A R C H I V E S
Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| AbdulMuhsee |
| 01/13/05 at 23:16:21 |
| Assalemu Alaikum Before I get to the main topic, I would like to ask a quick question. Allah states that if people are mocking or disrespecting Islam, you should not be among them until the topic has changed. Does this mean that we should not even be among the whorelike women in the U.S? And what if your kaffir father invites you to dinner and is drinking a miller lite, should you then leave the house? Main topic: 5:51 = O you who believe, take not the Jews and the Christians for friends. They are friends of each other. And whoever amongst you takes them for friends he is indeed one of them. Surely Allah guides not the unjust people. Does this mean that I cannot be friends with a Christian boy even though he bears no hate against Islam? The part that says "They are friends of each other" could mean that Allah is referring to the Jews and Christians that (almost all of them) rejected the new message and took up swords against the Muslims, as they made treaties and both attacked the Muslim ummah. But then again, a few verses later it says: 5:57: O you who believe, take not for friends those who take your religion as a mockery and a sport, from among those who were given the Book before you and the disbelievers; and keep your duty to Allah if you are believers. Now it states that you can be friends with the Jews and Christians and the disbelievers as long as they do not take Islam as a joke. Wouldn't the Jews and Christians also be disbelievers? Who exactly are the disbelievers then? I am confused about these two ayats. Then near the end of the Quran there is a soorah that states: 109:1-6 = Say: O disbelievers, I serve not what you serve, Nor do you serve Him Whom I serve, Nor shall I serve that which ye serve, Nor do you serve Him Whom I serve. For you is your recompense and for me my recompense. What is the difference between the "People of the Book" and the disbelievers? In my opinion (and I know I should not be guessing) the People of the Book are those who have not been brought yet the message of Islam and the disbelievers are those who rejected it.... but what of those who rejected it but still acted peacefully towards the Muslim ummah? 9:123 = O you who believe, fight those of the disbelievers who are near to you and let them find firmness in you. And know that Allah is with those who keep their duty. This verse says to fight the disbelievers... and nowhere near it does in mention that they must attack you first. Does this mean that whenever a "disbeliever" is mentioned that it means someone who rejects the message and is physically hostile towards you, or does it mean kill any non-muslim you see? The first time the Quran ever mentions fighting Allah states that you may only fight if your opponent physically threatens you first... while the prior one I mentioned does not: 2:190 = And fight in the way of Allah against those who fight against you but be not aggressive. Surely Allah loves not the aggressors. 2:191 = And kill them wherever you find them, and drive them out from where they drove you out, and persecution is worse than slaughter. And fight not with them at the Sacred Mosque until they fight with you in it; so if they fight you in it, slay them. Such is the recompense of the disbelievers. 2:192 = But if they desist, then surely Allah is forgiving, Merciful. 2:193 = And fight them until there is no prosecution, and religion is only for Allah. But if they desist, then there should be no hostility except against the oppressors. But what does "fight them until religion is only for Allah" mean? Does it mean that you must kill them all unless they accept the new message? Does "if they desist, then surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful" really mean "if they convert to Islam, then surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful"? Does this mean that if they offered peace we must still reject it and continue to slaughter unless they become Muslim? Insha'Allah answers will come and strengthen my eeman as well as all the muslims reading this post. I apologize for the lengthiness, but I didn't want to start yet another new topic in a separate thread. |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| jannah |
| 01/13/05 at 23:34:01 |
| I rather find your post kind of disrespectful. There are alot of good respectful women (and men) in the U.S. there is no need to insult them. And if your father, or anyone invited you to have a miller lite why would it make any difference what your reaction is? you should be kind to everyone and that especially means your parents. it doesn't mean you compromise your faith. just explain what you can or can't do. about the whole awliyah- mistranslated as "friend" thing we've had a number of threads addressing this topic. you might check in this forum going back for it. people of the book refers to the jews and christians the word kafir is a whole other huge topic, but simply it means "denier of faith" or "disbeliever" its interesting how you take some verses and then try to make rules by them. this is a mistake people who hate islam make... take some time to study the issue as a whole and see what islam really teaches about those things.. often times the "verse" people quote have verses before and after what is quoted clarify and explain the topic as well as hadith (traditions of the prophet) and scholarly interpretation explain the topic. as for the rest of your post along the lines of [quote]Does it mean that you must kill them all unless they accept the new message?[/quote] come on.. that's kind of ridiculous.. if you are muslim you would know better.. why would anyone be part of a faith that was out to kill everyone??? that's ridiculous.. [that's along the lines of journalists after 9/11 saying that muslims were "jealous of our freedom and that's why 9/11 happenned"....completely, farcically, ludicrous] from the very beginning islam has always accepted all faiths.. we have extremely complex, detailed rulings and laws even on how to protect non-muslims in a muslim society and state i would even claim that islam is the only religion in the world that as a religious system accepts other faiths and allows them to coexist with it's own adherents. |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| AbdulMuhsee |
| 01/14/05 at 15:41:31 |
| Assalemu Alaikum I apologize for being disrespectful, but it is merely because I always get answers such as yours, so I am forceful rather than passive. Don't just tell me the answer in your own words, use Quran. I seek only to understand. I go to a school where the girls have sexual relations in the bathrooms during class, so I think my description of them is well-founded. Being the sole Muslim among a sea of kuffar can get on your nerves sometimes. |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| chocolate |
| 01/14/05 at 16:01:34 |
| [slm] First of all these snowman faces are really cute :) To answer your question, being friends with kafirs, i think, though I am not fully positive, is ok because you are representing islam to them, and thus i fu make a good statement of islam, you will educate an dmake them aware of islam. this is like dawah Dont take certain verses out of context as they can be misleading and not give you the right emssage. look at the surah as a whole. i also agree with jannah when - "times the "verse" people quote have verses before and after what is quoted clarify and explain the topic as well as hadith (traditions of the prophet) and scholarly interpretation explain the topic." i know what you mean by the question however i'm not a n expert of this topic so I suugest you read some of the other threads Sorry I sound offensive in a ny way thanks chocoalte :-) [wlm] |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| jannah |
| 01/14/05 at 16:11:38 |
| [quote]Don't just tell me the answer in your own words, use Quran.[/quote] Islam is not about the Quran only. How would one pray if using only Quran or how would one understand a huge amount of concepts by only using the Quran. So please don't take verses out of context without understanding them and thus ignoring the whole body of Islam, Hadith and Scholarship that explains our deen. |
| 01/14/05 at 16:12:27 |
| jannah |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| Maliha |
| 01/14/05 at 18:56:08 |
| [slm] Here are the Quranic ayahs you are looking for. Based on the following ayahs and the actions of the Rasul [saw] (especially in his treatment of the people of the book); the Scholars suggest that the ayahs below are the General ayahs; while those speaking of fighting are specific only in times of war and self defense. Although I have a feeling it won't matter much...some people ask questions to sincerely find out the answers...others, simply want to rouse themselves and others. I am hoping, br. you are among the former and this is not a waste of endeavor. Kheir Inshaallah. [quote] 060.007 It may be that God will grant love (and friendship) between you and those whom ye (now) hold as enemies. For God has power (over all things); And God is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. 060.008 God forbids you not, with regard to those who fight you not for (your) Faith nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them: for God loveth those who are just. 060.009 God only forbids you, with regard to those who fight you for (your) Faith, and drive you out of your homes, and support (others) in driving you out, from turning to them (for friendship and protection). It is such as turn to them (in these circumstances), that do wrong. [/quote] |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| AbdulMuhsee |
| 01/14/05 at 20:06:12 |
| Assalemu Alaikum Please, it is not enjoyable when someone accuses you of being a kaffir. The Holy Prophet never accused any fellow Muslim seeking to understand of being a kaffir, and it deeply hurts me when you point fingers. Anyways, about the word "awliyah": what does it mean? I can't read arabic, so I have to rely on arabic-speaking people to tell me this. Indeed people will leave out things and twist things to make Islam sound bad, and that is exactly what happens when you're among people who hate Islam, and that is why my eeman suffers. |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| asad |
| 01/21/05 at 05:07:23 |
| [slm] br abdulmuhsee,how are you? are you a convert? you have to understand islam,the beuty of islam and what it teaches you,how the quran and salat are all ways to find peace within yourself,it takes time but inshallah it is worth it to take the time and learn.The people in this world take much effort and strain to learn wordly knowledge when its temps but what about deeni knowledge when its forever,a doctor his knowledge will benifiet him untill his able as soon as he gets old people are gona not take notice and then wheen he enters the grave all the books he read all the years he spent in shool none of that will matter,but the knowledge a person has of deen benifits him in this world while his a live after when his in the grave and in the akharath.In this world you might meet a lot of pervers people that do things that will disgust you but they do it because they do not have understanding of thier lives who valuable it is,and when they go into akharath i would hate to be in thier shoes you understand?wheras a mumin he will be honoured in the akharath with a life of ease without hardships,a life of comfort without pains,a life of knowledge without ignorance and a life of riches without a trace of poverty,thats what its about a test and we all get tested in our own ways and situatuions so dont let the kaufar get to you show patience and for-bearance in the face of ignorance,and know that to achive a high station in jannah the more a person hast to be tried. all praise to Allah swt the lord of the worlds to whom belongs all glory and we make dua to Allah for guidence in this world and peace in the next.Ameen |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| ibs81 |
| 01/21/05 at 10:32:57 |
| This is from islam-qa.com: [color=red]Question : [/color] [color=black] In the Quraan, it says that we can not take the Kuffaar as awliyaa, but what does that mean? I mean, to what degree? Can we do business with them still? If I'm at school, can we play basketball with them? Can we talk to them about basketball and stuff? Can we hang out with them as long as they keep their beliefs to themselves? The reason I ask is because someone I know does hang out with them in this way and it doesn't affect his beliefs, but I still tell him, "Why don't you hang out with the muslims instead?" He says that most or many of the Muslims drink and take drugs where they hang out and they have girlfriends and he's afraid that the sins of the Muslims will lure him, yet he's sure that the Kufr of the Kaafirs will not lure him because that's something that isn't attractive to him. So is hanging out with them, playing sports with them, and talking with them about sports considered as "taking them as awliyaa instead of the believers" keeping in mind that he is doing that for his own eemaan?.[/color] [color=blue]Answer : [/color] [color=black] Praise be to Allaah. Firstly: Allaah has forbidden the believers to take the kaafireen (disbelievers) as friends, and He has issued a stern warning against doing that. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “O you who believe! Take not the Jews and the Christians as Awliyaa’ (friends, protectors, helpers), they are but Awliyaa’ of each other. And if any amongst you takes them (as Awliyaa’), then surely, he is one of them. Verily, Allaah guides not those people who are the Zaalimoon (polytheists and wrongdoers and unjust)” [al-Maa’idah 5:51] Shaykh al-Shanqeeti (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: In this verse Allaah tells us that whoever takes the Jews and Christians as friends is one of them because of his taking them as friends. Elsewhere Allaah states that taking them as friends incurs the wrath of Allaah and His eternal punishment, and that if the one who takes them as friends was a true believer he would not have taken them as friends. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “You see many of them taking the disbelievers as their Awliyaa’ (protectors and helpers). Evil indeed is that which their ownselves have sent forward before them; for that (reason) Allaah’s Wrath fell upon them, and in torment they will abide. 81. And had they believed in Allaah, and in the Prophet (Muhammad) and in what has been revealed to him, never would they have taken them (the disbelievers) as Awliyaa’ (protectors and helpers); but many of them are the Faasiqoon (rebellious, disobedient to Allaah)” [al-Maa’idah 5:80-81] Elsewhere Allaah forbids taking them as friends and explains the reason for that, as He says (interpretation of the meaning): “O you who believe! Take not as friends the people who incurred the Wrath of Allaah (i.e. the Jews). Surely, they have despaired of (receiving any good in) the Hereafter, just as the disbelievers have despaired of those (buried) in graves (that they will not be resurrected on the Day of Resurrection)” [al-Mumtahanah 60:13] In another verse Allaah explains that this is so long as they are not taken as friends because of fear or taqiyah (i.e., being friendly with them in order to avoid harm); if that is the case then the one who does that is excused. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Let not the believers take the disbelievers as Awliyaa’ (supporters, helpers) instead of the believers, and whoever does that, will never be helped by Allaah in any way, except if you indeed fear a danger from them” [Aal ‘Imraan 3:28] This verse explains all the verses quoted above which forbid taking the kaafirs as friends in general terms. What that refers to is in cases where one has a choice, but in cases of fear and taqiyah it is permissible to make friends with them, as much as is essential to protect oneself against their evil. That is subject to the condition that one’s faith should not be affected by that friendship and the one who is behaves in that manner out of necessity is not one who behaves in that manner out of choice. It may be understood from the apparent meaning of these verses that the one who deliberately takes the kuffaar as friends by choice and because he likes them, is one of them. End quote. Adwa’ al-Bayaan, 2/98,99 One of the forms of making friends with the kaafirs which is forbidden is taking them as friends and companions, mixing with them and eating and playing with them. In the answer to question no. 10342 we have quoted Shaykh Ibn Baaz as saying: Eating with a kaafir is not haraam if it is necessary to do so, or if that serves some shar’i interest. But they should not be taken as friends, so you should not eat with them for no shar’i reason or for no shar’i purpose. You should not sit and chat with them and laugh with them. But if there is a reason to do so, such as eating with a guest, or to invite them to Islam or to guide them to the truth, or for some other shar’i reason, then it is OK. The fact that the food of the People of the Book is halaal for us does not mean that we may take them as friends and companions. It does not mean that we may eat and drink with them for no reason and for no shar’i purpose. Shaykh Muhammad al-Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked about the ruling on mixing with the kuffaar and treating them kindly hoping that they will become Muslim. He replied: Undoubtedly the Muslim is obliged to hate the enemies of Allaah and to disavow them, because this is the way of the Messengers and their followers. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Indeed there has been an excellent example for you in Ibraaheem (Abraham) and those with him, when they said to their people: ‘Verily, we are free from you and whatever you worship besides Allaah, we have rejected you, and there has started between us and you, hostility and hatred for ever until you believe in Allaah Alone’” [al-Mumtahanah 60:4] “You (O Muhammad) will not find any people who believe in Allaah and the Last Day, making friendship with those who oppose Allaah and His Messenger (Muhammad), even though they were their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their kindred (people). For such He has written Faith in their hearts, and strengthened them with Rooh (proofs, light and true guidance) from Himself” [al-Mujaadilah 58:22] Based on this, it is not permissible for a Muslim to feel any love in his heart towards the enemies of Allaah who are in fact his enemies too. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “O you who believe! Take not My enemies and your enemies (i.e. disbelievers and polytheists) as friends, showing affection towards them, while they have disbelieved in what has come to you of the truth” [al-Mumtahanah 60:1] But if a Muslim treats them with kindness and gentleness in the hope that they will become Muslim and will believe, there is nothing wrong with that, because it comes under the heading of opening their hearts to Islam. But if he despairs of them becoming Muslim, then he should treat them accordingly. This is something that is discussed in detail by the scholars, especially in the book Ahkaam Ahl al-Dhimmah by Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him). Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, 3, question no. 389. Secondly: With regard to what this person says about not mixing with sinful Muslims for fear that he may be tempted by their sins, but the kufr of the kuffaar does not tempt him, the answer to that is: As for not mixing with Muslims who commit sin, he is doing well thereby, if he is not able to advise them and forbid them to do evil, and he fears that he may fall into the same sins and think it is something good. With regard to mixing with the kuffaar, the reason why mixing with the kuffaar is not allowed is not only the fear that one may fall into kufr, rather the main reason for this ruling is their enmity towards Allaah and His Messenger and the believers. Allaah has indicated this reason in the verse where He says (interpretation of the meaning): “O you who believe! Take not My enemies and your enemies (i.e. disbelievers and polytheists) as friends, showing affection towards them, while they have disbelieved in what has come to you of the truth (i.e. Islamic Monotheism, this Qur’aan, and Muhammad), and have driven out the Messenger (Muhammad) and yourselves (from your homeland) because you believe in Allaah your Lord” [al-Mumtahanah 60:1] So how can it be appropriate for a Muslim to keep company with the enemy of Allaah and his enemy, and make friends with him? How can he be certain that he will not start to think of their ways as good? Many Muslims have fallen into kufr and heresy and have apostatized from Islam because of keeping company with the kuffaar and living in their countries. Some of them have become Jews and some have become Christians, and some have embraced atheistic philosophies. We ask Allaah to make us steadfast in following His religion. See also the answer to question no. 2179, which explains the important principle of the prohibition on taking the kuffaar as close friends. It also describes many forms of the kinds of friendship that are forbidden. In the answer to question no. 43270 you will find the ruling on saying that the morals and manners of the kuffaar are better than those of the Muslims, and there is a quotation from Shaykh Ibn Baaz on the prohibition on saying such a thing. In the answer to question no. 26118 and 23325 it is stated that it is forbidden to keep company with the kuffaar and make friends with them. And Allaah knows best. Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com)[/color] |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| muslimah853 |
| 01/23/05 at 21:51:00 |
| [slm] At the risk of sounding completely cranky about this, I absolutely despise the line of thinking that says that non-Muslims are only worth any type of attention unless there is a hope that they will accept Islam. The above fatwa makes absolutely no mention of the ayat that Nur al Layl posted. Why? I am no one to criticise, but I wonder why these ayat are not considered in giving a more well rounded picture of the entire question. Obviously one should not put oneself in compromising positions, but at the same people shouldn't be treated as if they are lepers unless there is a possibility that we might 'win them over.' if that is our attitude then frankly we shouldn't be surprised when people take one look at us and wonder why on earth anyone would want to emulate that. I mean, it's rather patronizing (among other things) to only agree to be someone's friend if you are trying to convert them. We owe it to people to be genuine, to have a certain amount of respect for them simply because they are a part of Allah's creation. That doesn't mean that you have to agree with their beliefs or endorse wrong behavior. But it is rather sickening to hear people talk like dogs about non-Muslims, to hear about how worthless and/or depraved they are, and as soon as they start expressing interest in Islam, suddenly we are all concerned about them, telling them how noble they are, etc. I guess because I used to be one of those 'other', that I don't like the idea that some (let me stress *some*) members of my chosen faith community feel that I was some kind of diseased untouchable until I saw the light. The Prophet [saw] told us about the rights of the neighbor. He didn't say that only applies to the Muslim neighbor. The non-Muslim woman who used to dump garbage on his head every day received a visit from him when he noticed that she was missing one day and subsequently found out that she had fallen ill. When the funeral of the Jewish woman passed by him and his sahaba, he stood for it because it was a human soul. Where is this compassion for others of Bani Adam in the Muslims? I remember Imam Siraj giving a talk about da'wa years ago, and one of the things that he emphasized is that you cannot call people to Islam unless you have mercy and genuine concern for them as people. Masha'allah, coming from one of the biggest da'is of our time and place. Let me state for the record that I know not all, or even most Muslims feel this way. But it's there. |
| Re: Who is allowed as a friend? |
|---|
| Anonymous |
| 02/09/05 at 18:47:49 |
| The conditions you describe in your school are terrible, but you must know that many non-Muslims are just as revolted and offended by it as you are. Record numbers of parents are homeschooling their children because so many schools are anti-God, and colleges can be downright challenging about it. They (educational institutions) forget they are places of general learning, not the pins in students spiritual balloons. Be aware that many non-Muslims fear God and have very high standards--and are digging in their heels as society slides downward--they don't like immorality and wickedness any more than you do. If every religion believed that it must kill non-believers--that would be the most horrendous thing. You could wipe out oh, maybe several billion people. It would be the worst bloodbath in history. As a non-Muslim, but a religious person, I have had to explain myself probably 1,000's of times--why don't I swear, smoke, drink, party, etc. Some think I am crazy for not doing those things, but I have never thought of killing them. In my religion, I would be punished severely for doing so. |
Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board |