A R C H I V E S
Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Would you? |
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| tq |
| 02/25/03 at 09:17:21 |
| Assalamo elikuim If you(sis) going alone in car and see a brother needing help(may be you dropping him somewhere etc), would you stop and give him the ride? Yesterday I was going to masjid for dhur(was runnig a little late as usuall :) ). when I took the exit I saw a car with emergency lights on. I saw muslim brother(beause he had a beard and had a checked scarf around his shoulder) trying to start the car. I slowed my car but I wasnt sure if I should help him beside letting him use my cellphone. I passed him thinking any way I am going to be late for jammat and I am alone etc etc.... but then i thought to myself that helping a muslim is more important , i turned and came back on the highway but by the time I reached where the car was I saw that the car was started and he drove by. I also noticed that there was a sister also sitting next to him. I would have stopped the first time if I would have seen the sister but since i only saw the brother i wasnt sure. What do you sister would have done ? Also if it would have been other way round i.e. you(sister) needing ride and your only option is to either take a public transportation(for which you have to walk a coiuple of blocks to get to the bus stop) or a brother offering you ride- what would you do? Wasalam tq |
| Re: Would you? |
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| jannah |
| 02/25/03 at 11:49:17 |
| [wlm] I think it's kind to offer, whether or not he feels comfortable with it is up to him. Same as if a brother offers to give you a ride, it depends on how comfortable you feel, how old, where ur sitting etc etc. |
| Re: Would you? |
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| sofia |
| 02/25/03 at 15:26:13 |
| As-salaamu 'alaykum wa rahmatullah, The only time I was ever stranded on the side of the road by myself was while driving to a friend's in northern VA over the summer, and ran out of gas (thinking I'd make it, although duh, never test your 'E' guage). Alhamdulillah, it was during the daytime. And although I was stuck on the highway, there was a woody/grassy shoulder-area to be away from the oncoming traffic. I was slow to catch the "cell phone" train, but I'm glad I did, walhamdulillah, for situations like that. The only person who stopped to see what the problem was before the AAA guy came, was an older Muslim brother. Actually, he probably didn't even stop because I was a Muslim, since I was sitting kinda behind the car, reading something while I waited, and I don't think he saw me until he got out of his car, wAllahu A'lim. I didn't really need his help, but thanked him and continued to wait for AAA (which came soon afterwards, walhamdulillah). But the fact that someone would stop to see how you were doing on the side of the road, that says something, mashaa'Allah. Anyhow, Allaah is the best of Helpers. If you have some type of road-side assistance, you really don't need anything else except a cell phone. And I'm assuming a minor situation (like a minor accident, tire problems, out of gas, etc). So that's why I'd suggest offering your cell phone (if you have one) to someone stranded with car problems, rather than drive them somewhere (if an unrelated male/female have to be together by themselves in a car, try to avoid it, Muslim or not. Also depends on other things, like the severity of the issue. If he had to get to a hospital, for ex/, that issue wouldn't be on my mind). On the flip-side, if I had other means, I normally don't take the offer of a male (Muslim or not) giving me a ride (if we were by ourselves, and there was no emergency). Anyhow, so if I hadn't had that experience, I probably would've just answered, "Nah, just drive by and make du'aa for him." But I'm thinking if we need help (and we should always seek Allaah's help first), we'd all be pretty happy to see a Muslim there for us. Allahu A'lim. |
| NS |
| Re: Would you? |
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| AyeshaZ |
| 02/26/03 at 23:51:29 |
walaikum aslam, I think i would be really really hesitant if i was by myself or the bro was alone.. however if its like an older bro i would probably stop.. If a bunch of sisters are riding with me, i would stop.. or if i really thought the bro needed help ??? Cell phone is must while driving !!!!! and a membership with AAA !!!! |
| Re: Would you? |
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| a_Silver_Rose |
| 02/27/03 at 16:26:53 |
| [wlm] I would definately stop, although I would not let him ride with me if I was alone. If he didnt have a cellphone then I would let him use mine. I would try to call my dad or some brother to help him. I would do something, anyway, not just drive by. The problem is that people talk around here alot and the muslim brothers wil not help if they see you stranded, more likely you are going to get help from a nonmuslim brother. this is the big problem, I think they should atleast stop and help and if the car is not fixed then they can wait with you until someone comes, Insh'Allah... |
| Re: Would you? |
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| Shahida |
| 02/28/03 at 06:39:28 |
| [slm] I dont drive, so cant really comment...BUT if I did drive I would defintely not just drive by...I would ask if he needed to use my phone. Reminds me of a story, little different, but for me unforgettable cuz of the way I felt about the people involved! We are quite a few Muslims at our medical school. But everyone knows everyone almost. One winter evening it was almost dark when a sister missed the bus and stood at the entrance of medical school praying that someone she knew would drive past. She didnt have a phone, she didnt even have a phone card (normal coin phones all not working, as usual). It was a long time before she saw a car approach, as almost everyone else had already left. There were 2 brothers in the car, one driving, one in the passenger seat. She recognised them as being in her class, and the driver even lived 3 streets away from her, their fathers were friends. Sooo, what did these brothers do? They saw her, turned their faces to look straight ahead, and drove off!!! :( NOt a "salam, do you have a lift?", no "salam, do you need to call someone, we have cell phones", no nothing. By that time it was already dark, and they just drove off, because you know, they don't talk to ghair-mahram women. So someone can be raping you in the middle of the park and they would drive by, because talking to you and asking if you are ok violates what Allah expects from the believing and pious amongst us. yeah, right, may Allah help us! So she ended up waiting there, crying because the security men had started to interfere with her, until a Christian friend drove by, and offered to take her home. Alhamdulillah. I believe that Islam sets boundaries for us to follow, alhamdulillah, and they are protective of our chastity, honour and reputation. But how hard is it to ask if someone needs help? You dont need to let that person get in the car with you, they probably wont want to either, but the point is to make sure that they are not stranded, and not in a position where harm can come to them. What if the security men had done something to her? She still cries when she tells me about that night. Ok, my venting for the day. Salamat Shahida |
| 02/28/03 at 08:58:01 |
| Shahida |
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