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Are we dying? really?

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Are we dying? really?
Maliha
09/09/03 at 08:28:37
[slm]
Are we dying? Really?

In a world where death is cheaper than a Mc Donald’s happy meal, in a world where even the ones living are permeating the distinct stench of a dying breed, most of us maintain a stubbornly detached relationship with this ever so large impending reality awaiting every single one of us. We watch evening after evening, mesmerized at the carnage that is sold to us wholesale by every major network. We replay most of the coverage, with disdain and empathetic apathy, but surely we don’t believe that any of “those” people could be us. Surely we can not believe that we will face the same fate as the barely one year old dead Iraqi, or the latest tragic tornado victim, we are certainly safe from the Wild west’s wild fires, and have never had the luxury of hearing gunshots ring through our neighborhoods. So are we really going to die? I mean really?

[i] “I walked in apprehensive..not knowing what to expect. I had never met this man, who is supposed to be our relative. My husband gave me a reassuring look, come on. I stepped gingerly into the room, the stench of which was no different from the rest of the building. An Asian man lay on the first bed, I looked at him, nodded relieved somewhat it wasn’t “him”. A little curtain was drawn between the two beds. In the corner of this darkened room, oozing with despair, lay a broken man. His whole left side was paralyzed as was his complete lower side.
He looked at us blankly.
“he resembles my father” I thought with a pang. My husband introduced us. He nodded at the mention of my mother’s name. He laboriously made conversation with my husband, “you are like my children” he said it in arabic, just like my father would. I looked at him choked with tears. What do you say to a dying man? What hope could I give him, when my fate has been sealed too. Yet death seemed so much further away from me. He lay unable to move, six weeks maybe, six months at the most. Brain tumor, a malignant aggressive case. A stroke resulting from a biopsy gone wrong... living in an age when so called healers accelerate the dying process. He chokes a lot too, but doesn’t bother to call the nurses. Too few and overworked, they can’t keep cutting their routine for the constant buzzing of patients..you understand right?
I wanted to say so much. I wanted to reach over and wipe the silent tear trickling down his face. Don’t weep, Allah is cleansing you, don’t you understand? He wants you purified of the burdens of this world. I wanted to tell him how fervently I had been praying for him since I heard, surely He listens to the duah of a believer for another one right? I wanted to gently ease the pain etched through every line in his face.
I stood silently. My husband told him he needed to rest. We’ll be back. Tomorrow. Inshaallah. He continued to give us greetings of peace till we stepped out the room. I could almost touch the weight of death settling back in. [/i]

How can someone walk into the hospital complaining of minor headaches and dizziness, and by the evening be immobile, with a death sentence proclaimed upon his fast dying body? That could be me. I know. Theoretically at least. My mind flitted with the constant array of ayahs reminding us of death. Don’t you see how the earth turns from the depth of green to a yellowing seething death of winter *every* season? Don’t you reflect on the sun as it dies ever so subtly *every* day? Generations have gone before you, and more are dying as we speak? Don’t you know you are dying too?

I know...

I remembered the sermon on Friday, the Khatib talked about the importance of having a mission statement in life. A vision and a mission statement. For Muslims, he reminded us, our vision is on the Hereafter. This life is nothing but a passageway. We are travelers. The companions of our beloved Prophet (SAW) went through “extreme” measures to remember this. Some dug graves right outside their houses. The minute they walked out, they remembered their destination. Another one dug a grave right by his bedside, yes a more apt reminder for every “waking” moment we have. He said how corporations realize the importance of mission statements and they have them plastered all around the company, devising logos, memos, and meetings constantly to remember and regurgitate their fundamental purpose of existence. In most Muslim households copies of the Holy Quran are collecting dust, and any mention of the dreaded “death” word, is likely to elicit rebuke. “Why are you so morbid?”

So we pray a little, we eat a lot, work even more, and become a little more forgetful that we are dying by the measure of each breath we take.
[i]
What are your thoughts? I wanted to ask him. Are you ready to face Allah? Am I ready myself? If I were to die *right* at this very moment, what would I say? How much of my good deeds can I proudly carry with me? He Who surely knows all the secrets within my hearts of hearts, can surely detect much of the superficialities sugar coating even my “best” of deeds. He Who can detect the slightest motion of an atom’s worth, can surely witness the vast spiritual desert that is my soul.
Do you have enough provisions? I wanted to ask him. Yet I looked down at my dying strands of regret, the truest emblem of all my dead years and was too ashamed to look up.
We’ll be back. Tomorrow. Inshaallah. We walked out.[/i]

I wondered uneasily why all of a dramatic sudden, tomorrow didn’t seem so near anymore.

sis,
Nur al Layl  :(
[wlm]

PS: please make duah for my uncle, who has been diagnosed with a brain tumor. May Allah ease our suffering (amin)
Re: Are we dying? really?
BroHanif
09/09/03 at 13:08:47
Salaams,

May Allah make it easy on your family and all those who are in ill health.

[quote]He said how corporations realize the importance of mission statements and they have them plastered all around the company, devising logos, memos, and meetings constantly to remember and regurgitate their fundamental purpose of existence. In most Muslim households copies of the Holy Quran are collecting dust, and any mention of the dreaded “death” word, is likely to elicit rebuke. “Why are you so morbid?” [/quote]
Excellant Advice..

Salaams

Hanif
NS
Re: Are we dying? really?
sofia
09/09/03 at 13:22:47
[slm]

May Allah cleanse him of his sins, ease his pain and accept him into Jannat-al-Firdaus, unquestioned.  And all of us, too, iA -- we're all walking towards our graves.

Beautifully written, sis, jazaaki Allahu khayr for the reminder.

[i]Gotta work on my mission statement now[/i]
09/09/03 at 13:23:28
sofia
Re: Are we dying? really?
little._.sister
09/10/03 at 20:37:59
[slm]
thank you sister for that wonderful writing.... I think we all need to be reminded of things like this often....
may Allah make things easier for your uncle, and give what is best for him
09/10/03 at 20:43:16
little._.sister
Re: Are we dying? really?
bhaloo
09/11/03 at 01:05:00
[slm]

May Allah (SWT) help your uncle and you and your family in this difficult time.  AMEEN.  Please let us know if there is anything else you or your family need.
Re: Are we dying? really?
Maliha
11/07/03 at 08:32:05
[slm]
Alhamdullillah, Allah took his soul last night...the brain tumor was very aggressive..it was really hard to see him suffer even in the minutest breath he took.

My husband held his hand the whole time, saying Laillaha illah Allah...Subhana Allah..two months ago this man was walking and talking...had plans for Ramadhan to travel etc...and now he is gone. I had never met him before he got sick..and now I feel like a little part of me went with him... :(

May Allah bless his soul with Rahma, Maghfirah and finally Jannah to be his abode (Amin). Please make duah for him....

sigh...
[wlm]
Re: Are we dying? really?
Halima
11/07/03 at 09:02:06
Sis Nur_al_Layl,

Ina Lillah Waina Lillah Rajiooun!  May Allah Subhana Wataallah rest his soul in Jannatul Firdowsa Biidhnillah.  May Allah give you and the family Sabr and peace. Ameen.

Halima
Re: Are we dying? really?
timbuktu
11/07/03 at 09:35:54
[slm] sister

what is there to say except: "inna lillahi wa inna ilehi raji`oon"

that is where we all have to go, & we should go happily.
Re: Are we dying? really?
BroHanif
11/07/03 at 18:48:58
Salaams,

May Allah make it easy on you and your family. From Allah we are and to Allah we will return.

Salaams

Hanif
Re: Are we dying? really?
paula
11/09/03 at 20:53:46
[slm]
Oh Sister Nur_al_Layl  .....

La illaha il' Allah, Muhammad ar Rasool Allah….. this makes the third such announcement I came upon today. (I almost missed this one.)

Jazak Allahu Khairan…What a beautiful contemplation to the reminder offered here…… Subhan Allah.

Ina Lilahi wa ina ilaihi rajioon…. Prayers for the deceased & prayers for you & your family Sister. May Allah (swt) offer you all the best of Sabr & keep you all in the best of health in Iman…… Insha Allah….. Ameen

What a dose of reminder, What an issue to supplicate on this evening. May Allah (swt) assist us all through the remainder of this Ramadan……Insha’ Allah…. Ameen

[wlm]
11/09/03 at 21:01:10
paula


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