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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
| Help please Child problems |
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| sadiqahbahijah |
| 03/21/05 at 08:05:58 |
| Asalam alaykom, I am very depressed and do not know what to do. My daughter 19 years old is chroming (inhaling enamel spray paint) drinking speed and alchol and today told me she wants no further contact from me at all. She is abusive towards me and her 3 brothers and has been since she was 14 yrs old when she left home. I moved from one state to another over half of Australia to provide her with a home and in 2 months she left 4 times and lied about me to other people to achieve accomodation in a refuge each time. I dont know what to do she is killing herself and i am starting to feel dead inside. I am finding Islam hard I hardly pray now although I am doing dua often, I have no friends and feeling hurt, confused, lonley and very very sad. :'( |
| Re: Help please Child problems |
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| timbuktu |
| 03/21/05 at 09:45:56 |
| [slm] so sorry to hear of your daughter's problems. I don't know how to say this, but please this is coming from someone who has been through a lot of ups and downs in life, and has seen quite a few in this world. These are trials. Most of the time these things happen because of our own mistakes. But we take the easy way out and start blaming Allah (swt). My family has been through many, many turmoils, but we have come out all right at the end. [u]Mother's duas![/u] First, realise what I have said earlier: that what we go through is because of our own mistakes, even if we do not comprehend what it is we have done wrong. So, ask Allah for forgiveness, ie: do istaghfaar, say: "Astaghfirullah" many, many times. The prophet [saw] encouraged us Muslims to do Istaghfaar, saying that he himself did that 70 times. For the truly pious, these trials may be to uplift their station in the afterlife. second, do not give up Salaah. My mother not only prayed the regular Salaah, but also the Tahajjud, and prayed for us. third, make lots of duas. fourth: if the daughter were living with you, it would be better, but for now, between the Fajr sunnah and fard, do this: 1. say thana (praise of Allah (swt)), 2. duroode Ibrahimi (ie the durood we say in our Salaah) 3. then Surah Fatiha with Bismillahir Rehmanir Raheem - 41 times 4. then duroode Ibrahimi again 5. then think of your daughter, and blow on her image in your mind. 6. Do not say anything else or talk to anyone until after the fard and regular duas. 7. Do this for 40 days. say Ayatul Kursi all the time, and put her in Allah's care. So, your wazifa is Istaghfaar and Ayatu Kursi making lots of duas and the Surah fatiha as I have said earlier. Insha`Allah all will be right. We will be praying for you and your daughter. |
| 03/21/05 at 11:50:32 |
| timbuktu |
| Re: Help please Child problems |
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| Fozia |
| 03/23/05 at 07:42:47 |
| [slm] Sr, unfortunately you are not alone in your plight, a lot of this is happening. As Br. Timbuktu says remain steadfast in your imaan, Inshallah you will find a solution therein. Also is there no support network around for parents of children dependant on drugs?? For example we have drugs clinics around, which offer help and advice for those affected by drug abuse, not just the abuser but parents siblings etc.... May be worth looking into, so you know how to help react to your daughter. Your daughter won't listen or stop until she is ready, till then keep her in your duaas (as will we I'm sure Inshallah), and take care of yourself too for yourself and for your other children. Love & Duaas Wassalaam |
| Re: Help please Child problems |
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| timbuktu |
| 03/23/05 at 11:45:11 |
| [slm] please read these: http://www.islamonline.net/QuestionApplication/English/display.asp?hquestionID=15016 http://www.islamonline.net/QuestionApplication/English/display.asp?hquestionID=15649 http://www.islamonline.net/Tarbia/english/display.asp?hquestionID=4917 http://www.islamonline.net/QuestionApplication/English/display.asp?hquestionID=15883 http://www.islamonline.net/QuestionApplication/English/display.asp?hquestionID=14845 |
| Re: Help please Child problems |
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| sadiqahbahijah |
| 03/28/05 at 08:50:03 |
| Thankyou for the advice I am trying to work on this and make myself pray regular. |
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