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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| 3 buried in Muslim tradition |
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| ahmer |
| 08/04/03 at 17:10:21 |
| Subhan'Allah this was totally shocking for me when i read this in the cair-net email today. May Allah grant them the highest station in jannah..ameen This is again a reminder from ALlah swt that death can come anytime and anywhere! Feel really bad for the kid! 3 buried in Muslim tradition Posted on Sat, Aug. 02, 2003 3 buried in Muslim tradition Relatives want to raise 18-month-old girl ROBERT F. MOORE & CRISTINA BREEN Staff Writers James English didn't agree with his son's decision to convert to Islam 10 years ago, but consented Friday to have him buried as he lived -- a Muslim. "As Christians, we didn't approve of it," he said. "But our love for our son was sufficient to accept his decision." Fred and Amel English and their 3-year-old daughter, Nadia, were killed Tuesday when a tree fell on their car in a Matthews parking lot. On Friday they were cleansed, wrapped in white cloth and buried in Gastonia -- at a cemetery where religious leaders say most area Muslims are buried. The burial -- janazah in Arabic -- came after negotiations between the victims' relatives in Charlotte and Algeria and leaders of the local Muslim community. Still, a critical issue remains: Who will raise Miriam, the 18-month-old daughter who survived the accident? Her Muslim relatives in Algeria, or her Christian grandparents in Charlotte? Fred and Amel English, both 33, didn't have a will. Mujahid Idlibi, spokesman for the Islamic Center of Charlotte, said he reached Amel English's Algerian relatives by phone early Friday and broke the news of her death. They consented to the Muslim burial. "They also indicated they want custody of Miriam," Idlibi said. Told of their intentions at his east Charlotte home Friday, the paternal grandfather James English said: "Not gonna happen. It's our intention to raise Miriam." Legal experts say issues such as burial and custody are best handled ahead of time by having a will. At religious leaders' urging, dozens filled out wills Friday at the Islamic Center of Charlotte. Religious leaders say a will is the only way to make sure one's wishes -- no matter the faith -- are carried out after death. Otherwise, a judge may decide custody and other legal issues. The maternal family's citizenship would not be a legal obstacle to getting custody of Miriam, said Charlotte attorney Bill Diehl, who handles divorce and custody cases. They can still file a claim for custody. "Citizenship has nothing to do with it," he said. "The issqe is what's best for the child." Conversion A former board member of the Islamic Center of Charlotte, Fred English was known to the Muslim community as Fareed.A native of Cheraw, S.C., he converted to Islam about the same time he was studying chemistry at UNC Charlotte. Friends and relatives say he was eager to have a family. His search for a wife led him to Algeria. He married Amel about four years ago in a Muslim ceremony in the northern African country. The couple moved in with James and Karen English and lived there about eight months before buying their own home in east Charlotte. As he worked Friday on plans for a private memorial service, James English reflected on his son, daughter-in-law and granddaughter. Three-year-old Nadia, he said, called him "paw-paw." Her grandmother, she called "maw-maw." "Nadia was shy, but only for about 15 minutes," he said. "After that, she was the equal of her younger sister. Miriam has only two speeds -- stop and wide-open." Miriam is at Carolinas Medical Center in fair condition. She underwent surgery on her fractured leg, which relatives say is broken in two places and crushed. She is not expected to have long-term problems walking. Relatives say she'll be in the hospital for at least another week. James English said he hasn't thought about how he'll one day explain the tragedy to Miriam, who he says will be raised in a Christian home. "That will be dealt with in due time," he said. New customs Amel English, who is survived by at least a brother and elderly father, found American customs odd, her father-in-law said. Her American-born in-laws found trips with her to the grocery store and even to the park amusing. James English remembered Amel going to a lake in east Charlotte and watching geese. She started tossing bread to the birds, he recalled. " `You'd look wonderful in gravy,' " he recalled her saying to a goose. "She was used to buying live chickens, not going to the Food Lion and buying them frozen." Charlotte resident Antonia Ramahi went to high school with Fred English and said she became quick friends with Amel when she arrived from Algeria. Ramahi said Amel English had been a computer engineer in Algeria and hoped to go back to work once her children were in school. "She told you what she thought, and she was funny without trying to be," Ramahi said. "You could tell her your problems, and she always had great insight." What James English remembers most about his son and daughter-in-law is not how they died -- in a chance accident near Home Depot -- but their love for their daughters. "She was a good mother and he was a good father," he said. "And I'm proud of that." Burial process Late Friday afternoon, a few dozen men and women gathered at the Islamic Society of Gastonia to begin the process of burying Fred, Amel and Nadia English.Some were close friends of the family; others simply knew them as friendly faces who prayed beside them on Fridays at the Islamic Center of Charlotte on Progress Lane. Once they arrived in Gastonia, the three bodies were placed in a small building in front of the mosque. According to Islamic custom, about 10 women went into the building to carefully bathe the bodies of Amel and Nadia, and cover them in a plain white cotton cloth. About an hour later, a group of about a dozen men went into the building to bathe and shroud Fred English's body. Often it's the deceased's closest family members who bathe and shroud the body, but on Friday friends of the Englishes performed the duty. They wore gloves and took care to be gentle. Traditionally the dead are believed to retain some hearing and feeling for a time, so bathers try to avoid any movements that would bring the dead discomfort, such as scrubbing wounds. Several hundred mourners then gathered in five neat rows on the mosque's lawn and faced northeast, in the direction of Mecca. After about five minutes of prayers, they brought the shrouded bodies out on plain wooden boards and held them high in the air as they walked to the cemetery about 75 yards away. The women stayed about 20 yards behind, while the men took the bodies to the graves and placed them in separate six-foot-deep holes. They placed boards on top of the bodies, then tossed dirt into the graves with shovels. "He became a Muslim, and now he's being buried with Muslims," said Mohammad Baghdadi, a friend of Fred English. "I'm so happy for him." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WANT TO HELP? Donations can be mailed to: American Community Bank c/o English family P.O. Box 1470 Indian Trail, NC 28079 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- STAFF WRITER JACKIE MAH CONTRIBUTED. |
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