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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| Rameeza |
| 12/09/02 at 11:49:25 |
| [slm] What is the reasoning behind allowing MEN to marry good women from the 'People of the book', but not women? It can't be due to the 'women must be obedient to their husbands' clause. I say this because, this says that in matters concerning Allah she should follow the right path and NOT go astray because of her husband. Jazaka Allah |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| theOriginal |
| 12/09/02 at 12:23:42 |
| [slm] Oh man so freaky. I just recently ran across an article that dealt with this issue. Apparently there was an Islamic WOMEN conference in Switzerland where they dealt specifically with women issues. All I know is that I found the article dealing with this on [url]zawaj.com[/url] but I was just searching for it, and I kinda gave up. Anyway the gist of the article, is that the reason is in the underlying basis of how we are to obey Allah. Men, to obey Allah (swt), must provide for their family, they must be the caretakers, the guardians, etc. (For whatever reasons this may be, I think in order to get into it, I'll have to digress from answering your question, so I won't.) Women, on the other hand, in the institution of marriage, must obey their husbands, rear the children, etc. If a man marries a Christian or Jewish woman, his Islamic duties as a husband, do not conflict with his general duties as a Muslim. He will still be able to provide for his family, be the caretaker, etc. However, if a muslim woman does so, HER islamic duties as a wife DO conflict with her general duties as a Muslim. If, for example, her husband tells her that she is not allowed to teach Islam to the children, or that she is not allowed to read the Qur'an, there will be some significant problems not only in her marriage, but also in her life. So by forbidding the woman from marrying non-muslims, it is a form of protection of one's imaan. Maybe that helped, but I'm glad you brought the topic up, because I want some answers too. Wasalaam. SF. |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| Rameeza |
| 12/09/02 at 18:44:15 |
| [slm] But, as I said earlier, EVEN if she marries a muslim, if he asks her to do things that go against Allah's wishes, she should not obey him. Allah has said that when it comes to her religion she need not obey anyone who is against HIM. So whats the difference between a muslim and a non Muslim guy??? |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| jannah |
| 12/09/02 at 21:47:53 |
| [slm] I think it's interesting that Allah knows our natures and knows how society works. I honestly think a husband has more influence over the family than the wife. I think men tend to dominate (whether that's a good thing or not) and I think women naturally want to please everyone in their family, especially their husbands. That's why sisters should be especially careful in who they marry because after marriage husbands and their families have alot of influence on them. Also, traditionally in the old world, when women got married they moved to their husbands families and adopted their culture/custom. So how would that work if you moved in with a NonMuslim family etc? It would be tough... |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| Tesseract |
| 12/09/02 at 23:46:34 |
| Assalamu 'alaikum wa Rahmatullah, Found this on understanding-islam.com. The answer is pretty close to what sis. theOriginal has said. Question: I was wondering if you could give me your opinion on inter-faith marriages and also on dating. Regarding the first part of the question, although the Qur'anic injunctions seem pretty clear as to the validity of a marriage between a non-Muslim man and women of the "book", is this only for the context of the Prophet 's time? Also why is it that women cannot marry non-Muslim men? Some people suggest that it is because religion passes through the man in Islam, however this seems to be coinciding with Judaism's view that religion passes through the woman. I can find no reference to this in the Qur'an. Answer As far as inter-faith marriages are concerned (especially marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man), please refer to one of my earlier answers to a similar question[1]. It should be quite clear from my referred answer that marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man has not been directly prohibited by the Qur'an. However, it has not been explicitly allowed either, as is the case regarding marriage between a Muslim man and a woman from among the Jews or the Christians. Those who hold marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man to be prohibited do not do so because "religion passes through the man in Islam". They may give a number of reasons for this prohibition, but the fact of the matter is that none of these reasons is based on the Qur'an or the teachings of the Prophet (pbuh). All these reasons are basically there own understanding and explanation of the issue. Furthermore, the prohibition - even in their eyes - is because of their interpretation of the related verses, not because of the reason that they ascribe to such prohibition. In my opinion, therefore, the real question is not "why" is the marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man prohibited, but it should actually be: "does the Shari`ah really prohibit such a marriage". The reference that he was talking about is as follows: Question: What is Islam's standings on: Non-Muslim man marrying a Muslim woman Muslim man marrying non-Muslim woman "Non-Muslim" refers to Christians, Hindus etc. Answer: A few aspects of your question are directly covered by the Qur'an , while in case of the others the matter would be decided by Ijtehaad. For instance, the Qur'an has clearly stated that: Women from the people of the book, that is Jewish and Christian women are lawful (in marriage) for Muslim men (Al-Maaidah 5: 5); and Polytheist (Mushrik) men and women are unlawful (in marriage) for Muslim men and women (Al-Baqarah 2: 221). Although the verses from which these directives are derived may be interpreted slightly differently. For instance, in the case of women from amongst the people of the book, one could be of the opinion that - the stated permission has been granted without any qualifications, that is, all Jewish and Christian women, under all circumstances are lawful to be taken in marriage by Muslim men; and - the stated permission was granted only when Islam became the dominant force in the region (the conditions prevalent at the time of the revelation of Al-Maaidah) and, therefore, the marriage with Jewish and Christian women is permitted only when the social and cultural values of Islam become the dominant values of the society in which the man and the woman, who intend to marry are living. In the same way, one may interpret Al-Baqarah 2: 221 as: - prohibiting all men and women with polytheistic beliefs, as the words might apparently suggest. This interpretation will mean that all groups present in the world that hold any form of polytheistic belief or indulge in any kind of polytheistic practice shall stand prohibited for Muslim men and women. According to this interpretation all the sects of Hindus, Christians, Jews and Muslims that, in the eyes of another sect, hold a polytheistic belief or indulge in a polytheistic practice shall stand prohibited for that sect; - prohibiting only those men and women for marriage who, like the Quraish of Mekkah and the Banu Ishmael, hold polytheism to be the true religious belief. This interpretation implies that a person may hold a certain polytheistic belief without ascribing to polytheism and without holding polytheism to be correct, as is the case with some of the Jews, some of the Christians and also some Muslims. No one among these three groups holds polytheism to be the correct religious belief but may due to some philosophical error or a misunderstanding indulge in polytheistic practices. This interpretation would mean that all those groups that ascribe to polytheism and hold polytheism as the correct belief and openly accept polytheism as their religious belief are prohibited for Muslims. Other groups that do not ascribe to polytheism although, due to any reason, hold and indulge in polytheistic beliefs and practices are not covered in this verse. According to this interpretation all those religions (or any sects of that religion) that hold polytheism to be the true belief shall stand prohibited for Muslim men and women. Many sects of Hindus that hold polytheism as their belief shall fall in this category; and - prohibiting only the men and women of the Banu Ishmael. That is, this verse does not prohibit all polytheists but actually prohibits marital and social relations with the Banu Ishmael only because of their particular position of rejecting the messenger of God who was sent to them. It should be remembered that according to the Qur'an the rejection of Banu Ishmael was not like that of any other group of the world. The Banu Ishmael rejected faith after [i]itmam e hujjah[1][/i] and because of that had to face the consequences of their rejection in the life of this world as well as in the hereafter. It should also be remembered that the word "Mushrik" has been used in the Qur'an basically for this group. This view shall imply that all the non-Muslim groups of the world - also including Hindus - shall now be given the same position as is given in the Qur'an to the people of the book - the Jews and the Christians. The case of a Muslim woman marrying a non-Muslim man - except that of prohibiting polytheist men for them - has not been directly covered in the Qur'an . One may hold the opinion that by permitting marriage between Muslim men and Jewish and Christian women, the Qur'an has also permitted marriage between Muslim women and Jewish and Christian men. While on the other hand, one may hold the opinion that by specifically mentioning the permission of marriage between Muslim men and Jewish and Christian women, the Qur'an has implied its dislike for marriage between Christian or Jewish men with a Muslim woman. As the above explanation would clearly show the issue could have various answers. A person should consider the reasoning of the parties holding these different opinions and follow the particular opinion that in his understanding is the strongest and closest to the directives of the Qur'an . [1] Manifestation of truth to the extent that no excuse is left for its denial or rejection. Wassalam. |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| eleanor |
| 12/10/02 at 00:41:46 |
| [slm] I always understood the reasoning behind this law was to protect the rights of Muslim women. If she marries a non-Muslim man, then she is not guaranteed her rights of maintenance, security and protection. Wa Allahu Ahlam |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| Rameeza |
| 12/10/02 at 13:46:38 |
| [slm] WOW! quite impressive. I actually did not know that there is no direct and explicit prohibition. You learn something knew every day. Masha Allah Yet, I remember reading a hadith when I was younger about a lady who converted to Islam during the prophet's [PBUH] time. She apparently let go of her husband after her conversion because he had not accepted Islam. [If any one knows this hadith and the name of the lady in question, please let me know] If, indeed, this hadith took place during the prophet's [PBUH] time, the silence of the prophet [PBUH] on this matter should make one feel that he was in agreement with her. Please comment. Rameeza |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| panjul |
| 12/10/02 at 18:23:47 |
| [slm] Also there is a hadith where the Prophet (S) said something like, ' a believing slave is better for your daughter than a non-believing man, and a believing slave woman is better for you than a non-believing woman.' I know a couple of marriages where the muslim men married non-muslim women and they were divorced later. Some women had accepted islam and after the divorce converted back to Christianiy, which left their children very confused. Many children were confused as to what to believe, whether Christianiy was true or Islam. Many decided to believe in God and follow neither Islam nor Christianiy. Others decided to follow Christianiy. and some decided to remain Muslim. One lady took the matter to the courts and said that Islam was a negative religion and had a bad impact on the children. the woman won the case and she has the children now. I dont think why anyone would take a chance like that, especially in these times. Also I recal reading somewhere that when the Muslims defeated the Romans, a man married a Christian woman and Umar (R) said to him something like, ' was there a shortage of muslim women?' And God knows best. |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| bhaloo |
| 12/10/02 at 19:39:39 |
| [slm] [quote author=Tesseract link=board=madrasa;num=1039452565;start=0#4 date=12/09/02 at 23:46:34] It should be quite clear from my referred answer that marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man has not been directly prohibited by the Qur'an. [/quote] What about this verse from the Quran? Quran 2:221 ....Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: a man slave who believes is better than un unbeliever even though he allure you. ..... Sheikh Munajjidd addresses the issue of a Muslim woman marrying a kafir (non-Muslim) man: It is absolutely not permissible under any circumstances in Islamic law (shari'a) of Allah, the most esteemed and exhalted, for a non-Muslim to marry a Muslim woman, as per what He has said regarding the marriage of a kafir (unbeliever) to a Muslim woman and vice versa: (interpretation of the meaning). They are not lawful (wives) for the unbelievers, nor are the unbelievers lawful (husbands) for them... (Al-Mumtahina:10) And Allah the most esteemed and exhalted has also said (interpretation of the meaning): Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe... (Al-Baqara:221) i.e., it is not ever permissable for someone to marry his Muslim daughter or sister or any Muslim woman for whom he is a guardian to a kafir. Islam must be exhalted and cannot be subjugated, so how could a Muslim woman be put under the care of a kafir man, when the man is normally naturally in a stronger position? In such a situation he could cause her to corrupt the practice of her religion or force her into subdual by causing her to live a life of oppression with him. He could also prevent her from practicing some of her religious rites. These are among the reasons for the aforementioned ban expressed in the previous ayaat. wallahu a'lam (and Allah is the most knowledgable). Islam Q&A Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid (www.islam-qa.com) |
| 12/10/02 at 19:40:57 |
| bhaloo |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| Rameeza |
| 12/10/02 at 20:04:49 |
| [slm] Great!! so the QUr'aan DOES talk about it. Now its clear. Jazaka Allah |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| Tesseract |
| 12/11/02 at 01:08:22 |
Assalamu 'alaikum wa Rahmatullah, My bad! didn't do enough research. InshaAllah, will try to be careful in future. JazaakAllah khair bro. bhaloo for pointing that out. Wassalam. |
| Re: Marrying non-Muslims??? |
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| Halima |
| 12/19/02 at 07:11:26 |
| Many thanks bhaloo for the clear quotes from the Q'uran. I agree with panjul. Why take a chance in this time and era? Imagine subjecting children in uncertainty. Yet, so many Muslim sister still do in the name of love. May Allah lead their heart rightly, INSHA-ALLAH. Halima |
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