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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| Caraj |
| 06/26/03 at 13:50:52 |
| Ok, I have been doing much thinking about three topics and want some imput on them even if we already did a post back like a thousand years ago ::) on them These three are not to start a contravercy, (I can't spell that word) but for learning,seeking, exploring and such. 1) Converts? Why on earth would Allah want a woman to leave a perfectly good marriage with a man who supports her wonderfully emotionally and financially and who loves her dearly and treats her well and with great respect and does not hinder her beliefs just cause he does not also convert? I like Jannah idea of speaking with an Imam. Look at what poor silveroses friend is having to deal with. Ok my brothers and sisters please forgive me if I am rough around the edges and Allah forgive me if I am wrong But I am not leaving my husband. 2)Covering, I have always been a modest dresser, I am not into halters, shorts and such. I agree to long and lose fitting dresses and skirts and such, I can even deal with the scarf. However is it culture or what that has a women totally covered? Are there ways to cover differently at pray vs every day. Is it culture more than Islam that makes the difference over scarf vs full face and head gear. (for lack of a better way of putting it.) Women are not to dress like men and visa versa, But if you are working horses or gardens or building fences and shelters are jeans not ok if no one but close family is not around? 3) Dogs? I understand about being unclean and such. I have a thought, question and theroy and would like feed back. Back 1,000 and 1,500 yrs ago dogs ate raw meat and dead stuff and whatever they could find. That causes bacteria in the mouth. Now we have dog food. I know breeders today that are big on raw meat and old time dog diets but ones with kids won't do it cause of the bacteria. Also back then clean water and soap and anti bacteria soap and bleach were not available. Thank you for your thoughts, views and verses on these matters. |
| 06/26/03 at 13:52:50 |
| Caraj |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| Danyala |
| 06/26/03 at 20:25:29 |
| [slm] Sis cara, I am in no way anywhere near a scholar or even someone learned....but just thought i would share my thoughts.... Firstly I would like to stress that we (humans) are not always told the reasons behind the rules...sometimes its beyond us...or will be disclosed as technology progresses. (eg why we cant eat pork etc). 1. males tend to have more influence over females and that is the reason why the muslim males are allowed to marry non-muslims yet muslim females are not allowed to marry non-muslims. Similarly, i would imagine, the same would apply to an already established marriage - your husband would be more likely to influence you than you would him....dont know if that makes sense but i agree best to talk to an imam. 3. just a comment on the dogfood part - i was having a conversation with someone at work last year and i was amazed to learn what kind of things actually go into cat and dogfood!! :o lets just say we dont always know wot goes on - remember the mad cow disease??? Take care, [wlm] :-* |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| Yousef |
| 06/26/03 at 21:42:53 |
| First of all, I admit that many of my posts seem to be alittle [i]off[/i] as compared to others :D Be being off, doesn't mean im right and eveyone else is wrong, it's just a little [i]off[/i], and it's good to hear diffrent points of view. My post may seem a little harsh, and I apologize in advance. "Whatever the Messenger gives you, accept it; whatever he forbids you, refrain from it." (59:7) ... Furthermore, in many instances in the Quraan, it is asked: "Do you know better, or does God?" and then answers it: "God knows and, you do not know", and "You have been given only a little of the (true) knowledge"... "Does He Who created not know His creatures? He is the All-Subtle, the All-Aware." (67:14) It is not the function of Islam, and thats what makes Islam very unique to provide justification whatever kind of life someone is leading and to bring an authority which he can use to justify his actions. Rather Islaam is to be a criterion, to approve what is good and to discard what is evil. If at any time you think that their might be some good is something that is going against what Allaah has legislated, then first of all, they you are deluded in your thinking, "they follow but speculation and their own desires, although guidance has come to them from their Sustainer. Or shall man have whatever he fancies? And to God belongs the first and the last." (53: 23-25) And again I will raise the question which Islaam raises itself, and which it answers; that is, "Do you know better, or God?" and, "God knows, and you do not know." Converts: The ruling is pretty clear on this subject, and I didn't hear any diffrence on this issue "… do not send them back to the disbelievers—they are not lawful (wives) for the disbelievers nor are the disbelievers lawful (husbands) for them…" (Al-Mumtahinah 60:10). The ruling of the marriage is suspended, until the 'idah is over (transitional stage between being married and divorced, which is four months). After that period ends, your divorced. It's over. "But no, by your Lord, they have not believed until they make you judge regarding their disputes, and then do not find any resentment in their hearts against your verdict, but submit in full submission." (4:65) Now let me ask you this, look in your husband's eyes and just think for a minute, this [color=green]man who supports me wonderfully emotionally and financially and who loves me dearly and treats me well and with great respect[/color] on The Day "That Day shall a man flee from his own brother, And from his mother and his father, And from his wife and his children. Each one of them, that Day, will have enough concern (of his own) to make him indifferent to the others. Some Faces that Day will be beaming, Laughing, rejoicing. And other faces that Day will be dust-stained; Blackness will cover them: Such will be the Rejecters of Allah, the Doers of Iniquity" ['Abasah 80:24-36] That man will be in Hell, “They sill long to get out of the Fire, but never will they get out therefrom; and theirs will be a lasting torment” [al-Maa'idah 5:37]...While you will be “Their reward with their Lord is ‘Adn (Eden) Paradise (Gardens of Eternity), underneath which rivers flow. They will abide therein forever” [al-Bayyinah 98:8] Just give it a little thought, you may be forgiven. But what abuot your [i]loving husband[/i] Covering: Concerning the full-face cover and just the scarf, there is a diffrence of opinon weather its obligatory to cover the full face. There are two opinions, one which says its obligatory to cover the full face (and I can provide detailed evidence) and ones who say that its high recommended but not obligatory i.e you are not transgressing if you don't cover your face, but it's highly recommended. So it's not a cultural thing. Dogs: Again read the beginning of the post, it is very clear. You can keep a cat, a cat is clean and from my experience no matter how [i]clean[/i] a dog can be, it's still dirty especially with the dogs than hang their tongue out and dripping. But that's just my view. |
| 06/26/03 at 21:45:33 |
| Yousef |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| se7en |
| 06/27/03 at 11:06:54 |
| salaam cara, I was so happy to read your questions :) because only people who are really seeking to understand, explore, and consider ask such tough ones :P You know, the word for 'islamic law' in Arabic, [i]Shariah[/i], comes from a root that literally means, 'the path to the source of water'. All the islamic legislation that governs our daily lives.. our interaction with people, the way we marry, do business, learn, travel, etc etc etc.. are all intended as a *means*, or a road, to bring us closer to the source, Allah. I think sometimes though, we (both Muslims and non-Muslims) get caught up in the path or the road, and forget about the source :) What I'm trying to say Cara, is that.. Islam has so many guidelines for how we should live our lives.. but these guidelines are only to help us in our path to God. If you truly believe in God, that He is the Merciful, the Creator, the Guide.. that He is the artist of the majesty of the masterpiece of the world.. that there is divine order to the chaos that we see in everyday existence.. if you believe that He alone is worthy of our worship and devotion.. and if you believe that Muhammad, peace be upon him, was divinely chosen, and came with a message similar to the prophets who came before him like Adam, Jesus, Abraham... then you *are* a Muslim :) You just haven't admitted it yet ;) All of us struggle with something.. and there will always be things in the tradition that we need more time to explore, understand and accept.. and this is true even for people who have been Muslims their entire lives. But if you accept this core message, that I mentioned above.. you have found The Source :) and it's just a matter of getting on the road ;) [quote]1) Converts? Why on earth would Allah want a woman to leave a perfectly good marriage with a man who supports her wonderfully emotionally and financially and who loves her dearly and treats her well and with great respect and does not hinder her beliefs just cause he does not also convert? I like Jannah idea of speaking with an Imam. [/quote] This is one of the toughest issues, that many converts, both men and women have to face. I definitely second Jannah's idea of speaking with an imam, someone a bit more wise and discerning than us on the board :P The reason I say this is because, this is obviously something SUPER important... of *course* you are going to want to stay with your husband, especially if he is kind and supportive. And this is an issue in which there is room for flexibility, according to many scholars. (For those of y'all who want to hear the fiqh, send me a madina msg) What I can tell you is, you can certainly still be Muslim and stay with your husband. Again, I really very strongly encourage you to talk to someone a bit more knowledgeable on this issue, because it's not as clear cut as some of us may make it out to be. [quote]2)Covering, I have always been a modest dresser, I am not into halters, shorts and such. I agree to long and lose fitting dresses and skirts and such, I can even deal with the scarf. However is it culture or what that has a women totally covered? Are there ways to cover differently at pray vs every day. Is it culture more than Islam that makes the difference over scarf vs full face and head gear. (for lack of a better way of putting it.) [/quote] One of the things I find so amazing about Islam is that it has this solid but flexible nature.. where there are guidelines perscribed for our well being, but there is also room for diversity, and for us to just be ourselves and express our own personalities and backgrounds and culture and stuff. So yes, you see such a broad range in covering-styles in the Muslim world due to culture.. the modest way men and women dress in India and Pakistan is different than for Muslims in China, and for Muslims in the Middle East, and for Muslims in Africa, and for Muslims in the United States. They share the same guidelines [covers, is not see-through or form-fitting, etc] but again due to culture, ethnicity, and personal flavor :) there are differences. Also, as was mentioned, that is a minority opinion among scholars that part of the guidelines for women's dress is to cover the face, and not just your hair and chest. As long as you are fulfilling the guidelines.. [for me usually a long skirt and top, and a scarf].. you can pray just as you dress everyday. I know in some cultures, people have special clothing for prayer, but this is just due to show reverence for the prayer. [quote]Women are not to dress like men and visa versa, But if you are working horses or gardens or building fences and shelters are jeans not ok if no one but close family is not around? [/quote] Hm.. if by close family you mean your sons, daughters, your husband, etc you can dress any way you want! Jeans and trousers are one of those things that scholars differ on. It really depends on whether they are "masculine" or not. I wear loose fitting pants/jeans sometimes, and I don't think they are in imitation of males because they are a different style. I think, as long as your intention is not to look masculine, and obviously because you are doing work that requires such clothing, you are okay :) [quote]3) Dogs? I understand about being unclean and such. I have a thought, question and theroy and would like feed back. Back 1,000 and 1,500 yrs ago dogs ate raw meat and dead stuff and whatever they could find. That causes bacteria in the mouth. Now we have dog food. I know breeders today that are big on raw meat and old time dog diets but ones with kids won't do it cause of the bacteria. Also back then clean water and soap and anti bacteria soap and bleach were not available. [/quote] I just took a look at the thread (I'm posting as I edit) and sis sofia answered this after me.. Okay chica.. I hope I've been of some help :) Please keep the questions coming, and let us know your thoughts. Take care :) salaam, se7en |
| 06/27/03 at 11:26:38 |
| se7en |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| sofia |
| 06/27/03 at 11:20:41 |
| As-salaamu 'alaykum wa rahmatullah, [quote]1) Converts? Why on earth would Allah want a woman to leave a perfectly good marriage with a man who supports her wonderfully emotionally and financially and who loves her dearly and treats her well and with great respect and does not hinder her beliefs just cause he does not also convert? I like Jannah idea of speaking with an Imam.[/quote] Definitely check with an Imam or scholar, nothing we say is meant to be taken as a ruling for your case. Generally, even a man is not encouraged to marry a non-Muslim woman unless she is 1) from the People of the Book, and 2) she is inclined to Islaam. She would, after all, be the main "teacher" of her children. If she does not end up converting, the husband is obliged to teach his children Islaam. But the fact remains, it is allowed, and alhamdulillah, so many women have come into Islaam this way, creating greater bonds of family ties amongst people who would have otherwise never interacted with each other, let alone shared their faith. There will always be some men who can easily be influenced by their wives. This is normal. Islaam protects a Muslimah and her children from any physical compulsion to renounce her religion, her dress code, her way of life, basically, so he can't use his "emotional or financial" support against her. That's why it's so important for Muslim women to not only choose a Muslim man, but a true, believing Muslim man to marry, since even a born-Muslim can make things difficult on his family if he is not accepting of Islaam. We've all seen some examples of that. God knows best, these are just general guidelines. Definitely speak to someone knowledgeable who can advice you in specifics. This general guideline doesn't detract the fact that Islaam actually promotes marriage amongst different tribes/nations/races, but faith is the most important factor. [quote]2)Covering, I have always been a modest dresser, I am not into halters, shorts and such. I agree to long and lose fitting dresses and skirts and such, I can even deal with the scarf. However is it culture or what that has a women totally covered? Are there ways to cover differently at pray vs every day. Is it culture more than Islam that makes the difference over scarf vs full face and head gear. (for lack of a better way of putting it.) [/quote] That's awesome, Cara, modesty is part of faith. The Prophet (p) asked that women, after the age of puberty, cover everything except the hands and face. Even Muslim males in traditional societies are covered from head to foot. Modesty is a general feature that every one is born to lean towards, but they are sometimes taught to do otherwise as they grow older (an ex. of this is when you ask pre-pubescent children to form groups; they're always separate by gender themselves!). Some scholars stipulate that Muslim women can further emulate the Prophet's (p) wives by wearing the face veil. However, there is a difference of opinion on this as an obligation, and the head-cover (and loose clothing) alone can be sufficient according to one view. Allahu A'lim. I was just speaking to someone about how different some Muslim societies are today from the Muslimahs during the Prophet's time. Some of them even participated in battle! All while covering modestly. Btw, the only people you have to cover in front of are "strange/unrelated men," which include men who are not your husband or sons or father or father-in-law, etc. So if you've got some private land, you may want to take an outer covering just in case, but if no one sees you, it's all good. And trust me, most women start off slowly. So maybe begin with covering the legs first. And then maybe wearing long-sleeves after a while, and then maybe a longer shirt/tunic over your pants or skirt, and then the headscarf. If you can do it all at once, then mashaa'Allah, may Allah keep you steadfast in any case. And by the way, since there are so many cultures that practice Islaam, there are many different styles of covering that are acceptible. From the long tunic/pants/scarf (Indo-Pak-Malay style), to long dresses, to cloaks, or whatever else you feel comfortable in. So no, we don't have to wear all black, in case someone asks. :) [quote]3) Dogs? I understand about being unclean and such. I have a thought, question and theroy and would like feed back. Back 1,000 and 1,500 yrs ago dogs ate raw meat and dead stuff and whatever they could find. That causes bacteria in the mouth. Now we have dog food. I know breeders today that are big on raw meat and old time dog diets but ones with kids won't do it cause of the bacteria. Also back then clean water and soap and anti bacteria soap and bleach were not available. [/quote] Allahu A'lim, dogs are fine to keep, as long as they're used for farming, herding or hunting (and some scholars say for protection, like a guard dog), and they're treated well. So dogs are not completely off-limits. Actually, in the situation that this comes up in, the Prophet (p) stated that the Angels of Mercy do not enter homes which have dogs or images (pictures/statues of anything with a soul). There are other ahaadith about dogs, but the choice is up to us. Do we want Angels of Mercy in our homes? Anyhow, it may have something to do with disease, but it should be looked at as more of a command from God, kind of like not eating pork or drinking wine. There is some good in it, and there is some bad. There may be other stipulations, but the point is, the Prophet (s) advised us to not keep dogs within our own homes, and to wash our clothing/vessels/skin if the saliva reaches it. We can touch dogs and take care of them, given these safeguards. Many Muslims feel like they aren't obliged to treat dogs and pigs kindly, but this goes against the sunnah of the Prophet (p). There was a time when the Prophet (p) led an expedition towards/away from battle and he encountered a dog and her pups alongside the road. He ordered someone to stand guard over/protect it while expedition passed, so they wouldn't be harmed. Subhan'Allah. Imagine his treatment for his [i]people[/i], let alone animals. And there is reward for taking care of animals. :) Allahu A'lim/God knows best. Keep asking more questions if you have them. If we don't know, we'll try to point you in the right direction, inshaa'Allah. [Sorry for the repetition, just read most of se7en's points after posting this] |
| 06/27/03 at 11:30:43 |
| sofia |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| eleanor |
| 06/27/03 at 11:28:29 |
| [slm] Cara :) I couldn't get the dog thing at the beginning either. After some thought and enlightenment from Allah I got my head around it. In my family we nearly always had a dog. When I was little I asked why does the dog always pant when he is hot or thirsty. Answer - dogs sweat through their tongue and nose. This is a fact. So... how can you justify having a dog who is licking everything - some people let him lick their face :P To me this can be compared to a human rubbing his armpit or other sweaty body part all over my face and hands :P :P :P Quite apart from that dogs always have their noses in some sort of dirt and faeces. So they run around outside - stick their noses in some other dog's mess and then come and rub their face in the palm of your hand.... nasty eh? I also found out that pigs *don't* sweat at all. So all the toxins that other animals and humans get rid of in their perspiration remains inside of the pig in his flesh and blood. This is probably why pork is scientifically very very bad and dirty. W'Allahu Ahlam. (and Allah knows best). |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| a_Silver_Rose |
| 06/27/03 at 18:30:34 |
| [slm] 1.) [quote]It is obvious that had Islam not recognized the status of existing marriages, all those who accepted Islam at the call of the Prophet (pbuh) would then have been directed to renew their marriage contracts with their spouses (including, obviously, the Prophet himself), to make these marriages recognizable in the eyes of Islam. This, however, did not happen. All the existing marriages were recognized to be valid and no change of any status of the married couple was effected. In fact, we do not even find a single instance where the Prophet (pbuh) invalidated any existing marriage between a person, who accepted Islam and his/her existing spouse, even though the spouse still ascribed to the polytheistic creed. Ibn Sa`d in his compilation of Muslim history "Al-Tabaqaat al-Kubraa", in the life sketch of Zainab (ra) - the daughter of the Prophet (pbuh) - writes: When Abu al-`aas ibn al-Rabiy` returned from Syria, his wife Zainab (the daughter of the Prophet) had accepted faith and had migrated to Medinah with her father. Later on, he (i.e. her husband) also accepted faith. They were not separated (i.e. there marriage was not invalidated during this time). Qatadah reports that Zainab, the daughter of the Prophet (pbuh) was married to Abu al-`aas ibn al-Rabiy`. She migrated to Medinah with the Prophet of God. Subsequently, her husband accepted faith and migrated to the Prophet of God. At that time, the Prophet (pbuh) gave Zainab back to her husband... According to Ibn Abbas (ra) the Prophet (pbuh) returned his daughter Zainab to Abu al`aas - her husband - after two years of separation, under the first contract of marriage between them (i.e. without effecting a new marriage contract between them). It is quite clear that had existing marriages been automatically invalidated through the acceptance of Islam of any one or the other of the spouses, each of the companions' marriages would have been invalidated and subsequently a new contract would have been effected. [/quote] 2.) hey if you dont look like a man then dont worry!:) you know there are some girls who would cut their hair real short, and wear guy clothes and you cant tell if they are a guy or girl...or there is the guy who gets his hair really long and wears pink shirts, or a girly dress :D thats what I think it means. We should be happy with what God made us whether its a girl or its a boy and not try to be something we are not. 3.) I love animals but honestly I cannot pet an animal and then not go wash my hands. Cleanliness is half the faith so i think thats a big part of it. And another thing animals are meant to be wild, not to be kept as 'pets' animals are different and we humans are diff, it has gone to the extreme to try to make an animal human, somthing they are not. They deserve their own way of life/living. By the way the money you give to buy pets they just use that money to capture more animals and sell them. And Allah(swt) knows best your sister |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| muahmed |
| 06/27/03 at 19:10:58 |
| [slm] ;-) I just wanted to point out somethings that were not made clear in Zainab's (ra) biography. When Zainab was married to a non Muslim, the ruling prohibiting Muslim women to marry disbelievers had not yet been revealed. As soon as the ruling was revealed, Zainab (ra) seperated herself from her husband. As long as her husband remained a disbeliever she did not stay with him or meet with him as a couple. Maybe the reason the Prophet (saws) did not ask her to divorce him was that he was hopeful her husband would convert to Islam; her husband was known for being just and truthful even though he was a disbeliever.. Only when he converted to Islam did Zainab(ra) go back to him as his wife. The official ruling on a non-Muslim woman converting to Islam is that she should seperate from her husband until he accepts Islam. I have never heard the opinion of scholars that she MUST divorce her husband straight away. However to continue to have marital relations with him is unlawful. (This is atleast the position of Hanafi ulema and although I am sure it is the general position, I will not claim so as I have not asked ulema of other madhabs.) I am not passing any judgements here or saying what should be done. Just wanted to inform what I knew about this issue. |
| 06/27/03 at 19:17:17 |
| muahmed |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| se7en |
| 06/27/03 at 23:13:06 |
| as salaamu alaykum wa rahmatullah, Respectfully, br. Muhammad, this is not the opinion of some scholars. That is why I think it is best for sis Cara to speak with an imam or scholar in here area, who can best assess her situation and give a ruling based on their expertise. w'Allahu a'lam. wasalaamu alaykum :-) |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| Yousef |
| 06/28/03 at 00:25:41 |
| ??? |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| bhaloo |
| 06/28/03 at 00:56:16 |
| [slm] Some of the things said in this thread I don't like how they are being presented. Yes things should be said with hikmah, but that doesn't mean to be deceitful. [quote author=se7en link=board=madrasa;num=1056646252;start=0#8 date=06/27/03 at 23:13:06]Respectfully, br. Muhammad, this is not the opinion of some scholars. [/quote] Se7en, who holds such an opinion and what is his proof? I've never heard of such an opinion. Please provide detailed evidence for this, insha'Allah. Here was a nice question and answer session on this very topic: Question: I know that Muslim women are not allowed in Islam to marry non-Muslim men; there is a sister on a converts list who recently became Muslim and who was asking what to do regarding her non-Muslim husband who accepted her conversion without any problems and who also lets her educate the children the Islamic way. However, when she asked for an advice, most of us told her that the husband has to take shahada or she should not remained married to him otherwise. Unfortunately, some other people don't believe so and advised her the opposite way, that she just should remain with the husband and so on,.... I would like you to send me concrete cases at the time of the Prophet (SAW) where Muslim women (sahabyate) would leave their non-Muslim husbands if those decided not to convert. I think those cases would be the only proof to convince the people of that list that Muslim women are not allowed to marry or remain married to non-Muslims men even though they are not against the woman's conversion. Answer: Praise be to Allaah. What you have said in your question about it being haraam for a Muslim woman to marry a kaafir man is correct, and there is no doubt concerning that. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “And give not (your daughters) in marriage to Al-Mushrikoon till they believe” [al-Baqarah 2:221] Al-Qurtubi said: “ ‘And give not (your daughters) in marriage’ means, do not give Muslim women in marriage to Mushrik men. The ummah is agreed that a Mushrik should not marry a Muslim woman because this is like putting Islam in an inferior position. (Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 3/72). Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “They are not lawful (wives) for the disbelievers nor are the disbelievers lawful (husbands) for them” [al-Mumtahanah 60:10] Al-Bukhaari (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Chapter: when a mushrik or Christian woman who is married to a dhimmi (non-Muslim living under Muslim rule) or a harbi (non-Muslim belonging to a people who are hostile towards Islam) becomes Muslim. ‘Abd al-Waarith said, narrating from Khaalid from ‘Ikrimah from Ibn ‘Abbaas: if a Christian woman becomes Muslim shortly before her husband, she is forbidden for him… Mujaahid said: if he becomes Muslim during the ‘iddah [waiting period following divorce], then he may (re)marry her. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “They are not lawful (wives) for the disbelievers nor are the disbelievers lawful (husbands) for them” [al-Mumtahanah 60:10]. Al-Hasan and Qutaadah said concerning two Magians who became Muslim that their marriage was still valid. If one of them had become Muslim and the other had refused, the woman would have been divorced and he would no longer have any rights over her. (Saheeh al-Bukhaari. See al-Fath, 9/421). Examples of such women include: Zaynab, the daughter of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). She was married to Abu’l-‘Aas ibn al-Rabee’ during the Jaahiliyyah, but when she became Muslim, their marriage was annulled, and she went and stayed with her father (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). When her husband became Muslim, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) sent her back to him. (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1143; Abu Dawood, 2240; Ibn Maajah, 2009; classed as saheeh by Imaam Ahmad, 1789. Al-Tirmidhi said, there is nothing wrong with its isnaad). The correct view is that the husband can go back to her with no need to renew the marriage contract. If the woman is still in her ‘iddah, he has more right (than anyone else) to marry her. If her ‘iddah has ended, she is free to choose whether to go back to him or not. Al-Tirmidhi said: On the basis of this hadeeth, the scholars said that if a woman becomes Muslim before her husband, then her husband becomes Muslim whilst she is still in her ‘iddah, then the husband has more right to her whilst she is still in her ‘iddah. This is the view of Maalik ibn Anas, al-Oozaa’i, al-Shaafa’i, Ahmad and Ishaaq. (Sunan al-Tirmidhi, Hadeeth 1142). Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr said: There is no dispute among the scholars concerning the fact that if a kaafir woman becomes Muslim then her ‘iddah ends, her husband has no rights concerning her if he has not become Muslim during her ‘iddah. (Al-Tamheed, 12/23). Ibn al-Qayyim said: But what the ruling of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) indicates is that the marriage comes to a halt. If he becomes Muslim before the end of her ‘iddah, then she is (still) his wife, but if her ‘iddah ends, then she may marry whomever she wants. If she likes, she can wait for him, and if he becomes Muslim she is his wife and there is no need to renew the marriage contract. (Zaad al-Ma’aad, 5/137, 138) Al-Qurtubi said: Talhah ibn ‘Ubayd-Allaah was married to Arwaa bint Rabee’ah ibn al-Haarith ibn ‘Abd al-Muttalib. They were separated by Islam, then in Islam Khaalid ibn Sa’eed ibn al-‘Aas married her. She was one of the [Muslim] wives of the kuffaar who fled to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) kept her in Madinah and married her to Khaalid. (Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 18/65, 66) It was reported that Anas said: Abu Talhah married Umm Sulaym and the mahr between them was Islam. Umm Sulaym became Muslim before Abu Talhah. He proposed marriage to her and she said, “I have become Muslim. If you become Muslim I will marry you.” So he became Muslim and that was the mahr between them. (Narrated by al-Nasaa’i, 3340) The daughter of al-Waleed ibn al-Magheerah, the wife of Safwaan ibn Umayyah, became Muslim before him, and the marriage was annulled. Then he became Muslim later on, and she went back to him. It was narrated by Maalik in al-Muwatta’, 1132. Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr said: I do not know of any unbroken saheeh isnaad for this hadeeth, but it is famous and well known to the scholars of seerah, Ibn Shihaab, the leader of the scholars of seerah, and al-Shu’bi. The fame of this hadeeth is stronger than its isnaad in sha Allaah. (al-Tamheed, 12/19) Umm Hakeem bint al-Haarith ibn Hishaam, the wife of ‘Ikrimah ibn Abi Jahl. Her marriage was annulled, then he became Muslim during her ‘iddah, so she went back to her husband. (Narrated by Ibn Abi Shaybah in al-Musannaf, 4/107) And Allaah knows best. |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| se7en |
| 06/28/03 at 01:50:24 |
| as salaamu alaykum wa rahmatullah, I am just a bit alarmed that we here are making fiqhi rulings when we are not qualified to make them. I really strongly encourage those of you who feel strongly about this to speak with your imam or someone knowledgeable in your area on this issue.. I think it will give you a lot of perspective, as it did for me. I even had the opportunity to speak to one of my all time favorite scholars at a recent conference on this very issue [hint: his name on the board was Madani :)], and I learned a lot from what he had to say. Cara, once again (for the millionth time hehe :)) I urge you to speak with an imam or scholar in your area. :) wasalaamu alaykum, se7en |
| 06/28/03 at 02:09:37 |
| se7en |
| Re: OH NO !!! More Caraj questions |
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| jannah |
| 06/28/03 at 02:30:30 |
| [slm] Cara i hope those posts helped answered your questions a bit. It's definitely a good idea to find a nice understanding imam somewhere that you can talk to inshaAllah. I'm going to close this thread before it becomes a brawl inshaAllah ;) |
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