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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Help, my lifes gona end...and start afresh.... |
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| resistance4ever |
| 05/30/04 at 16:50:26 |
| I'm getting married! I got engaged yesterday alhumdulillah to a revert muslimah i've known for a few months. Alhumdulillah both our families are happy with us getting married and none have put up any resistance or shown they are not too pleased with it. Even though her family are very traditional brits, white english non-muslims, they have still accepted me with open arms, even though i'm a bit of a fundy muslim! Whereas a few years back when i wanted to marry a muslimah of another muslim family, but of a different caste, the girls side were prepared to have her killed if she married me. Sad in a way that non-muslims accepted me and were happy for me to marry thier daughter yet a practising muslim family were so hostile. Inshallah our Nikkah is set for the 24 July, with the walimah a week later. But i am getting sooooo nervous about the walimah! what am i supposed to do at the walimah? any brothers got any ideas what the guy (groom) does? all the weddings i've been to, i've just gone to eat as much as possible and didnt really pay attention to what was going on. Do i have to make a silly speech? do i have to pose for loads of photo's???!!!! help me please!!!!!!!!!! [wlm] |
| 05/30/04 at 16:54:53 |
| resistance4ever |
| Re: Help, my lifes gona end...and start afresh.... |
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| theOriginal |
| 05/30/04 at 20:17:19 |
| [slm] MashaAllah...congratulations.... Don't have any advice, but Alhamdulillah, I'm very happy for you :) Wasalaam. |
| Re: Help, my lifes gona end...and start afresh.... |
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| Dar_al_Arqam |
| 05/30/04 at 20:32:30 |
| [slm] Congrats!! May Allah bless you and your new wife! [wlm] |
| Re: Help, my lifes gona end...and start afresh.... |
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| Nadeem |
| 05/30/04 at 20:44:19 |
| [slm] Mubarak bro, on your marriage-to-be! :) Inshallah hope all goes well. Okay on the wedding day what you gotta do is get dressed first, put on your wedding garms. This will vary depending on what country you live in. But word of warning, dont leave getting dressed till last minute, especially if you have to wear stuff you wouldn't normally wear, for example a turban or whatever. Hopefully you have family supporting you? This way they take a lot of the burden of details off your hands. When you get to the wedding venue, if youre from Indian subcontinent, you have to go through these lame-o games. They normally try and nick your shoes and stuff like that (reminds me of that Mr Wendell song by ?. And basically you gotta pay them cash money. Its a market economy out there, and what with globalisation and all, if you want your shoes back, you're gonna have to put down some proper amount. Okay when you get in you gotta do this procession to the front bit of the hall where you're gonna be sitting. This procession is real slow, and you'll feel like a movie star, flashes going off every 3 nanoseconds and some blinding flashlight from the dedicated film crew (i.e. bloke from bangladesh your uncle will have hired for you). Luckily you should have a few of your best mates and some family "youfs" with you for moral support. One of my mate's, his legs started going a bit funny at this point when it suddenly dawned on him that he was actually going to get married :'(, so a good friend by your side, to steady your nerves always helps. Okay once you make it to the front, you sit down, relax up. After few minutes every second person will want to get a pic taken with you. Just massage your cheeks every chance you get to relieve your muscles, because trust me you have to do a LOT of smiling for cameras. ;) Also they may try and feed you stuff. It will most likely be sweet stuff. Keep a bottle of water under your chair, because you'll most likely get thirsty with all that sugary food! If you smoke, or need to take a break or something, get one of your mates to stand around the seating area to cover you leaving. If you havent had actual nikkah done yet, imam, or other authority comes along and does the ceremony bit. This may involve signing legal documents about dowries and things. Have a quick skim through it but dont go overboard. One of my friend's, at his wedding, all eyes were on him and he spent about 8 minutes re-reading the document to make sure it was all correct! Just realised that you said that your wife-to-be's family is white British, so you probably wont have to go through the whole shoe-nicking fiasco. Having said that, does she have any Indian friends who might try and nick your shoes? :) Dont worry about walima. They are more chilled out affairs than actual wedding. Everyones a little more relaxed because girl and boy both already married. The nature of walima will depend very much on your family, because as you know the boy's side does it. I think if you're comfortable, making a speech cant hurt, and it'll be your chance to thank people personally for coming and all that. Plus make some jokes, no rude ones though, the aunties will be doing over-time clucking if you do! :D Above all, have a great day, enjoy yourself and congrats! [] [wlm] |
| Re: Help, my lifes gona end...and start afresh.... |
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| sabri |
| 05/30/04 at 22:24:08 |
| [slm] Mabrook and baarakallahu lakuma wa baaraka 'alaikum wa jama'a bainakuma fee khair. :) [wlm] |
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