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wearing niqab: i need advice

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wearing niqab: i need advice
hiJabeeThug
01/19/03 at 21:54:30
In The name of Allah the most merciful the beneficent
Assalamalaiakum wa rahmatullah


respected sisters in islam

Inshallah i plan to wear niqab when i move to canada which is in 4 days inshallah!

the thing is that .... i'm 17 years old n people say i'm too young .... aren't we suppose to incourage people....

another thing is my mom don't wear niqab.... when me n my dad go places they think am his wife (sad face)

i'm going to live with my cousins .... and one of the boy is elder than me (THIS IS THE ACTUAL PROBLEM) i don't wanna cover my face 24/7 .... i talked to some niqabe sister they sed it depends ... on if i think if it's fard or not .... and i don't think its fard .... so they told me not to cover my face but cover my self in front of him ... help me please

jazakillah khair

Walaiakum assalam wa rahmatullah
Sister in Islam
me

Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
readagain
01/19/03 at 23:54:14
[slm]
well then just cover ur self up with hijab and all. I have lived with cousins and i didnt use to wear hijab at that time, and then i moved out of their house but whenever we are visiting , sleeping at their houses etc. im always wearing my hijab 24/7... ::)..it gets REALLY hot in summer!! thats why i stay indoors, and wrap myself up in Huge dupattas (not see through)  :-*..it wont be bad sister..Inshallah...Niqab as far as my little knowlegde goes is highly recommended but not fard (which means u get ajr for doing it but not gunnah for not doing it, wallahualam..<i researched on it few months back.. NOT GIVING OUT A FATWA HERE> anyways..so my point is go with hijab in the house and whatever u wish outside. <needs a shy smiley>
salama
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
Anonymous
01/21/03 at 17:57:11
[slm] sister,

honestly, anything you do for the sake of Allah, you know will be rewarded and Allah will
make it easy for you if you ask.  MashaAllah that someone of your age is trying to make
the effort to please Allah even more.  If your mind is set and you are ready, go for it!  
Shaitan always comes to us and puts doubt in our minds.  MashaaAllah you show such
maturity by this commitment, so don't let people tell you that you are young :)  You will also
find Toronto has many Niqabi sisters who will help you to feel more comfortable with your
decision.  If we take a step towards Allah, Allah will run towards us.  

May Allah make it easy for you, and may you be an example to us all.  Please keep us
updated :)

your sister in this beautiful deen
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
amatullah
01/21/03 at 22:57:21
[wlm]
Masha'Allah may Allah reward you and make it easy for you.

I have some questions for the sisters who do wear it. One is in terms of travelling what do you do when you wear niqab? or even anytime someone official needs to check on picture id you have to pull it up infront of everyone? What happens?
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
sister2sister
01/26/03 at 05:39:29
Salaams to all

>I have some questions for the sisters who do wear it. One is in terms of >travelling what do you do when you wear niqab?  

Life goes on as usual. The niqab does not limit a sister to her house or the mosque.  If she has to travel, then she dons her niqab and hits the road.  I know sisters who have gone to amusement parks with their niqabs.  Most


>or even anytime someone official needs to check on picture id you have to >pull it up in front of everyone? What happens?

in the case of identification, she can show her face.  Most people, companies, even authorities will allow for female employees to do the checking, if not, then there is no harm if she shows her face to a male as it's the intention behind her revealing herself.  Many will even go so far as to find a secluded spot for the sister, however, this kind of treatment depends on how the niqabee acts and treats the situation.  If she has a bad attitude, then that's exactly what she gets back, but if she has a good one and explains well, then she get good treatment by whoever is asking her.

As for the young niqabee to be, May Allah bless you and give you strenght to fight back all of the negative attention and bless you with all the support you will ever need.  As for covering in front of your male cousins, it's really up to you, if it's a burden on you and you don't feel it fard (niqab) then wear what is fard upon you in their presence.  If you feel it is fard upon you, then you must wear it, but pray to Allah to make the matter eaiser on you.

May Allah have mercy and protect us all

Your sister in Islam
 
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
Barraa
01/26/03 at 21:58:27
i hope its not too late sister to say that whether you wear it or not its all the deeds that matters. i was just reading a hadith that said "you become closer to allah through nawafil (voluntary stuff)" and niqaab is not obligatory, so its up to you. Inshallah if you are looking for deeds and not the weather you won't care about if its too hot sis, you gotta strengthen up. walahi let people think what thay wish. talk to your mom and tell her to wear it too if she's is comfortable with this topic but you see my opinion is you get closer to allah, weather, people, nom believers, age, laughs and all that junk should matter to you, i was 13 when i wore niqaab (well 2 months until i turned 13, just say 12) and walahi people think that i'm not my dads wife or anything they act as if i'm his pet! but walahi i am awaiting the day they will bite their hands, then i'll laugh! i'm getting out of the subject i guess.
well inshallah we'll talk soon
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
wafa
01/27/03 at 23:53:32
[quote author=Barraa link=board=sis;num=1043031270;start=0#5 date=01/26/03 at 21:58:27], weather, people, nom believers, age, laughs and all that junk should matter to you, i was 13 when i wore niqaab (well 2 months until i turned 13, just say 12) and walahi people think that i'm not my dads wife or anything they act as if i'm his pet! but walahi i am awaiting the day they will bite their hands, then i'll laugh! i'm getting out of the subject i guess.
[/quote]

 Appreciated !!
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
sadiyya
02/04/03 at 00:20:59
As Salaamu Alaikum;
My dear young sister, I commend you for your decision to wear niqaab!
We receive such extra blessings by wearing it, and I'm still learning about them! On the question of your cousin, I would observe "regular" hijab around him instead of the full niqaab, and try not to be in his presence too much also. Here we don't even think of marrying cousins, so I don't cover around mine, but then again my whole family isn't Muslim, either. If there is any possibility of marriage in the future, you must cover completely. But if there is not, or if you are not sure, stay away from doubt and cover the minimum possible. Either way, make istihara prayer and rely on what Allah(SWT) guides heart to do.
Love,
Sis Sadiyya
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
sista
02/08/03 at 22:10:59
[slm]

I started wearing niqab recently - although I cannot wear it on a permanent basis yet as my parents need to be further "broken in" to the idea... :(

I have to say - initially I had so many voices clamouring in my head - what are people going to think? Won't it impede dawah? What about ID checks? etc etc etc.  

Well, since I've started wearing niqab, stares are more prolonged, there has been a sharp escalation of the "Bin Laden" label (when are these guys going to figure out that Bin Laden is male??), also "Arab wid da bomb" and "Zorro" etc.  I've had assistants become really irritated when I need to use my railcard at a train station (more so when I quietly suggest a secluded place with a female staff member to verify it)...people at uni just can't understand it - the lines of puzzlement on their foreheads remould their patterns to form the word "Extremist!" which is soon transmitted to their lips or limbs or both in some form...and as for parents, well...(I've brought it up with my mom a couple of times...not working too well so far but at least she hasn't forbidden me to wear it...she just said to keep it out of her sight!)  Trivial or serious incident, the list goes on and on...

And you know what?  I'm barely even aware of it.  Because this is the first time I can remember doing something external that is not (I believe) obligatory, just for Allah, just for Him.  I FEEL its benefits like a refreshing breeze when I'm wearing it...not least of which is the blow it deals to my female vanity when I go out!

Frankly, I've just come to believe that the niqab - and in fact the hijab, among other such issues - really aren't that important, by which I mean not worth all the discussion that centres around them.  The standard niqab conversation for me goes something like,

"So why'd you cover your face when you didn't before?"

"I should have done before."

"Do you have to?"

"No."

"Then why do you do it?"

"Because Allah likes it better."  

"Oh."  Pause.  If it's a female, sometimes the conversation may extend to,

"Can I try it on?"

I smile, and oblige if  circumstance permits.  And go on working (or trying to work  ;D) through this journey called life quietly.

"Verily, with every hardship comes relief.

Verily, after hardship comes relief."

[Quran 94:5-6]


I pray that you, sister hijabeeThug, soon find the ease that Allah promised after the hardship that comes with trying to please Him.

[wlm]
02/08/03 at 22:15:59
sista
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
Ankabut
02/10/03 at 16:50:26
[slm]

Sista, your words really echo the situation in my own life. I too started wearing niqab recently and all sorts of questions/comments have been fired at me - bad for da'wah, extremist, fanatical, repressive, not suited for western environment, unnecessary ...  ::) you get my drift  :D

Alhamdulillah, my family, most of them are supportive but not a day passes that I ask Allaah to purify my intentions, in everything I do in fact, so that I am always reminded (when the stares and the comments get a bit much) that I have made this choice to draw closer to Allaah.

The aayat which you quoted:

"Verily, with every hardship comes relief.

Verily, after hardship comes relief."  

[Quran 94:5-6]

is surely applicable to muslims throughout the world, and in all situations. My brother has this interesting approach, he was asking me why I think ppl are bothered by a sister who covers while women who go around semi-naked are not even questioned. Hmmm  :-[ haven't figured out the answer  ;)

Sis Hijabeethug, may Allaah keep your intentions, in all your endeavours in your life, pure inshaa-Allaah.

Ankabut
:-)

Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
sista
02/10/03 at 21:14:14
[slm]

[quote]My brother has this interesting approach, he was asking me why I think ppl are bothered by a sister who covers while women who go around semi-naked are not even questioned. Hmmm haven't figured out the answer [/quote]

That question immediately brought the following excerpt from Yahya Emerick's "The War Of The Women" to mind:

You know, there's an interesting experiment you can try, and it may also save you from committing sins. Whenever a pretty girl walks by, almost every man looks at her, right? In Islam this is discouraged, for obvious reasons. But the next time you see a pretty woman walking by a stationary group of people, don't look at the pretty woman, (save yourself from a sin,) instead, look at the faces of the other women as the pretty woman passes by them. You'll be amazed to see that it's the women who are most blatantly and closely watching the young debutante prance by. And the glances of the women will follow long after the men have lost interest.

It's amazing! Women judge each other by their looks and appearances more than you would imagine. Especially non-Muslim women, who see the new female as a potential rival for male attention. When a Muslim woman, dressed according to her conscience, walks by, you see these same women grimace and make ugly faces. [i]Why are they so threatened by a covered woman even more so than a half-naked one?[/i]

Because the half-naked woman is only a rival for a man. The covered woman is a direct challenge to any woman's whole being, sense of self and way of life. A modestly dressed, covered woman is a walking, talking challenge to the women (and men) who are sacrificing their Akhirah for success on the terms of Dunya. A woman in Hijab who is a functioning member of society is a clarion call to everyone around her. She symbolizes a woman who is empowered by Allah (swt) rather than by the shabby, eclectic, pop-cultural, spiritually bankrupt throngs who pass as the icons of contemporary society.

The average non-Muslim woman sees nothing wrong with unmarried sexual relations, drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes, dancing with men, walking around half-naked, maybe taking drugs, gossiping, lying, using foul language, etc... (Who are all those immigrant Muslim men who race to marry such women and ignore their noble Muslim sisters?)

While the Muslim woman, in Hijab, radiates the exact opposite! She doesn't engage in those things and rather tries to be humble, self-controlled, full of nobility and goodness and spiritually motivated. Non-Muslim women freak out because they feel so much shame deep down that they are so rotten and unclean! (Culturally-oriented Hijab-wearers don't threaten them much because they usually are rude, loud and without inner-purity, as well. There is a style of Hijab and a look of inner-purity which distinguishes the conscientious Muslimahs from all others. You can see Taqwa in a person's face!)

A Muslim woman, whose inner-purity is reflected in her behavior, is more beautiful than even the most sensually dressed non-Muslim. So many men I know have said this, both Muslim and non-Muslim! Men love to run after the easy women for "conquests" but they want to marry someone who is pure more than anything else in the world! Non-Muslim women are filled with their shame/rage and it makes them attack Islam and things Islamic with a venom more deadly than any Orientalist ever had.


I rest my case  ;D

[wlm]
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
sister2sister
02/10/03 at 22:49:49
Salaam to all

>I too started wearing niqab recently and all sorts of questions/comments >have been fired at me - bad for da'wah, extremist, fanatical, repressive, >not suited for western environment, unnecessary ...   you get my drift

Got it!! It really ticks me off when so-called muslims try to convince others to un-cover >:(  Really, I get more compliments from non-muslims than muslims!!! Go figure that one out :P  

YSII :-)
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
Anonymous
02/12/03 at 02:05:14
Assalamalaikum wa rahmatullah

for some reason ma user name don't exist n e more .... n e wayz ...alhumdulillah i'm in
Canaduh. i don't like it here but oh well ..... at least i get free food n free place to
stay ..i jus don't like ma cousins .... don't wanna backbite.... i go to mci (middlefield
collegiate institute) n da journey was kinda bad cuz ma brothers car skit in New york =(
alhumdulillah we are safe... then in canaduh's border his car got frozen up ....  n tha's
bout it tell da rest of the story later cuz am sleepy n people were worrying since they
haven't heard of me since a long time ..... ok yeah nite nite

Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah
Allah hafiz
Hijabee thug

[Admin note: Sister please email us so we can fix your login problem: jannahorg @ yahoo.com]
Re: wearing niqab: i need advice
hamdi
02/26/03 at 04:22:43
[quote author=hijabeeThug link=board=sis;num=1043031270;start=0#0 date=01/19/03 at 21:54:30]... help me please[/quote]

dear sis, maybe the experiences an the story's of other niqaabi's on this website will help you: http://hijabsahih.tripod.com/


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