Need help from Pakistani sisters!!!

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Need help from Pakistani sisters!!!
gullob
02/10/02 at 17:06:22

Assalm-o-Alecum,
Maybe from brother's too;)
I thought i might as well give it a try as a last resort ..from my end atleast :) !
Okay now my problem is that i reside in Canada but i want to marry a girl in pak.
That won't seem like a problem, but i'm getting to that. I don't want to live in can any more and don't want to raise my family here( its my personal view so...) and infact in a few months i'll be moving back to pak for good.

So i want to arrange for the girl before i get back. Although my family is religious but not to that extent that they properly cover themselves(like hijab) so they are more interested in finding any girl whether she covers or not, but i only want to marry someone who properly wears a hijab and follows sunnah. Though my parents agree to marry anywhere i want to but how am i suposed to find a girl myself in such a coservative society? Also i have no sister that might help me in that matter, so that's where i need your help! The women living in western society won't want to live in a third world even if they are from pak, cause they could loose their "freedom" or just due to some other complex......anyways...

I know once i get back my parents are gona tie me with someone; who won't be what i really want but then i would have no choice :(  I know someone told me that you can force your wife to wear hijab after you get married but i don't want to force anyone into anything. I don't want someone to wear hijab or follow sunnah just to please me but to follow Islam.

For me Islam is not static or primitive, it was meant to be followed not to be kept behind closed shelves. Its not that you sit all day in the mosque and your Islam is complete, no it should show in our everyday life and be inspiring for others. You work in a scientific lab but still take the time to pray, that's real Islam!

I'm more of a revolutionist than a lame follower, i don't want to follow just stupid and non-islamic traditions and want someone whom i could support and she would support me.

I just don't want any girl, who wears hijab just because of some tradations but because she fully understands its importance in Islam and feels proud of it and don't care what other people say. Did i mention that cute would help too :D
Hey non-pakistani are welcome too but you can see what lies ahead ;)

I am 29y 5'10", on suffism side; ie. to make it more clear. Also if just walk in afghanistan, then no eye brow would be raised, if u know what i mean :D

I know someone's gona say "o he's nuts" , may be i am ;) otherwise who's gona leave the best country to live in the world ............. << yeah right! ..... lol....

Well i guess enough for now, so if someone feels insane enough to help then i would like to hear from you at gullob@yahoo.com :)

Salam and peace on the sincere followers.
Re: Need help from Pakistani sisters!!!
Kashif
02/10/02 at 17:34:58
assalaamu alaikum

"wa man-yattiqillah yaj-`al-lahu makhraja"
Whoever fears Allah, Allah will make a way out for him.

Have taqwa, make istikhara, make du'a. Speak to your parents. Get someone to speak to your parents.

And also open up your mind. It is definitely not correct to make the sweeping statement that sisters brought up in the West will not want to live in Pakistan because they don't want to give up their 'freedoms.' What makes one think that the desire to raise up a family in a Muslim country is only found in men?

I also find it astonishing to hear that a 29-yr-old-Muslim-brother-from-Canada is fearing a case of forced marriage.

My advice is that you have some sabr and wait till you get to Pakistan. Settle down, get to know people in your locality, etc. Coming from the West will most likely give you some prestige, making you a good 'catch' as a son-in-law. You'll probably have a number of people interested in marrying their daughters to you and then you can go from there, remembering that haste is from shaitaan and deliberation is from Allah.

I do pray that Allah grants you a spouse, who you are good for her, and she is good for you.

Kashif
Wa Salaam
NS


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