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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| I am but human :) |
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| timbuktu |
| 06/14/04 at 11:12:46 |
| [slm] thank you all for the support, and the advice. One brother has very kindly advised me to join the Tablighis. :) Well, I do know some who are very good indeed, and I agree dawah (to oneself first) is what I should be going for. I keep forgetting that Allah (swt) has given me so much more than I deserve. In fact, everything I have is a gift from him, and not “earned” by me. At least from age 20 it should have been clear to me, but I am still human, and give in to Satan’s whispers :) I thought maybe I am not setting my targets high enough, and hence not struggling enough, but on the other hand, I am not being grateful enough and started to wish for more as soon as I got a job. Man is never satisfied with what he has! But deep down, I do hate myself for having had to rely on my wife’s income from time to time. And I am also afraid of what will happen when i cannot see enough even to keep even a low-profile job, and that time seems to be approaching fast. Although, this was also the case 37 years ago, and I should be grateful for all that I have been given during this time. Satan whispers in our ears what will happen tomorrow, and we are but human, we listen to him. aoodhu billahi minash-Shaytanir-rajeem sis Kathy: what indeed is success? Of course, what Allah (swt) says in the Quran: Fawzul azeem. If Allah is pleased with us, and we gain Jannah, that is success. But why set one’s aim low. I set mine very low indeed, I thought if I could get to al-a3raaf, I would be fine, until someone pointed it out that I was being too pessimistic; why not seek Firdawse a3alaa? And what if one sees that one falls very short? Mike: Here is a bit for you about the US and me. After spending 3-4 months of winter in Ontario (I think it was December 76), I concluded that I couldn’t look forward to that snow all my life, so I bought a ticket back to old London. As the plane flew into New York at night, I saw a pretty sight - several streams of light, cars on the road. I had to change at New York to another plane from another airport, and during the process, I debated with myself if I should fly to California instead. That was my dream until the age of 20 - to take a doctorate working under Linus Pauling on Quantum Chemistry. Maybe some day I will still come to work in the US, but now I wish to go to Medina. I told my wife some months back that now I want to work either at Mecca/Medina or California. She laughs: what a choice you want? It strikes funny to most muslims :) sis lala marcy, I used to write letters and occasional essays, and in those days all my efforts were accepted for publication. I gave up because of my deteriorating eyesight. alhamdolillah, Allah (swt) made me instrumental in bringing about some changes through my letters :) The reality though is that the problems with my jobs and health have been to bring me back to the deen because I have a tendency to stray and be sidetracked by the world. How can I ever be grateful enough to Allah? Even in my suffering He is being Merciful. |
| Re: I am but human :) |
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| yumna |
| 06/14/04 at 11:49:52 |
| ...when i read ur post of seeking advice i didn't reply coz i didn't know wat to say ..still i have nothing to say im adviceless .. :(..all i can say is u are in my prayers ..and that ur advices to me or to any1 have always been my first priority coz i know the old r the wise ...um not that ur old or anything like that really but still ur my elder my uncle (mamoo) just got retired ...don't know wats he gonna do next ..he must hardly b in mid 30...he was desperate to get retired as he is a diabetic and wants to relax...u no a soldiers life is tff one ... |
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