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Madinat al-Muslimeen Islamic Message Board
By way of saying hello |
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Ibu |
08/11/05 at 02:33:16 |
[slm] Dear All, I am new to the forum. This is my way of saying hello.. (Sorry to those who have read it). Ibu :-) These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts of America , and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. ______________________________ ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? WITNESS: July 18th. ATTORNEY: What year? WITNESS: Every year. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you? WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which. ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you? WITNESS: Forty-five years. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?" ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo? WITNESS: We both do. ATTORNEY: Voodoo? WITNESS: We do. ATTORNEY: You do? WITNESS: Yes, voodoo. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ___________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.. ________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Would you repeat the question? ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Uh.. .. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None . ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him! ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Huh? ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. |
Re: By way of saying hello |
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jannah |
08/11/05 at 09:55:00 |
slm, Welcome Ibu! Please tell us a little about yourself. Take care inshallah :-* Welcoming Bandwagon :-* |
Re: By way of saying hello |
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Ibu |
08/11/05 at 20:11:59 |
Alaikumsalaam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. Dear Jannah and all, as my name says, I am a mother (Ibu in Indonesian language means mother). I have two daughters. Oh, and I am also a journalist. My dream is to one day be with my family in Madina Al-Munawarah and Makkah, insha Allah. Warmest greetings from Indonesia. Wassalaamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. :-) Ibu |
Re: By way of saying hello |
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Fozia |
08/12/05 at 10:49:20 |
[slm] That is the funniest thing I have ever read. :D Welcome to the board long may you be addicted ;) Wassalaam |
Re: By way of saying hello |
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rkhan |
08/13/05 at 00:47:36 |
[slm] wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuhu ahlan wa sahlan wa marhaban bik [quote] as my name says, I am a mother (Ibu in Indonesian language means mother). I have two daughters. Oh, and I am also a journalist. My dream is to one day be with my family in Madina Al-Munawarah and Makkah, insha Allah. [/quote] Ameen to your duaa..I'm an Umm to daughters too and have worked in publishing ..pls tell us a little more abt youreslf.. how old are your daughters? do you work with a newspaper/mag?...what are things like in Indonesia? looking forward to hearing from you in shaa Allaah |
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