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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| baby time. |
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| princess |
| 04/26/04 at 20:27:05 |
| as'salaamualaikum :) before anyone gets the wrong idea, there's no need to congratulate me or anything. :) i just wanna know of books out there, about raising kids, how to be a mother, pregnancy awareness type things. i would like to have a heads up on these things, beforehand, so i'm not overwhelmed when the time comes, inshAllah. :) i'm don't want to be limited to 'islamic' books. any and all books i'm open to. :) i would prefer books that you guys have read, or know someone who has read which would be beneficial, inshAllah. :) thanks. :) |
| 04/26/04 at 20:29:15 |
| princess |
| Re: baby time. |
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| Ayla_A |
| 04/26/04 at 20:46:16 |
| [slm] Here is a really wonderful book [url=http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0761121323/qid=1083029882/sr=8-1/ref=pd_ka_1/002-6109032-5101619?v=glance&s=books&n=507846]What to expect when you are expecting[/url] It covers everything emotionally and physically that you will go through during pregnancy. They have the same books for baby's first year etc :) [wlm] :-)Ayla_A |
| Re: baby time. |
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| M.F. |
| 04/27/04 at 06:27:19 |
| Assalamu alaikum Ma sha Allah it's great that you're preparing in advance. You will probably need to reread it all when the time comes however. But preparing now will give you a chance to decide what you want to follow. You'll find that even in parenting, there's great controversy. I highly recommend the Dr. Sears books. The ones I have are The Baby Book and How to Raise a Successful Child, but there's a lot of other books that I haven't been able to get cause I'm way over here in Morocco. Dr. Sears promotes what's called: Attachment Parenting. What I've found is that basically you go along with your instincts. He recommends a lot of things that are done in most traditional cultures around the world, including carrying your baby a lot (wearing him), breastfeeding on cue on not on a schedule, having the baby sleep in bed with you and a few other things like really being in tune with your child and responding to their cues. I wasn't entirely sure about having the baby sleep next to me, but when the time came it was just so much easier that I just did it. I've read other types of parenting books but the result has usually been a huge sense of failure and guilt when my baby didn't start sleeping on his own and through the night at 3 months or when he was still nursing at nigh (now) at one year. Most books recommend that you let the baby "fuss a little" which means cry his eyes out, which can take hours and goes against all human instincts... What I recommend as far as sleep is to start out right from the very beginning. Elizabeth Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solution" is really good. I'm mentioning all this sleep thing cause it'll be your highest priority after you have the baby, and it's what "sells" most. Most "solutions" always involve some crying, and I just wasn't able to do that, so the Pantley book was a great relief for me. Any book that suggests a "flexible schedule" is anti-Attachment parenting :) You'll find that your baby will fall into a schedule eventually, but books like that just stress you out and make you feel like a failure because it's almost impossible to get into a schedule from the very beginning especially one revolving around the clock! :) hmm that's probably a little more than you'd bargained for, but I hope it helps insha Allah :) :-) |
| Re: baby time. |
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| Kathy |
| 04/27/04 at 16:26:29 |
| [slm] My favorite was: The Portable Pediatrician: A Practicing Pediatrician's Guide to Your Child's Growth, Development, Health and Behavior, from Birth to Age Five by Laura W. Nathanson and Caring for Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age 5 by American Academy Of Pediatrics My biggest regret was not learning about the Islamic ways and reading about what was happening to my baby as he grew inside me. |
| Re: baby time. |
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| Barr |
| 04/28/04 at 20:25:00 |
| [slm] What do you think of attachment parenting vs anti-attachment parenting? I read many benefits of attachment parenting, for example, it helps shape the baby's personality positively and make them feel safe and secure (eg. having a family bed instead of baby sleeping alone). Its somewhat like a fitrah-centric parenting, if I can coin the term. But I see, many positives from the other school of thought too. Some children whom I know do not display negative traits such as low confidence, low security etc as shown in researches that encourages attachment parenting. Besides, it also helps parents to discipline their children and it makes things easier with schedules etc. I'm sure many parents, probably combine both methods... but what do you think abt them, and in which circumstances would you think applying either/ both of them is a better choice? Jazakumullahu khair :) |
| Re: baby time. |
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| Kathy |
| 04/29/04 at 07:27:10 |
| [quote]attachment parenting vs anti-attachment parenting[/quote] New terminology for us ole' folk.... What does this mean? |
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