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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Not being close to Allah? |
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| Anonymous |
| 11/27/04 at 02:37:58 |
| salams i was born into a muslim family, in my upbringing i learnt the do`s and dont`s of islam and heaven and hell. in the end it didnt really mean much beacuse i coudnt understand what it meant, apart from hell being place where you dont what to go i plodded along through life and gradually learnt more and started to practice islam more without feeling embarassed that i was practising now i have reached a stage in my life where i know he exsists, he is the creator and he will hold me to account. i feel so strongly for his presence, his power, his creation and i know this is the only true religion and have rejected all other faiths at the same time i dont feel close to him at all. i feel so sad when i read stories about new reverts loving allah swt more than anything in this life, this is how i should feel but i am so far from it i tried my best in ramadan to get close but was unable to..... i realised my problems lie in the fact i have no relationship with allah and his messenger the first point of call was to get close to him, then get close to his prophet but i dont know how when i pray i just pray, i have observed muslims pray, some are so peaceful, they want to pray they are so excited to pray with me is the opposite its just something i have to do even making dhikr, i managed to get my mind into gear, by saying alhamdolilah and being really thankful for his blessing that lasted a few days and i felt so great because it actually meant something, but now i try i cant i feel so afraid of death because theres no more going back, no more chances to get close, i dont want to die without being close to him and understanding him and following his messenger. i am finding extermly difficult to surrender to him, i have even been given the opportunity to go for hajj/umrah but i dont wnat to go because i dont know what i should feel, what i will feel, i wathced a programme last year following the journey of a br and sr going to hajj. when i saw them crying at mount arafat i felt so guilty this post i getting to long....in short please can someone provide me with advice |
| Re: Not being close to Allah? |
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| Maliha |
| 11/27/04 at 07:22:20 |
| [slm] Mashaallah Anon, its awesome that you are even thinking along the lines of wanting to get to close to Allah and fearing death...two things that a majority of Muslims seem to have forgotten, or ignore. You can't get close to Allah, or any of His creation for that matter, if you are not familiar with Him. In the sense that you have to get beyond the guilt, feeling, emotion to consciously increase your knowledge of Allah. The best way is directly through the Quran. Pray two Rakaahs asking for Guidance, and try to read Quran directly after Fajr to sunrise, Maghrib to Isha, or even in the depth of the night. Read it not in a monotone fashion to blindly get thawaabs, but to really reflect and ponder and with the niyyah of seeking *guidance* and more importantly implementing Allah's Will on this earth. Try also going to classes in a Masjid near you; being around people that seek closeness to Allah; or are already further ahead on the path is one of the best ways of increasing your own Imaan and getting you motivated to become a better Muslim. The opportunity to do Hajj and Umrah is incredible:) Mabrook:) Start preparing yourself now! Read books on Hajj, try to understand the deeper meaning behind each action you will be performing, memorize the duahs and just simply pray to Allah each day to grant you Tawfeeq. What an honor that you have received an invitation to go Mashaallah:) I remember someone asked an amazing Sheikh, what if you don't feel the sweetness of worship? What if you don't want to pray, do dhikr, read Quran, etc? What are you supposed to do then? He answered that you dont wait to be healthy to take a "bitter" medicine. When you don't "feel" the sweetness of worship, its because the heart is afflicted by your past sins, diseases of apathy and laziness, etc. Quran, dhikr, salaat *Are* the medicines to these diseases. So in the beginning it will be hard, and you have to drag yourself...but if you keep fighting your inclination to wanna chill, sleep, etc for the sake of Allah only...you will be rewarded amply for it. There are so many heart warming Hadiths and Ayahs about Allah being so close to us; and if we ask sincerely and repent; He will forgive us and grant us guidance, Mercy and Inshaallah Jannah. Take heart and build on what you already have. The feelings are a good start; but you should get beyond the emotion to actually seek knowledge, implement it, and strive to "walk" the "walk"...:) May Allah grant us all Mercy and Guidance..and May He forgive our sins and lift the veils that hide our lowly hearts from His true Majesty. (amin). [wlm] |
| Re: Not being close to Allah? |
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| anon |
| 11/27/04 at 09:03:49 |
| [slm] Some people like to get a teacher/mentor to help them along the way! You would still have to do all sis Nur mentioned so it is not any easier :P |
| Re: Not being close to Allah? |
|---|
| georger |
| 12/17/04 at 01:16:01 |
| [quote author=Anonymous link=board=madrasa;num=1101537479;start=0#0 date=11/27/04 at 02:37:58]salams i was born into a muslim family, in my upbringing i learnt the do`s and dont`s of islam and heaven and hell. in the end it didnt really mean much beacuse i coudnt understand what it meant, apart from hell being place where you dont what to go i plodded along through life and gradually learnt more and started to practice islam more without feeling embarassed that i was practising now i have reached a stage in my life where i know he exsists, he is the creator and he will hold me to account. i feel so strongly for his presence, his power, his creation and i know this is the only true religion and have rejected all other faiths at the same time i dont feel close to him at all. i feel so sad when i read stories about new reverts loving allah swt more than anything in this life, this is how i should feel but i am so far from it i tried my best in ramadan to get close but was unable to..... i realised my problems lie in the fact i have no relationship with allah and his messenger the first point of call was to get close to him, then get close to his prophet but i dont know how when i pray i just pray, i have observed muslims pray, some are so peaceful, they want to pray they are so excited to pray with me is the opposite its just something i have to do even making dhikr, i managed to get my mind into gear, by saying alhamdolilah and being really thankful for his blessing that lasted a few days and i felt so great because it actually meant something, but now i try i cant i feel so afraid of death because theres no more going back, no more chances to get close, i dont want to die without being close to him and understanding him and following his messenger. i am finding extermly difficult to surrender to him, i have even been given the opportunity to go for hajj/umrah but i dont wnat to go because i dont know what i should feel, what i will feel, i wathced a programme last year following the journey of a br and sr going to hajj. when i saw them crying at mount arafat i felt so guilty this post i getting to long....in short please can someone provide me with advice [/quote] You're human. You've got doubts whether you admit them or not. Doubts are what help us separate truth from fiction. It's like not being able to see the forest because there are too many trees in the way. So much - too much - weight is given to ritual, to seeing what others do, to the point where this becomes an idol onto itself. And it becomes very confusing. You have more exploration of your faith and understanding to do, in order to strengthen it and experience more practical uses for it. You won't be able to do that while staying in your "comfort zone". To grow you'll have to step out of the "comfort zone" and put your belief to the test. Otherwise your doubts will grow faster than your beliefs and then you'll end up spiritually dead. Just my 2¢ worth... |
| 12/17/04 at 01:18:24 |
| georger |
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