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are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut-up  calls

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are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut-up  calls
timbuktu
05/17/04 at 02:09:12
[slm] all

Jannah started a thread sometime back where it said people were not expressing themselves anymore. Since I did not know many then (still don't), I did not agree, but the old-timers did. Jannah expressed satisfaction that this has improved.

I have looked at the posts and the posters since then, and I still see that while I am looking forward to learning and the thread of my interest just goes dead, or answers are withheld (is it to avoid perceived unpleasantness?), and worse still, posters just stop posting.

While it is true that what we write should be on the board after careful weighing, I am beginning to feel that there is too much reticence, too much holding back, too much self-doubt, and of course some posts do come out as trying to shut someone else up.

Please everyone:

1. you have so much to tell us, do that,
2. and please do not disapprove of others
3. and if someone's post come out as if disapproving, please do not take offence. There are others who want to hear from you.

Now this isn't my job, and if the moderators tell me I have overstepped the line and it was their right to make such an observation, they would be right. But despite my self-doubt, I have gone and said it, haven't I.

Thanks for lending me an ear.
05/17/04 at 03:01:23
timbuktu
Re: are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut
Muna
05/17/04 at 18:10:26
Assalaamu-alaikum Everyone

I agree with some parts of your comment.  I love this board, but sometimes I feel like many people do hold back and thats mostly due to; I always thought it to be modesty.  I mean I remember there was one topic about masterbation that was brought up and two people replied to that topic and addressed that for the moral standards of this board that topic should be discussed elsewhere.  From what I gathered, the board is here to teach things about Islam, answer questions that nessarily do not need a scholar, offer support, discuss worldly ongoings, and bring the ummah closer together.  At the same time, the board has to have some sense of control of things that should or should not be discussed, because this enviroment is mixed with both sexes conversating and therefore requires standards to be placed to make it a halal environment.  I understand that may make a few people upset because there topic was booted and they may not feel compelled to write another topic, but would you rather have a tainted environment on this board, openly discussing topics that arent right?  I know the moderators are trying there best to regulate the conversations and to provide assistance or redirection  those they feel arent starting the best converations.  However, I do feel that people like to view topics and barely like responding this entire thread should rather focus on why view COME ON PEOPLE RESPOND :)

ma'salaama Muna
         
Re: are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut
Trustworthy
05/18/04 at 01:45:42
[slm]...

Hehehehe....

I'm not holding.  You holding back? *looks right then left*

No.  Really.  I haven't been able to respond lately because I'm busy now a days, but I see what you mean.  I do see the mass number view to a post and then only 2-3 replies.

Yeah...people...what's up wit dat?

This board is only a fun board whne wer're all talking and not just the regulars.  Despite the many times I've been jumped on of my opinions or what not, I still speak my mind with a WARNING in the beginning now.

Sometimes, I need to be jumped on because sometimes I'm wrong.  I'm not going to find out if I don't say anything, and.....one should not be left dumb struck or whatever that word is when there are many ways to find the answers, aye?

Anyways, all y'all (plural for all of you) have a good evening now.

Ma-assalaamah....ukhti wa akhi fideen....
05/18/04 at 01:47:52
Trustworthy
Re: are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut
theOriginal
05/18/04 at 08:05:52
[slm]

I, too, have been really busy, but I do check up on you guys every now and again :)

Keep up the discussions, they have helped me so much in the past, and in spite of my aloof attitude and irrelevant input, I do think that I have benefitted quite a bit, Alhamdulillah.

I am in Genčve nowadays. The weather is nice right now, but I can feel the heat is going to be unbearable in a month or so.  I pray all of you are doing very well, inshaAllah.

Wasalaam.
Re: are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut
Nadeem
05/18/04 at 08:28:25
[slm]

Salam Brothers and Sisters,

I have been away the last couple of weeks in Malaysia for a friend's wedding.  It is a beautiful country masha'allah with great people, and I would highly recommend visiting there.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand.  As most of you may know, compared to many here, I am still fairly new to the board.  However, even I have noticed what Brother Timbuktu is referring to.  

I think one of the reasons for it may lie in the fact that people are worried about saying the wrong thing.  And as is quite common when someone says something which is slightly incorrect, or even completely wrong, they are firmly jumped on by others.  
This is seen as good in tems of "enjoining the good and forbidding the wrong".  And theres no doubt that if someone is misguided or misinformed they should be advised to their mistake or misinformation. Perhaps its the *manner* in which this "correcting" takes place is what puts some people off posting freely. So be nice, people! :)

Another reason for high viewing numbers but low reply numbers, may be that people are interested in a particular topic but don't really know anything about it.  So they are waiting for others to say something else, and hence they look at the thread.

And of course, theres the good ol' busy-ness factor.  Life is busy. People are busy. We are busy. Everyone is just busy. :)

[wlm]
Re: are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut
UmmWafi
05/24/04 at 01:22:13
[slm] Bro Timbuktu

Have u ever read all the posts in the archives ? Especially the ones that were posted in 2002 and also way before that.  If u have not, then I strongly recommend that you do.  Why ? Just to have a bit of an understanding of the environment, ambience and writing culture back then.  I am not one to linger over "the good old days" because to me every new day brings new hope and new opportunities.  However, since your questions seek to know certain differences, maybe the archives would help.  One word of caution though.  Despite all that have been said and posted, people change. Some beyond recognition.

Wassalam
05/24/04 at 02:22:30
UmmWafi
Re: are we being sensitive, or are we getting shut
your_sister
05/25/04 at 17:31:27
Salam

I have found this site a lot quieter than places like www.soundvison.com  There I would get answers faster. Perhaps here with an older crowd people are more busier and choose to respond more carefully. I would like to see more replies to my posts and inshallah I will try and spend some more time here - because what goes around comes around right?


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