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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Dealing with family members? |
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| Anonymous |
| 08/14/04 at 15:56:35 |
| Assalamu alaikum, What can someone do when someone you are close to is always taking liberties, demanding, expecting things? Especially when they're a member of your own family. They are always expecting to drop round whenever they feel like it, always expecting to borrow things, etc. These are not things that are troubling in isolation. It's good to help people out especially when they're in need, and especially when they're your own family or friends. It's just its always expected, and taken as granted, that anything they want will be provided. What makes it worse that they are of a very agressive, uncompromising nature. I try to overlook it, and just pray to Allah to give me patience in dealing with them. They say provocative things, then when I remain silent, they say stuff like "why are you getting annoyed" or "why are you so sensitive". Then I feel I have to try and justify why I'm not "annoyed", which makes me more annoyed. I've tried talking to this person, but it's difficult to have a deep conversation with them. They tell me I'm over analysing things, and they become aggressive. They seem to think that everyone is against them all the time. Then I feel bad, even thought they're the one who was rude to me. In the few times I get annoyed, and speak up, they act so irrationally that I feel reluctant to try and even say anything. Even I try and explain something in a calm way, they fly off the handle and become verbally abusive. I feel a sinking feeling in my stomach when I have to talk to them, and I hate feeling this way, and very guilty. But I'm so frustrated with the whole thing, I don't know how to address this issue. |
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