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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| faisalsb |
| 03/20/04 at 13:48:08 |
| Divorced from lap of luxury Dubai |By Bassam Za'za', Staff Reporter | 20-03-2004 Print friendly format | Email to Friend A woman of expensive tastes has divorced her husband as he was not able to support her in the fancy lifestyle she desired. The Iranian woman, apparently brought up in a wealthy family, visited the Dubai Department of Justice last week to file for divorce. Officials there heard that she was claiming divorce as her husband, an Iranian technician, wasn't able to fund her shopping sprees. The woman said she was used to wearing clothes and accessories from likes of Gucci, Christian Dior, Chanel and Versace. And, as her husband was not able to afford her uptown life, she wanted to leave him. Marriage counsellors were told the 30-year-old husband earned Dh5,000 monthly. The wife was granted the divorce after arrangements to resolve the dispute failed. http://www.gulfnews.com/Articles/news.asp?ArticleID=114954 |
| 03/20/04 at 13:48:50 |
| faisalsb |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| Kathy |
| 03/21/04 at 09:41:20 |
| I think he is lucky to be finally rid of her! may Allah swt give him someone better! |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| mujaahid4ever |
| 03/21/04 at 14:43:50 |
| [slm] I pity any brother who ends up with a materialistic wife! You want a wife who will be a good mother to your children, honest, loving someone you enjoy being with, who will respect you for who you are, not someone who wants to marry you simply because you can buy her the latest perfumes and suits which have been designed by homosexuals! So this brother should be happy and relieved that he no longer has to be with such a materialistic woman, alhumdulillah! maasalaam m4e |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| Caraj |
| 03/21/04 at 23:49:08 |
| I second Kathy's response Had he been my son I would of been furious Had she been my daughter I'd of put her across my knee |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| jaihoon |
| 03/22/04 at 06:16:43 |
| [slm] I think she was right in asking for her luxury rights. Allahu A'lam |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| Kathy |
| 03/22/04 at 08:41:01 |
| What are the Rights of Luxury? |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| Barr |
| 03/22/04 at 12:25:11 |
| [slm] This reminds me on the issue of nafakah that I learnt years ago, while I was little, on Munakahat (Shafi'ie Fiqh). Pls correct me if I'm wrong. Once married, giving nafakah to one's wife depends on the nafakah that she is used to, given by her father (ie. her standards of living while single and married is maintained). Therefore, if she is used to silk, nafakah for clothing would have to be of that quality, not lower. Of course, if the wife is alright with a lower standard of living, then, there's no issue of not giving her the expected nafakah. Allahua'lam :) |
| 03/22/04 at 17:59:37 |
| Barr |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| tahirah |
| 03/22/04 at 15:49:08 |
| hmmm, didn't she know how much he made BEFORE she married him? |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| Kathy |
| 03/23/04 at 08:33:11 |
| [slm] hmmm.... just a rambling thought I grew up 'wearing silk'. I married a man who said he would provide 'the silk' It did not happen. He has given me 'cotton' I am thinking so I will divorce him for not providing me with 'silk.' But what will I say to Allah swt when he asks me why I would rather have 'silk' than the handsome good brother, that he gave me as a husband? PS.... as you get older you find that 'cotton' is so much better than 'silk!' |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| Fozia |
| 03/23/04 at 16:43:54 |
| [slm] Remembered something whilst reading this. Along the lines of what Sr. Barr has said, if a woman is used to being attended by servants doesn't know her dyson from her aga she's entitled to be kept in the way she has been accustomed. However as the other sister mentioned didn't she or her folks or whoever bother asking whether the hapless bro could maintain the Sr.... and crikey Versace?!?! she could make her own versace dresses, rip up a perfectly good dress and put it back together again with safety pins...voila cut price Versace. Wassalaam |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| timbuktu |
| 03/23/04 at 18:21:37 |
| [slm] very interesting! Fortunately my wife does not get on the net, or this may give her ideas :) seriously though, what if the husband was able to provide "nafaqah" as per the lady being "accustomed to", and then his real income dropped, and he wasn't able to any more? |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| Trustworthy |
| 03/24/04 at 01:29:16 |
| [slm] Ya Rubbi. All we ask for is a good Muslim husband who will be the Imam of our home and provide food, shelter, clothing, and guidance with our religion. Once he's a good Muslim, everything else should fall into place. Spoils of this dunya is nothing compared to the spoils of Jannah. She's a dumb*** if this is a true story. May Allah guide her and the husband that had to put up with her. Good riddance!!! Ma-asalama.... |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| faisalsb |
| 03/24/04 at 03:03:18 |
| [wlm] [quote]Once married, giving nafakah to one's wife depends on the nafakah that she is used to, given by her father (ie. her standards of living while single and married is maintained). Therefore, if she is used to silk, nafakah for clothing would have to be of that quality, not lower. Of course, if the wife is alright with a lower standard of living, then, there's no issue of not giving her the expected nafakah. [/quote] Well that's an interesting point of view, I'll appreciate if the sister can through some more light on it according to Quran and Sunnah. Because as per my knowledge Holy Prophet [saw] did have atleast two wives who belonged to a rich families and did have luxurious life style before marrying to Holy Prophet [saw]. First one was offcourse Hazrat Khadija (RAU) and second one was daughter of Abu Suffian (RAU) (I forgot her name), as we know Abu Suffian (RAU) was one of the richest and most influential tribal leader of Makka. We also know life of those rich ladies after marrying Holy Prophet [saw], that some times no food was cooked in houses of Holy Prophet [saw] even for continous two months. And there was no continous three days when the fire was lit to cook food in Holy Prophet's [saw] houses. So that was the nafakah what those rich ladies got from Holy Prophet [saw] after getting married. And when wives of Holy Prophet [saw] did demand their Nafakah, Holy Prophet [saw] disliked it and remained away from them for one month. And latter after the Quranic verses were revealed regarding the matter, wives of Holy Prophet [saw] were given choice either to choose Holy Prophet [saw] and life of hereafter or choose money and this temporary world. In light of upper mentioned facts the viewpoint of Sister Barr is really interesting but I'll refrain myself from commenting more unless she enlighten us with her detailed arguments regarding the subject. |
| 03/24/04 at 03:10:08 |
| faisalsb |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| jannah |
| 03/24/04 at 04:07:47 |
| wlm, brother faisal this concept is one that is detailed by scholars in some writings on the fiqh of marriage... i've read it before as well.. if ur interested u can do some research on it. as for the prophet [saw], everything he or the mothers of the believers did is not necessarily law or enjoined upon us. nor is everything they didn't do. so that isn't necessarily the lithmus test to what is islamic in fiqh or not. for example, the prophet (s) married 11 times, yet 4 is the limit by shari'ah. the wives of the prophet were not allowed to marry after the prophet (s), yet women are allowed by shari'ah to marry after they become widows. |
| Re: Is it what Sisters look in a husband? |
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| a_Silver_Rose |
| 03/25/04 at 01:56:13 |
| [slm] wa rahmatullahi wa barakatahu I have also heard what sister Barr mentioned. comeon people this is from the media, and we all know that media does not always give the full details and does not always tell the truth. Lets save ourself from doing haram and backbiting about this woman. Noone really knows what is in a person's heart and what is really happening in a persons home. Only Allah (swt) knows. who knows? maybe her husband promised her all this luxury and then failed to fulfill his promise...maybe she was tricked into thinking he was a rich man. maybe there was another reason for divorce which she is too embarrassed to tell. Isnt there a hadith about making 70 excuses for a Muslim. Maybe she is suffering more than him because of this article. well atleast her sins are being washed away... We really dont know anything about this family. "The wife was granted the divorce after arrangements to resolve the dispute failed. " Looks like they tried to resolve it but didnt work so maybe its for the better. and Allah (swt) knows best. |
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