Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| This is a hype letter |
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| Anik |
| 01/31/02 at 21:43:59 |
| asalamu alaikum, This is from my city, and I think its hype! Toronto Star - Jan. 23, 2002 While out for dinner last week with colleagues, we sat beside three 20-something women. There was the usual posing and glances exchange, and as they paid their bill two Muslim women entered and sat nearby. Whispers were quickly exchanged and we could hear, "Why do they wear those things anyway?" ... "I feel sorry for them" ... and so on. As they filed out of the restaurant, we noticed they sported a mixed collection of the following: skin tight pants, short skirts, exposed midriffs, push-up bras, high heels, jewelry, see-through or plunging tops, piercings, lipstick and makeup, and one had breast implants for certain. We observed the two Muslim women as they were engaged in close conversation over coffee. Their graceful features complimented their dark headscarves and warm eyes. Their natural gestures were flirty without even trying - revealing natural beauty. And their clothes, while conservative, brought forth the hidden potential of something wonderful and truly feminine. The idea of dressing modestly terrifies some western women - but why? Perhaps it would trample their "right" to show off. Would their self-esteem fall along with their hemlines? After some debates, we identified the cost of the western "right" to flaunt. The Muslim women were free from the fashion trap -free to "just be" without posing, comparing, dieting and spending for the approval of men and each other. And they looked more desirable to us than the exhibitionists who were in the restaurant and parading on the sidewalk. The sexual displays in our culture are so mainstream and competitive that modesty is seen as regressive. Yet, long term, when a man looks past the right pants and heels, he will ultimately detect not confidence, but a certain unattractive desperation. Modest women don't have that desperation - they don't compete in the arena of vanity. They have themselves - and that's the kind of attraction with legs to last the long run. Remember that the next time you feel sorry for a Muslim woman. R. Stevenson North York aslamu alaikum. abdullah,. |
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| Seeker |
| 01/31/02 at 23:31:53 |
| [slm] subhanallah!! this was actually in a newspaper?? I never thought I'd ever read something like that in a newspaper!! I'm in soo much shock right now, was it real?? |
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| kiwi25 |
| 02/01/02 at 00:45:00 |
| salam, i got this as a forward, i think its just a story put in the paper, not a real one but just to let people know about muslim women wasalam nouha:) |
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| mujaahid |
| 02/01/02 at 11:38:04 |
| Its a great story, and so beautifully put! Abdullah how come you felt it was hype? |
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| MuslimaKanadiyya |
| 02/02/02 at 00:09:01 |
| assalamu alaikum, This article appeared in the paper on the only day last week when I didn't pick one up. :-( From the format, though, I believe that this was a letter written for the opinion page of the paper by a reader. (The reporters of the [u]Toronto Star[/u] all have e-mail addresses in their articles.) The fact that it wasn't in the online version of the paper reinforces this hypothesis. If someone actually saw it, please let me know if I'm right. Now, br. Abdullah, why would you think this is hype? If the fellow writing in had been Muslim, I would have wanted to tell him to lower his gaze, but since he isn't, I think that it is encouraging that some men do not find current female fashion appealing. I do not, however, see this a being 'hype', or anything even close to it -- what is it advertising? what position is it promoting? where is the evidence that the emotions described in the article are not genuine?.... Unless your definition of 'hype' is far removed from my own, I cannot bring myself to agree with you. Please, do explain your position more thoroughly. wassalam, Leslie |
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| momineqbal |
| 02/01/02 at 23:57:33 |
| [slm], [quote]Their natural gestures were flirty without even trying [/quote] [quote]And they looked more desirable to us than the exhibitionists who were in the restaurant and parading on the sidewalk. [/quote] How are you deluded by the Shaitan's whispers? |
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| MuslimaKanadiyya |
| 02/02/02 at 03:30:45 |
| slm [quote], How are you deluded by the Shaitan's whispers? [/quote] Who is the Shaitan deluding in this case? Could you please explain? As I said earlier, if the man had been Muslim, he should have lowered his gaze. Most men in and around Toronto, however, aren't, and I am now used to being stared at by them, as well as by the women. I have entered restaurants and everyone has stopped eating, turned around and stared at me as I walked through the door, because I am not what any of them ever expected to see. To wear hijab here means that a woman will be noticed. When I read this article a few days before br. Abdullah posted it on this board, it startled me that the women were critical of the Muslim women while the men were more open minded. Even so, R. Stevenson (whom I am assuming to be male) still does not overcome the constraints of his culture, and continues to interpret the Muslim women's gestures in the only way he knows how -- as elements of their sexuality. Obviously, if these women were unaware of their 'flirty' actions, they were not flirting with anyone. I would like to think that Mr. Stevenson and his friend noticed their [i]iman[/i], not only the confidence that he describes. North American culture is almost completely devoid of this concept, and therefore, we can hardly expect him to recognise, let alone explain [i]iman[/i] when he encounters it. Yes, his comments about the attractiveness of these women are inappropriate, and I have to admit that my stomach churned a little bit as I wondered whether or not one of the women he was watching so intently could have been me. Nevertheless, I think he is heading in the right direction. To believe that modest women are beautiful is no crime. In fact, I seem to remember reading that many of the men on this board want their wives to behave modestly, and find something vulgar in those women who do not posses this quality. In this respect, Mr. Stevenson, differs from many of you only in the manner that he expresses this desire, for he remains trapped in a cultural system that sexualises all, and wherein to be deemed desirable is all important. That he has the sense to criticise certain women for the lengths to which they will go to be found desirable is good. His conclusion that, "Muslim women were free from the fashion trap -free to "just be" without posing, comparing, dieting and spending for the approval of men and each other," is insightful and rather remarkable, coming from a non-Muslim. I can only hope that he may one day realise that by understanding the beauty of the Muslim women only in sexual terms, he cannot share in the freedom that he so admires in them. wassalam, Leslie |
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| momineqbal |
| 02/02/02 at 02:37:25 |
| [slm], I agree with sister Leslie. I probably was hasty in my comment. There is something positive in what is written. But it has to be balanced in what we do know of the ways of the shaitan and we need to just be careful. Wassalam, Eqbal |
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| MuslimaKanadiyya |
| 02/02/02 at 03:23:20 |
| assalamu alaikum, Brother Yahya Emerick says something about this in an article called, [u]The War of Women[/u], that I found after posting the message above: [color=blue]"The average non-Muslim woman sees nothing wrong with unmarried sexual relations, drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes, dancing with men, walking around half-naked, maybe taking drugs, gossiping, lying, using foul language, etc... (Who are all those immigrant Muslim men who race to marry such women and ignore their noble Muslim sisters?) While the Muslim woman, in Hijab, radiates the exact opposite! She doesn't engage in those things and rather tries to be humble, self-controlled, full of nobility and goodness and spiritually motivated. Non-Muslim women freak out because they feel so much shame deep down that they are so rotten and unclean! (Culturally-oriented Hijab-wearers don't threaten them much because they usually are rude, loud and without inner-purity, as well. There is a style of Hijab and a look of inner-purity which distinguishes the conscientious Muslimahs from all others. You can see Taqwa in a person's face!) A Muslim woman, whose inner-purity is reflected in her behavior, is more beautiful than even the most sensually dressed non-Muslim. So many men I know have said this, both Muslim and non-Muslim!" [/color] This is in the middle of a rather long article (by internet standards). If you are interested in reading the rest of it, you can find it [url=http://www.islamfortoday.com/emerick15.htm]here[/url]. wassalam, Leslie |
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| Sparrow |
| 02/02/02 at 07:23:28 |
| QUOTE: Non-Muslim women freak out because they feel so much shame deep down that they are so rotten and unclean! RESPONSE: give me a break. Peace, Sparrow |
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| MuslimaKanadiyya |
| 02/02/02 at 20:49:53 |
| assalamu alaikum, [quote] RESPONSE: give me a break. [/quote] You're right, Sparrow. I was really tired when I read the article last night, and didn't notice that particular phrase. Having been a non-Muslim woman, I believe I can safely say that Br. Emerick is assuming something here of which he can have no direct knowledge. If this offended you in any way, please accept my apology. wassalam, Leslie |
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| Sparrow |
| 02/03/02 at 18:26:45 |
| Hi Leslie, It is a bit offensive but I wasn't offended by *you* if that makes any sense. :) I've found that many Muslims (mostly those without much experience with Westerners) assume that Western women are all of loose moral character and "available," if you catch my drift and it drive me crazy. I'm no more "loose" just because I wear short-sleeve tops than a hijabi is oppressed because she covers. And, I hope people on this board don't think that about me! Peace, Sparrow |
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| BroHanif |
| 02/03/02 at 18:31:41 |
| Aww, [quote]I've found that many Muslims (mostly those without much experience with Westerners) assume that Western women are all of loose moral character and "available," if you catch my drift and it drive me crazy[/quote] Well I agree with you on this, its like get em drunk and take em home. It's amazing that when you talk to some people they can talk for hours, recently this has happened at work for me. I can speak to my work collegue and sometimes have a good conversation, I hope one day Allah gives him hidayat, his a sound bloke. Anyway enough of me, keep the peace Sparrow. Hanif |
| Re: This is a hype letter |
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| Anik |
| 02/04/02 at 02:19:30 |
| aslamau alaikum When I meant hype, its the local lingo-ish term, colloquial saying, for "Amazing, Cool, Wicked, Smashing, Loud, etc." And the article wasn't perfect, no sir/ma'am He was trying to shake the myth of the hijab being oppressive but the point was that modesty is a beauty in of itself the man who wrote the article (i think its a man) however cannot help but be himself when he still objectifies the woman. But it happens... i prsonally even think like him sometimes, hijab is more attractve in a certain sense. And yes, many people label Western women and generalize about them way too much and too far. aslamu alaikum. abdullah,. |
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