Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Father @the birth??? |
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| Shahida |
| 01/22/02 at 05:55:19 |
| Salaam alaikum wr wb dear sisters (and bros) I just had a rather interesting discussion with one of the bros in my class at medical school. One of our courses this year is Obstetrics, and inshaAllah, we will each have to deliver 10 babies at least. The question that came up was: is the father allowed to be present at the birth of the baby? This bro I was talking to was telling everyone that it is HARAAM for a father to be present when his wife gives birth. This didn't make any sense to me, at all! May Allah forgive me if I am wrong. But the way I see it is this: NOBODY is allowed to look at the section of my body between the navel and the knee, EXCEPT my husband, under "normal" circumstances. So wouldn't the ideal situation be for the one who is allowed to see me, to deliver the baby. Rather than have someone else deliver the baby?? I need some sort of proof/daleel/evidence to support either view. This is important for us, not only as Muslims, but as future doctors, inshaAllah. If anyone knows of any websites dealing with Islam+Medical ethics, I would appreciate it if you would post them. Just as an aside though: sisters, were your husbands present at the births of your babies? Brothers, would you want to be there? Salaam Shahida |
| Re: Father @the birth??? |
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| Kathy |
| 01/22/02 at 09:34:08 |
| slm My Husband was present, but, I am really glad that my sister was there for the hard stuff. My husband was like a fish out of water!- * If you are going to have a c-section- tell your hubby not to watch- i heard it was awfully gross for him.... |
| Re: Father @the birth??? |
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| humble_muslim |
| 01/22/02 at 09:45:50 |
| AA I was there (twice). |
| NS |
| Re: Father @the birth??? |
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| BroHanif |
| 01/22/02 at 12:53:29 |
| AWW, [quote]is the father allowed to be present at the birth of the baby[/quote] Course his allowed, man his the husband. C'mon man think of all the emotions the wife is going through. The man was present at the start and he should be present right towards the end. Bringing a child into this world is not easy, one cousin of mine passed away in labour. [quote]This bro I was talking to was telling [/quote] And if this Bro is thinking like that, are any sane men really gonna allow their wife alone in the company of any man ? I think if your not there i.e. the man, it would have a serious effect on your future relationship with your partner. Salaams Hanif |
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| explorer |
| 01/22/02 at 14:34:25 |
| [slm] I must admit seeing birth delivery on those educational videos at school and university were bad enough and really made my stomach churn. Most guys feel like this. I think the reason stems from the fact that women have been given beauty and its hard for a man to come to terms in seeing a woman and her body in such an 'agony' state, if thats the right term to use. I think theres 2 points to a husband being present:- 1) Does the wife feel comfortable having her husband there? 2) Does he have the stomach for it?!!!! Anyway, what training/preparations must a husband have for birth delivery? Personally, I wouldn't know what to do, assuming I haven't passed out...;-D |
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| explorer |
| 01/22/02 at 14:35:11 |
| As per Shahida's request for daleel, this is what i found..... ---------------------------------- Question #9550: Is it permissible for a man to be present with his wife when she is giving birth? Answer: Praise be to Allaah. Yes, it is permissible for him to be present when she is giving birth, because it is permissible for the husband to see all of his wife’s body with no exceptions. Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and one of his wives used to do ghusl from janaabah from one vessel. (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 264). So there is nothing wrong with a man attending when his wife gives birth, so long as other women are not uncovered in the same place. And Allaah knows best. Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com) |
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| BroHanif |
| 01/22/02 at 17:24:10 |
| AWW, [quote]Does he have the stomach for it?!!!![/quote] He got her into pregnancy and its only right if he stays there. Forget the stomach churning or not. Think about your partner, how do you think she feels during her contractions!. [quote]Anyway, what training/preparations must a husband have for birth delivery[/quote] Go to all the baby classes and read up about it. Have some rest b4 the due day and pray to Allah for an easy labour. |
| NS |
| Re: Father @the birth??? |
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| Merimda |
| 01/23/02 at 21:10:53 |
| Salam I couldn't even watch those videos whenever they used to make us watch them in health class..I think I was like the only one to leave the room.. and I think explorer is right.. some women might not feel comfortable having their husbands around..I think I would probably feel awkward...but who am I to talk..I'm not even married.. salam, merimda [quote] I must admit seeing birth delivery on those educational videos at school and university were bad enough and really made my stomach churn. Most guys feel like this. I think the reason stems from the fact that women have been given beauty and its hard for a man to come to terms in seeing a woman and her body in such an 'agony' state, if thats the right term to use. I think theres 2 points to a husband being present:- 1) Does the wife feel comfortable having her husband there? 2) Does he have the stomach for it?!!!! Anyway, what training/preparations must a husband have for birth delivery? Personally, I wouldn't know what to do, assuming I haven't passed out...;-D [/quote] |
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| Jenna |
| 01/23/02 at 03:10:08 |
| [wlm] I believe when you think about it your stomach might turn, yet when you are actually giving birth and your husband is there/watching its the most unexplainable feeling there is!! My husband Alhumdulilah was there!! I did put him through things like "don't look at me etc.." lol, Yet when he would have to run to the car or get himself some coffee I was soo frantic, praying to Allah to make him come faster because having him there was like a security blanket! Having a baby is messy, but the experience, waiting for nine months to see your bundle, seeing your child birthed into the world, Allahs beautiful creation, well, that is the most awesome, scary, wonderful, beautiful feeling in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD!! So for those of you who have never experienced it before; mark my words: you will be the most happiest person on that day & wil be glad you were able to experience it!!!!! InshaAllah! :) :) Your Sis in Islaam Jenna :-) |
| Re: Father @the birth??? |
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| Shahida |
| 01/23/02 at 06:54:31 |
| Salaam alaikum I would personally WANT my husband there, inshaAllah. I don't know any woman who would be shy to have her husband present at the birth of their baby. I think it is important for him to experience *what* he can of the birth. JazakiAllahu khairun explorer, thats the Hadith I had in my head. Thanks for the effort! It makes sense, of course, that the husband would be allowed to be there, can't think of what this bro in my class was thinking. Salaam alaikum wr wb Shahida |
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| Anonymous |
| 01/23/02 at 20:50:05 |
| assalamu alaikum Doesn't any brother wish to be present at the birth so that he can make sure that the first words his child hears are that of the Adhan and words of Tawheed that he will recite in the newborns ear? Would like to be present simply for that reason alone in fact. wassalam |
| Re: Father @the birth??? |
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| MorningStar |
| 01/24/02 at 06:56:20 |
Salaams, My husband was present at the birth of our son, although he wasn't actually much use! :-) I know he wanted to be there but wasn't sure what the position was Islamically. When he asked the Imam at the mosque, I think he was told that it was Ok for him to be there, but it would probably be better to stay at the top end of the table with me, rather than down where everything was happening...to be honest I think my husband found it difficult enough being at my side, there is no way he would have gone to see what was happening at the other end!! :-) [quote]So wouldn't the ideal situation be for the one who is allowed to see me, to deliver the baby. Rather than have someone else deliver the baby?? [/quote] As I recall, my husband was the only person to almost pass out when watching the birthing video at parentcraft classes...he actually wanted to walk out of the room, but I wouldn't let him...so delivering his own baby would be totally out of the question! :-) |
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| Kathy |
| 01/24/02 at 09:33:59 |
[quote]... my husband was the only person to almost pass out...[/quote] Tee hee! It must be hard on them. My husband is a meat zabhia slaughter and it wasn't easy for him~ |
| Re: Father @the birth??? |
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| MuslimSis |
| 01/24/02 at 13:57:45 |
| as-salaamu alaikum:) i personally think the father should be there!!! As his dear wife is going through alot of pain, he cant share the pain but he could be there 4 her:) take care, w'salaam |
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| amal |
| 01/24/02 at 15:45:05 |
| slm, [quote] It must be hard on them. My husband is a meat zabhia slaughter and it wasn't easy for him [/quote] Huh! and they call us the weaker sex??? yeah right! Insh'Allah my hypothetical hubby will be there when the time comes...even if i have to chain him to the delivery bed ;) |
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