again and I am wondering whether I should have gone in the first place to begin with . [/quote] No you should'nt. This reminds me of the time when my bro was married. After his engagement, we had sent some sweets to some hindu neighbours of ours. And they sent it back saying ther're not supposed to eat certain things on certain days. When they can tell us what they're not supposed to do, why cant we tell them what we are'nt supposed to? It all boils down to our imaan, doesnt it? [quote]We even give candy out to trick or treaters in the past, do you think that is alright? [/quote] Again, its not. We gotta teach them young or else they'll never listen... Which probably explains why i'm sticking to my religion, having been raised in Saudi Arabia, while most muslims in India dont know a thing about their deen. Something i've been wondering... Funny how non-muslims raised in the Gulf have more respect for and understand Islam better than most muslims raised in India(I'm talking about muslim communities in India). That's what the environment you grow up in, does for you. |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| jaihoon |
| 11/05/02 at 05:57:25 |
| [quote author=safa link=board=madrasa;num=1036402983;start=0#6 date=11/05/02 at 04:30:11] Something i've been wondering... Funny how non-muslims raised in the Gulf have more respect for and understand Islam better than most muslims raised in India(I'm talking about muslim communities in India). That's what the environment you grow up in, does for you.[/quote] I dont doubt the 'environment' effect on the intensity of imaan. However, i think a muslim in the democratic india has better chances of expressing his imaan by his heart, voice and hands than a believer in kingdom who is supposed to tie his hands and shut his mouth, no matter what goes around him... whether muslims are butchered around the world or the honorable rulers adopt policies 360 degrees opposite to Islam, he/she has to remain still. Of course, he/she can hate it deep in the heart, but then that 'is the slightest degree of faith' ::) Jaihoon |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| ltcorpest2 |
| 11/05/02 at 12:30:25 |
| not that this is a festival, but do muslims in America celebrate thanksgiving? ( i think it is during ramadan, which means fasting during the day if i am not completely mistaken, so the food part might be difficult) |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| Adi28 |
| 11/05/02 at 13:05:52 |
Salaams everybody well i have to admit this post intrested me enough to respond :) i do have somehting to say in response to one of the american holidays called thannksgiving....unlike holloween,or valentines day, or christmas...Thanksgiving is not a religous holiday nor is it a holiday of celebrating some dead saint...its a tradition that started when the pligrims first came to this country in the 1600's and had a feast with the native americans....this is what i remeber from social studies in elementary school :) so..its historical fact could be a little varied or alot varied in Truth...but in any case my point is ..that its not a relgious holiday..and its not holiday when americans celebrate food...although that can be debated haha :)..its a holiday (at least in my family when we come together and eat dinner...a big dinner i have to say :)...its a big thing in my house..because unfortunately my family dosen't eat together anymore...and nobody really cooks dinner anymore :) so i just wanted to clear up what thanksgiving is really supposed to be about...and that way we can prevent having any "thanksgiving threads" on this board haha :) oh and my family is half native american too..so its more than just following some dumb non-muslim festival blindly...this i guess if you want to call it is one of my favorite cultural things in america :) Adilah |
| Re: non)muslim festivals |
|---|
| jannah |
| 11/05/02 at 13:46:07 |
| [slm] hey in Ramadan we have "Thansgiving" every day .. ;) but seriously since everyone has that day off and everything is closed in the US it is nice to take advantage of it and get the family together!! |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| theOriginal |
| 11/06/02 at 12:43:15 |
| [slm] People raised in the Gulf vs. people raised in the subcontinent. Dunno which part of the Gulf you were raised in, or which people you hang out with, with respect to their relative locations, but my experience is entirely to the contrary of yours. My Saudi/UAE/Kuwait/Bahrain-born-and-raised desi friends, are BEYOND spoilt. The "desi" society in Saudi Arabia especially, lends itself very well to its members feeling "constrained"...Once they come out here to the West, their financial affluency, parental encouragement, and sudden "freedom" usually takes them on a rollercoaster ride, until eventually they learn to be grateful for things and plunge headfirst into another dimension. And as far as their aggregate respect for the religion is concerned...I plainly don't see it, especially when many of them have lived in that country for almost 90% of their lives, but can't speak more than 3 phrases of Arabic. (The word aggregate being the key phrase....in other words, I am not generalizing...some of them really know their stuff, mashaAllah) I think respect for the religion is instilled in you if your parents were careful to do so, regardless of your geographic coordinates. There is always a toss-up, and I think that people who have been brought up in Saudi Arabia, just really...don't wish to see it. I didn't mean any offence...I would continue to further elucidate what I mean...but I will wait for a response. Wasalaam. SF. |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| BUSHRA |
| 11/06/02 at 15:43:14 |
| [slm], As someone being raised in the gulf, Saudi Arabia to be precise, I have to agree with you. Sometimes when we have a certain ni'mah in front of us, we end up taking it for granted until it is taken away and only then do we realise how much we cherished it to begin with. [quote author=theOriginal link=board=madrasa;num=1036402983;start=0#11 date=11/06/02 at 12:43:15] [slm] My Saudi/UAE/Kuwait/Bahrain-born-and-raised desi friends, are BEYOND spoilt. The "desi" society in Saudi Arabia especially, lends itself very well to its members feeling "constrained"...Once they come out here to the West, their financial affluency, parental encouragement, and sudden "freedom" usually takes them on a rollercoaster ride, until eventually they learn to be grateful for things and plunge headfirst into another dimension. And as far as their aggregate respect for the religion is concerned...I plainly don't see it, especially when many of them have lived in that country for almost 90% of their lives, but can't speak more than 3 phrases of Arabic. (The word aggregate being the key phrase....in other words, I am not generalizing...some of them really know their stuff, mashaAllah) I think respect for the religion is instilled in you if your parents were careful to do so, regardless of your geographic coordinates. There is always a toss-up, and I think that people who have been brought up in Saudi Arabia, just really...don't wish to see it. [/quote] I've lived in jeddah since I was 18 months old and only moved away when I got married. Coming to London was a "roller coaster" and since there was so much FREEDOM, sadly I did take advantage of it, which is not something I'm proud of ::), but now I just think of those days as my Jahilliyya days :(. However no matter where or how you are raised , the bottom line is , in the end if ALLAH wants to guide you, there is no force that can stop the guidance. And the door of guidance is ALWAYS open. I know a lot of people raised in the middleeast who do their parents and this ummah proud, and steer clear of the temptations and I think that Mashallah sis. Safa is a good example of this breed which is becoming so rare these days . Reflecting back, I am grateful to Allah for the rollercoaster ride in a way, because it has made me stronger and given me true appreciation for the ni'mah of imaan. Like most of us, it is an imaan in progress :). Bushra :-) |
| 11/06/02 at 15:46:22 |
| BUSHRA |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| se7en |
| 11/07/02 at 11:08:33 |
| as salaamu alaykum, [quote]I think respect for the religion is instilled in you if your parents were careful to do so, regardless of your geographic coordinates. [/quote] second sis SF on that one. sister safa I get the same deal, "but you're in america now, you don't have to wear that/do that/abstain from that".. *sigh* the only thing I can suggest is just to have p a t i e n c e .. some people really don't know any better, and think that you are restrained, confused, narrowminded, etc.. and they think they're *helping* you. So just know that sometimes people have good intentions. but for those who are intentionally being mean, just be like.. look, faith has no borders, and it's not about where I'm from it's about what I'm *about*. please educate yourself before saying ignorant things. peace. 8) heheh.. take care :) wasalaamu alaykum wa rahmatAllah |
| 11/07/02 at 12:03:53 |
| se7en |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| Chris |
| 11/08/02 at 15:42:34 |
| Its probabuly just me, but if you disapoint your children at an early age unnessicrly they will rebel against you. Refusing to let them go to a party will just encorage them to do it in secret, eventully this leads to them getting into real trouble. Speaking for myself, I have grave doupts about the 'religousness' of anyone under sixteen. Let them live a little first before letting them choose wether or not to be muslim. if they feel no 'calling', just let them be. Following that, the year I first came to university I went out with my flatmates and ended up drunk. I had never been drunk before or drunk enough to feel the effects, so this was a rather unplesnt supprise. Now, there's nothing wrong, where I come from, In drinking, but after I had vomited in my sink and had an awful night I swore a mighty outh that I would never do it again - and I have not. Now, if you restrict your children, they will be tempted by the forbidden fruit and take a sip, and then anouther, and so on until they becoem addited. Hope this makes sense Chris |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| panjul |
| 11/09/02 at 01:55:22 |
| salams, speaking of drinking... reminded me of a story. someone i know caught her daughter smoking. so she made her smoke the whole pack right then and there in front of her until she threw up! and then the mother just walked away and never said a word about it. and the girl never picked up another cig again. ever. kind of interesting way of punishing ur child, eh? |
| Re: non-muslim festivals |
|---|
| pearl |
| 11/09/02 at 07:06:55 |
| [slm] Chris wrote: [quote]Its probabuly just me, but if you disapoint your children at an early age unnessicrly they will rebel against you. Refusing to let them go to a party will just encorage them to do it in secret, eventully this leads to them getting into real trouble.[/quote] When children are disappointed, they generally DO feel it is "unnecessary." They're kids, so they figure that if they want something, they are automatically entitled to it. That's why they have parents to teach them self-restraint and instill morality in them. It would be very confusing to a child to allow them to go to a Halloween party (or do something else forbidden by their religion) when they are 5, and then deny it to them when they are age 7 or 12. If children learn from an early age about right and wrong behavior and the reasoning behind it, it makes their lives much simpler. Will they rebel? Perhaps. But, it's less likely if they enter adolescence and adulthood with a firm understanding of their religion and the expectation that they will behave properly as Muslims. [quote]Speaking for myself, I have grave doupts about the 'religousness' of anyone under sixteen. Let them live a little first before letting them choose wether or not to be muslim. if they feel no 'calling', just let them be.[/quote] For believing Muslims (and Christians and Jews, for that matter) "just letting them be" and not "burdening" children with religious beliefs and obligations would be a terrible sin. What parent would risk dooming their children to hell just so the kids could "live a little" in this life? Muslims do not concern themselves with the question of whether or not a child has a "calling" to practice Islam. We believe that the natural state of the human being is to be a Muslim, i.e. to submit to Allah (God) (SWT). We also believe that it is an obligation to raise one's children as Muslims. If we fail to do so, we will have to answer to Allah for this. Having said this, the purpose of Islam is not to make children's lives a misery. Like their parents, they can enjoy themselves, and engage in parties and entertainments... but always within the limits. Pearl :-) |
Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board | <+tr>