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| Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| Abu_Atheek |
| 01/05/03 at 23:50:17 |
| [slm] [u]Question:[/u] Can a woman love a man for Allah's sake, as it is mentioned in a Hadith that a man can love a man or a woman [can love] another woman for Allah's sake? [u]Answer:[/u] In an authentic Hadith, the Prophet lists seven people who will "enjoy Allah's shelter on the day when there is no shelter other than His." These include: "Two men who love each other for Allah's sake, they meet and separate with this bond between them." In another Hadith, the Prophet speaks of a believer who was on his way to visit one of his brethren. On instructions from Allah, an angel took the shape of a human being and stopped him as he passed by, asking him where he was heading. When he told him that he was going to visit his brother in the nearby village, the angel asked him whether he had any business interest with him, or he may be claiming a debt or he may want to have a favor, or to repay an earlier favor. To all these questions the man gave a negative reply. The angel then asked him why he was visiting him. The man answered: "Because I love him for Allah's sake." The angel said: "I am an angel sent by Allah to tell you that Allah loves you because you love your brothers." Both Hadiths highlight the important of having a pure relationship of love which is not motivated by any interest apart from a bond of faith which unites the two or more persons concerned. We note, however, in the first Hadith that the Prophet speaks of "two men." He did not say: "Two persons." We know, however, that all Islamic teachings apply to both men and women, unless otherwise specified. In other words, the same thing applies to two women loving each other for Allah's sake. It is not possible, however, that this sort of relationship develops between a man and a woman. This is due first to the fact that the natural attraction between a man and a woman is too strong to allow such a pure relationship to develop. It is only to be expected that once there is a sort of intimacy between a man and a woman which is caused by love or admiration, the natural desire may impose its color on it. Moreover, if either party or both are married, the relationship may lead to endless problems. That does not prevent a person to admire another person of the opposite sex for his or her dedication to Allah's cause. This must remain undisclosed because its disclosure may lead to problems. What we are talking about here is the sort of admiration one feels towards a person who achieves excellence in his field. Such admiration is not followed by social contact. The point about the possibility for a pure relationship of love for Allah's cause cannot exist between a man and a woman is that such love should normally lead to a stage of intimate relations which Islam cannot approve between a man and a woman. [url]http://www.ourdialogue.com/l12.htm#3[/url] |
| 01/05/03 at 23:53:17 |
| Abu_Atheek |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| Barr |
| 01/06/03 at 07:24:47 |
| Wa'alaikumussalam warahmatullah, Thanks, Abu Atheek for the article.... [quote]The point about the possibility for a pure relationship of love for Allah's cause cannot exist between a man and a woman is that such love should normally lead to a stage of intimate relations which Islam cannot approve between a man and a woman. [/quote] Allahu a'lam... but if I love Kathy's son, like my own son.. and if he grows up to be a young man, and whom I will see as my brother in Islam as well... would my love for him be wrong? I think there are many kinds of love, and the love between a husband and a wife, and the love between fellow Muslims, between family members, between our non-Muslim friends, between our teachers are different. Not all love are romantically inclined, though I do not doubt of its possibility. But if not loving someone for the sake of Allah is deemed impossible just because he/she is a person of the opposite sex... and to deny that such a pure love because of Allah exists, I feel, is so contrary to what Islam teaches. Allah never said it is haram to love a person of the opposite sex for His sake. Would the Prophet (saw) then, not love his ummah of the opposite sex? Or perhaps, a Muslimah's love for the Prophets and her other brothers are not really for the sake of Allah? Allahua'lam |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| Kathy |
| 01/06/03 at 08:34:37 |
| [slm] I know this wife, who has a terrible marriage but her hubby has many good points. They have an agreed upon platonic marriage with children. She does not love him in the marriage sense but has said that she loves him for the sake of Allah swt. I totally think this is possible. |
| Love (hRe: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| SisNur |
| 01/06/03 at 12:20:27 |
| [slm] & J/k Bro Abu_Atheek for the article ... [quote]It is only to be expected that once there is a sort of intimacy between a man and a woman which is caused by love or admiration, the natural desire may impose its color on it. Moreover, if either party or both are married, the relationship may lead to endless problems. That does not prevent a person to admire another person of the opposite sex for his or her dedication to Allah's cause. This must remain undisclosed because its disclosure may lead to problems[/quote] i have to agree on the point of undisclosing such matter. This happens to a friend of mine and it's definetely causing both parties problems. Sis Kathy wrote: [quote]She does not love him in the marriage sense but has said that she loves him for the sake of Allah SubHana Wa Ta`ala. [/quote] i have to agree with Sis Kathy on this too. I too, know of a wife who is in this situation. Allah knows best ... Wallahu'alam |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| muslimah853 |
| 01/06/03 at 14:03:02 |
| [slm] As someone else said, there are many different types of love. The world is not black and white. Going back to the time of the prophet [saw], I know he loved his companions, the men and the women. And they loved him, the men and the women. Certainly we can't make the claim that all of the women of the sahaba loved him in a romantic way simply because they happen to be of the opposite gender or vice versa. I know for me, there are quite a few brothers that I love, and I'm not the least bit ashamed to admit it. No, we don't hang out or talk on the phone or things like that, obviously, and I'm very happily married, but I know that these people have good character and I love it--the same way I love sisters who remind me of Allah. |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| AbdulBasir |
| 01/06/03 at 18:26:42 |
| [quote]Going back to the time of the prophet , I know he loved his companions, the men and the women. And they loved him, the men and the women. [/quote] [slm] This may not be immediately relevant to the discussion, but this reminded me of a hadith narrated by Anas ibn Malik in Bukhari and Muslim where the Prophet[saw] got up from his seat and stood up on seeing the women and children of the Ansar and proclaimed several times that they were the most beloved and dearest ones to him[saw]. In commenting on this hadith, Abdullah Adhami pointed out that Imam Bukhari included this hadith under the chapter of the virtues of the Ansaar and the men, so as to “include” the men amongst the honorees of this hadith, even though the text specifically refers to only the women and children of the Ansar. ;) [slm]:) |
| 01/06/03 at 18:54:55 |
| AbdulBasir |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| Emerald |
| 01/07/03 at 15:45:40 |
| [slm] Kathy, I completely agree with your comment! I'm sure there are alot of women out there who are just like your friend. Although I wouldn't say they love their partner for the sake of Allah (swt) but rather tolerate and give them their rights for Him. Emerald |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| Rameeza |
| 01/07/03 at 15:52:07 |
| [wlm] [shadow=red,left,300]TEXT[/shadow] Does this mean that this kind of thing is encouraged in Islam? Might be easy to say that it is possible but must be really hard for those in such a situation. I know that Allah will reward the sabr of these people but is Islam a religion that says that you should live in mysery without trying to improve your situation? I feel very sorry for people who might be in a loveless marriage. May Allah help them. Allahu a'alam |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| Rameeza |
| 01/07/03 at 15:54:18 |
| My above statement was with regards to the preceeding quote: My apologies, I had not pasted the quote. "She does not love him in the marriage sense but has said that she loves him for the sake of Allah SubHana Wa Ta`ala. " |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| Emerald |
| 01/07/03 at 23:03:53 |
| [slm] Rameeza, what you are saying is easier said than done. If there are children involved it's a whole other story. You have to be in that situation and know the circumstances. I find that it's really easy for people these days to say divorce but reality was never a bouqet of roses. I've known women who had no other choice and some did but they chose to stick it out. Emerald |
| Re: Love: For opposite sex for Allah's sake |
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| amatullah |
| 01/08/03 at 13:35:32 |
| I believe what the prophet of Allah [saw] implied in the above mentioned ahadeeth. There is differnt kinds of love yes. But once we think our love for the sake of Allah to the apposite sex is harmless, is when shaytan comes in to do his work may Allah curse him. I know someone who had problems with his brother and wife because they were all like we are brothers in islam and almost raised together so it is ok not to wear hijab, it is ok to be alone in a room, i almost raised him, and then a big problem happened. Even if you feel it is like your son or brotherly love, do not compromise the rules that Allah put on that relationship because Allah knows best, including all our kinds of love, and he didn't make exceptions unless like you breastfeed him. |
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