Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board

A R C H I V E S

Re: How to Get Married Fast (very funny)

Madina Archives


Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board

Re: How to Get Married Fast (very funny)
A_Stranger
10/12/04 at 16:48:06
[slm]

Yeah, the writer of that piece has a sense of humour, mashaAllaah. Just one thing, I humbly suggest you remove that attached picture since the person (in the pic) may not approve of anyone posting his picture all over the net.

Wallaahu a'lam.

Re: How to Get Married Fast (very funny)
Saam
10/12/04 at 18:09:21
[slm]

(This post is actually the original post modified)

Just a disclaimer: This is a hilarious article, but I am in no way advocating this methodology, just trying to give people a good laugh.  Here's the article:

[Begin quote]

Confession #3: How to Get Married Fast

For the slow-witted, painfully desperate guy (yes, that means you).

You are a slow-witted, painfully desperate guy who will go to all lengths to deny that fact. Your only chance to marry someone is either through your local Imam or your parents. Any girls who will even possibly consider marrying you will first, obviously, look at you.

Here's what you need to do:

1. Change your masjid. Go far, as far as you can. You need to go so far away so that no one in your new location would have previously seen you.  

2. Wear Niqab. But I'm a guy, you say? Don't worry ?theres precedent. Some of the Salaf who knew they were good looking and wanted to save themselves from glaring eyes would wear the Niqab.
 
So basically, you keep wearing Niqab and whenever someone asks you "Hey man, why do you cover your face?" You just need to calmly reply "When the Salaf feared that their looks would cause dissent between the female populace, they would cover their face."

After establishing your reputation as "the hot guy who's so hot he has to cover his face", simply ask your Imam to find you a wife. All the girls will be dying to marry you!

Of course after marriage, she's going to undoubtedly see your face…and so if she finds that you're hideous wouldn't she backtrack? No, she'll be so absorbed in the hype that you're good-looking, she'll never realize that you're not.

My ugly friend "Ismiyy" has employed my theory and people everywhere are now digging him.

[end quote]


Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
A R C H I V E S

Individual posts do not necessarily reflect the views of Jannah.org, Islam, or all Muslims. All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective owners. Comments are owned by the poster and may not be used without consent of the author.
The rest © Jannah.Org